🎙️ First Hour Analysis 🎙️

Analysis of Matt & Bob Show 07-13-2023

Food items/restaurants talked about:

• Water Burger onions (08:27) – Bob mentions looking for dropped Water Burger onions on the floor
• Starbucks cold brew (10:46) – Bob mentions having coffee/cold brew
• McDonald’s McCafe (36:11) – Referenced as where seniors would stop for coffee
• Pizza (26:51) – Chewie jokingly asks “You want to order some pizza?”
• Maya’s (27:41) – Matt mentions possibly going to Maya’s restaurant
• Lunch was discussed throughout, with Bob mentioning he forgot his wallet and couldn’t buy lunch (26:56)

News stories talked about during this portion:

No traditional news stories were discussed during this portion.

What was the “Click Click Boom” segment about? Please list any clickbait news the hosts mention:

Timestamp: 12:03

The “Click Click Boom” segment focused on “amazing firsts in history”:

• First murder evidence (13:09) – A skull discovered in a Spanish cave from 430,000 BC showing evidence of being bashed in
• First reference to crop circles (14:17) – From 1678 in a tale called “The Mowing Devil”
• Earliest recorded name (15:17) – A Sumerian accountant named Kashim from 3400 BC who signed his name to an accounting error
• First catfishing victim (18:43) – King Henry VIII in 1539 with Anne of Cleves, who didn’t resemble her portrait

Funny moments or memorable quotes during this portion:

• “I wouldn’t call it that, but, well, by an accident, an accidental, what do you call it, like a manslaughter? Would it have been a, would you have manslaughtered yourself?” (00:38) – Matt discussing Bob’s propane incident
• “I don’t like, I don’t want to embarrass myself. I want people to have a good feeling about me. I think I’m smart and stuff and things.” (01:23) – Bob discussing not paying his electric bill
• “We’re not that great, but there’s really nowhere else to go.” (02:06) – Bob on their show compared to other Austin radio
• The entire propane gas leak story (06:00-12:00) – Bob forgot he turned on the gas burner, left it running for 10+ minutes while cleaning the kitchen, creating a dangerous situation and nearly passing out
• The “Impossible S” discussion (16:36-20:36) – Extended conversation about the S everyone drew in school, with Bob completely unfamiliar with it
• Matt and Bob having a “high moment” (26:00) – Matt observing that Bob (from propane exposure) and Chewie (naturally high) were both having simultaneous high moments
• “I almost brought breakfast. I’m so hungry I didn’t have dinner honestly.” followed by “You always have something lately.” (27:05) – Exchange about who’s buying food

Phone callers this portion:

No phone callers during this portion.

5 paragraph summary on Bob’s Rock and Roll News segment:

Timestamp: 30:12

Bob’s Rock and Roll News segment began with D. Snyder of Twisted Sister once again criticizing the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame for not respecting heavy metal enough. Snyder suggested they should have simply called it the “Music Hall of Fame” instead. Bob noted this wasn’t a new complaint, pointing out that Snyder seems to be in the news constantly with outrageous statements, similar to the guy from Oasis. Bob acknowledged that while Snyder isn’t wrong about metal being underrepresented, this argument has been made many times before. The segment also mentioned that Snyder is in the Long Island Music Hall of Fame alongside artists like Arlo Guthrie, Neil Diamond, and Zebra.

The news continued with an update about Disturbed embarking on their U.S. “Take Back Your Life” tour, which started in Denver, Colorado. Frontman David Draiman announced the band would be avoiding festivals this year because festival performances require shorter sets and limited equipment. Draiman wanted to bring out “all the toys” for their fans, which wouldn’t be possible at festivals where stage managers might cut them off or restrict their setup. This decision allows them to put on a fuller production without being beholden to festival constraints.

Bob’s “Rock and Roll News Seniors” segment focused on the Beach Boys’ current tour, which features very few original members. The tour has 40 dates scheduled through November, ending in Oklahoma, but notably missing are Brian Wilson, the late Carl and Dennis Wilson, Ricky Fattar, and Al Jardine. Mike Love remains as the original lead vocalist, giving some legitimacy to the tour. The only other recognizable name in the current lineup is John Cowsill from the Cowsills. Bob questioned whether this still constitutes the “authentic” Beach Boys experience.

The segment included a public service announcement from Loudwire about rowdy concert behavior, with Kentucky and Maine ranked as having the worst crowds. Bob listed ten things concertgoers should never do: holding phones up during entire shows, spilling drinks on people, shouting through shows, dancing and falling on others, squeezing in front of people who arrived earlier, wearing oversized hats that block views, starting fights, yelling obscenities at performers, and throwing objects on stage. Bob emphasized that rock and roll should be about “peace, love, and understanding,” not violence or disruption.

The Rock and Roll News Mailbag featured two letters. Rachel Giles wrote in as a female listener who finds the show hilarious and wants them to keep it exactly as it is. Alex Luchina sent Bob a picture of his “spin station” featuring a Crosley turntable, Bluetooth speaker, Matt and Chewy posters, rock and roll news poster, and Piranha Records wooden dollars. Bob offered to help Alex upgrade his turntable setup, asking him to send a budget. Bob also reminded listeners to always include their budget when asking for equipment recommendations, noting he receives several such emails daily.

Bands talked about during Bob’s rock and roll news segment:

• Twisted Sister
• Disturbed
• The Beach Boys
• King Crimson (reference)
• Status Quo (reference)
• Uriah Heep (reference)
• Herman’s Hermits
• Tesla
• Jethro Tull
• W.A.S.P.
• Linkin Park (mentioned in context of stolen box set)
• Metallica (mentioned as prize)
• Avenged Sevenfold (mentioned as prize)

3 paragraph summary of this portion of the show – excluding Bob’s Rock and Roll news:

The show opened with Bob recounting an embarrassing and dangerous incident from the previous night. While cleaning his kitchen around 10:30 PM, he turned on a gas burner to heat water in a skillet but never noticed it didn’t ignite. For over ten minutes, propane gas leaked into his house while he cleaned, with Bob initially thinking the smell was rotten food. He searched everywhere – the disposal, the floor, even other rooms – before finally hearing the hissing sound and realizing what had happened. Bob became lightheaded and worried about creating a spark that could cause an explosion, carefully opening the back door to ventilate. The smell lingered for about an hour, and Bob reflected on how the incident highlighted his tendency to never be “in the moment,” always thinking about past regrets or future obligations instead of focusing on the present task at hand.

The show’s “Click Click Boom” segment explored fascinating historical firsts, including the earliest evidence of murder (a 430,000 BC skull from a Spanish cave), the first reference to crop circles in a 1678 tale, and the earliest recorded human name – a Sumerian accountant named Kashim from 3400 BC who had to sign his name to an accounting error that has now been public for over 5,000 years. The discussion of King Henry VIII being possibly the first catfishing victim led to a conversation about modern makeup artistry, with Chewy showing a video of dramatic makeup transformations that completely changed women’s appearances. This sparked a debate about expectations versus reality in dating, with Chewy noting he doesn’t expect people to look like their heavily made-up or filtered photos, comparing it to how men can only hide features with beards.

The final segment revealed a theft mystery that had been building for three days. A Linkin Park vinyl box set valued at around $100, donated by a client (Piranha Records) to give away on air, had gone missing from their prize stash. Bob emphasized the importance of respecting clients and their donations, noting the area looked like it had been ransacked by a “rat or a mouse.” Rather than checking security cameras, they chose not to get anyone fired. The culprit was unexpectedly revealed when Bob jokingly asked video director Oliver if he had taken it, and Oliver’s guilty expression gave him away. Oliver admitted he just wanted to “see what was inside” and took it home to look at the album artwork, creating an awkward situation where he now needed to return the stolen property.

⏰ Second Hour Analysis ⏰

Analysis of Matt & Bob Show Transcript (Second Third) – 07-13-2023

Food items/restaurants talked about

• Amaya’s – Bob mentions wanting to take a meeting there (01:03:22)
• Chinese food – Referenced when discussing driverless cars (56:00)
• Government cheese – Chuy jokes about this when discussing a girlfriend on government assistance (01:24:59)

News stories talked about during this portion

• DPS/APD Partnership Suspension (53:37-57:23)
• Mayor Kirk Watson and interim city manager Jesus Garza suspended the DPS partnership with Austin Police Department
• Partnership was meant to supplement APD’s staffing shortages
• City council members received pushback from constituents in three districts
• People felt unsafe with the amount of patrolling
• Over 300 APD positions still need to be filled
• Austin Police Association called the suspension “unconscionable”

• Goats on Hike and Bike Trail (57:43-59:15)
• 150 goats being unleashed on the hike and bike trail
• Purpose: eat poison ivy and reduce wildfire risk
• Goats are unaffected by poison ivy
• Matt shared his personal poison ivy story involving a 30-foot tall poison ivy tree

• Kristen Kish to Replace Padma Lakshmi on Top Chef (01:00:27-01:01:46)
• Austin chef Kristen Kish replacing Padma Lakshmi as Top Chef host on Bravo
• Kish owns Arlo Gray restaurant in the Line Hotel (opened 2018)
• She won Top Chef previously
• Will judge with Tom Colicchio
• Next season filming in Wisconsin
• Lakshmi spent 20 years with the show

Funny or memorable quotes this portion

• “Once the shrink is off, you’ve lost half the value.” (49:44)
• “I’ll get some KLBJ ski masks that we have in there in the prize closet.” (52:13)
• “I do whatever I goddamn want to.” – Matt (52:41)
• “I dated a girl for a while that I thought was pious. It turns out she was tired.” – Matt (01:29:16)
• “You wanna form a posse comatatus? You want our police to work on tips?” – Matt about Bob’s DoorDash police idea (55:39)
• “The only jeans that have pockets big enough to carry my wallet and my change. That’s why I’m a big pocket jeans guy.” – Matt mocking Bob’s many sponsors (01:13:33)
• “I’ve got a KLBJ sock and I’ve got a bunch of KLBJ oranges that we can put down in the sock.” – Matt on punishing Oliver (51:17)

Phone callers this portion

• Eric (01:12:00) – Story about girlfriend whose ex-boyfriend was a masseuse providing “happy endings” to other men
• Duncan (01:18:28) – Joke caller who said his ex from Brazil “used to like to dress up as herself and act like just a prick all the time”
• Manny (01:26:52) – Story about girlfriend “Melinda” who cheated with his buddy Richard, two stepbrothers, and went to a witch doctor in Mexico to put a death spell on a married man; also mentioned dating a nymphomaniac
• Chris (01:31:00) – Story about ex-girlfriend’s family asking him to dispose of their dog’s remains while keeping the skull for naturalistic reasons

Recurring jokes or gags

• Oliver the Skater Boy Theft Saga – Continued discussion about Oliver stealing a $100 record album, with hosts debating punishments including:
• Making him wear embarrassing clothing
• Making him wear a wedding ring
• Removing a wheel from his skateboard
• Breaking into his house
• Ambushing him in the dark when he arrives
• Public suggestions for “torture and punishments”

• Bob’s Wealth/Sponsors – Running joke about Bob doing multiple live reads and making lots of money:
• “Big pocket jeans” fake sponsor bit
• References to Bob having more sponsors than anyone
• “The richest keep getting richer”
• Matt Going Long in Breaks – Bob and Chuy call out Matt for going too long before commercial breaks (52:38)

5 Paragraph Summary

The show continued discussions about Oliver, the skater boy intern who stole a $100 record album from the studio. The hosts expressed frustration that Oliver showed no remorse, with Matt noting he “had no respect for anybody in this room.” They debated various punishments, from making him wear embarrassing clothing to breaking into his house to steal something. Bob suggested opening it up to audience suggestions, while Chuy proposed making Oliver wear something that would make him look unavailable to ladies. The hosts theorized Oliver either fenced the album, gave it to impress a woman, or sold it back to Piranha Records where they originally received it.

Matt covered Austin news headlines, including the suspension of the DPS/APD partnership after pushback from city council members and constituents who felt unsafe with increased patrols. He also reported on 150 goats being unleashed on the hike and bike trail to eat poison ivy and reduce wildfire risk, sharing his personal story about getting poison ivy on his eyes and “nut sack” after moving into his new house. The segment concluded with news that Austin chef Kristen Kish would replace Padma Lakshmi as the host of Top Chef on Bravo.

Matt shared a lengthy story about his air conditioning breaking down the previous night when temperatures reached 83 degrees inside his house. He described his frustration troubleshooting the problem, eventually getting it working again through trial and error, though it took 10 hours to cool down 10 degrees. The situation was compounded when his wife mentioned an ant problem while he was already stressed, leading Matt to question why she would bring up additional problems at that moment. The story highlighted the challenges of home ownership in Austin’s extreme heat.

The main segment focused on the question “What embarrassing secrets do you know about your exes?” Several callers shared stories, including Eric whose girlfriend’s ex provided “happy endings” to men, and Manny who discovered his girlfriend Melinda had cheated with his friend and stepbrothers, plus visited a Mexican witch doctor to put a death spell on someone. Matt shared about dating someone who was committing Section 8 housing fraud, while Chuy mentioned dating someone with privilege who sideswiped a state trooper and faced no consequences. The hosts discussed how modern dating culture keeps exes in the picture as potential hookups, preventing people from sharing embarrassing stories.

The show promoted their upcoming Bob Fonseca’s Rock and Roll Trivia event at Moon Tower Saloon on Sunday, July 23rd from 3-5 PM. Throughout this portion, running jokes continued about Bob’s numerous sponsors and wealth, with Matt creating a fake “big pocket jeans” advertisement mocking Bob’s commercial success. The hosts maintained their chemistry through banter about relationships, home ownership challenges, and the ongoing Oliver theft situation that would be addressed when he returned to the studio.

🕐 Third Hour Analysis 🕐

Analysis of Matt & Bob Show (07-13-2023) – Final Third

Food or restaurants talked about during this portion:

• Beignets mentioned in context of stopping in New Orleans (01:44:59.323)
• General mention of eating lunch before carjacking (01:36:22.344)
• Tacos and coffee mentioned as items to pass out during Record Store Day line monitoring (02:13:25.457)

News stories talked about during this portion:

• Beggar in Mumbai becomes millionaire (01:33:59.311): A beggar named Jane in Mumbai, India worth over a million dollars through begging and smart investments by his children in shops and a two-bedroom flat. Despite his wealth, he continues begging, viewing it as serving penance and helping others cleanse their souls (01:34:17.148)
• Eight-year-old carjacker in Alabama (01:36:10.926): An 8-year-old boy carjacked a vehicle at gunpoint at 11 AM, led police on a chase, crashed into multiple vehicles, and was charged with carjacking and weapons possession (01:37:04.547 to 01:38:56.213)
• Spanish woman scammed by fake God (01:39:35.297): Elderly woman named Esperanza from León, Spain was scammed out of 300,000 euros over six years by someone claiming to be God calling her. The scammer convinced her she would become a saint and had her deposit money in a convenience store drawer. Prosecution seeking 8 years in prison (01:40:04.186 to 01:42:50.070)

Interesting facts shared during this portion:

• Satsuma is a mandarin orange, the newest Rambler flavor (01:46:59.897)
• Texas State Parks are celebrating their centennial (100 years) (01:49:10.185)
• Many Texas parks were built during the Works Project/Great Depression by young men aged 17-19 (01:49:15.594)
• Aluminum is infinitely recyclable and better for the environment than glass or plastic (01:50:32.362)
• The Porsche 928 “phone dial” wheels were featured in the movie Risky Business with Tom Cruise (01:56:38.618)

Memorable moments during this portion:

• The Great Record Theft (02:02:11.765): Video Oliver admitted to stealing a $200 Lincoln Park box set from the studio, showing no remorse. This sparked an extended segment soliciting listener punishment ideas
• Diaper eating punishment suggestion (02:05:39.382): Caller Chris suggested Oliver should “eat a diaper off of Matt” as punishment, referencing an earlier story about Matt’s diaper being eaten by a goat at a petting zoo as a child
• Discovering Oliver might be a kleptomaniac (02:08:18.120): Discussion revealed Oliver previously “borrowed” Matt’s keys after the Christmas podcast and never properly explained it, raising suspicions about compulsive stealing
• Dave Mead’s Porsche 928 story (01:56:05.432): Detailed discussion of Mead buying his dream car during COVID with custom checkerboard Pasha interior and listening to Van Halen’s “Hot for Teacher” at full volume

Guests on the show:

• Dave Mead from Rambler Sparkling Water (01:44:21.565 to 02:01:52.309): Discussed the company’s partnership with Texas Parks and Wildlife Foundation, new commemorative cans for the parks’ centennial, the Satsuma flavor, expansion across Texas and the country, and his restored 1982 Porsche 928

Callers this portion:

• Chris (02:05:38.022): Suggested Oliver eat a diaper off Matt as punishment
• Connor (02:06:16.940): Suggested bringing in Oliver’s girlfriend to tell embarrassing things about her
• Nolan (02:07:27.016): Suggested taking Oliver “to the gallows” (putting him in stocks)
• Justin (02:08:32.499): Suggested Oliver wear a sign claiming he stole from Lincoln Park at the skate park
• Caden (02:09:17.062): Suggested Oliver return the item, give it away, then pay for it at Piranha Records
• Uber Joe (02:10:54.121): Suggested Oliver only answer with one-word responses when on air
• Multiple callers discussed punishments for Oliver’s theft

Predictions made during this portion:

• Bob predicted Oliver has either pawned the stolen box set or given it as a gift to impress someone, stating if Oliver had it, it would have been returned first thing in the morning (02:09:41.195)

Facts of the Day from their segment:

• Mumbai Beggar Millionaire: Beggar worth over $1 million through investing in shops and real estate, continues begging despite family’s protests (01:34:41.507)
• 8-Year-Old Carjacker: Armed carjacking by 8-year-old in Montgomery, Alabama at 11 AM, led to police chase ending in crash (01:37:04.547)
• God Scam in Spain: Woman scammed out of 300,000 euros over 6 years by man claiming to be God, received letter “written in blood” (01:41:01.854)

Summary

The final third of the show began with the hosts wrapping up a discussion about embarrassing ex-partners, noting the lack of truly wild caller stories. This transitioned into Bob’s “Nods to the Odd” segment featuring three bizarre news stories: a beggar in Mumbai who became a millionaire, an eight-year-old carjacker in Alabama, and an elderly Spanish woman scammed by someone pretending to be God calling on the telephone.

The show’s major focus shifted when guest Dave Mead from Rambler Sparkling Water joined the studio. Mead, who is friends with the hosts through their “fishing crew” (a group that rarely actually fishes), discussed Rambler’s partnership with the Texas Parks and Wildlife Foundation to celebrate the centennial of Texas State Parks. The conversation covered their new commemorative cans exclusive to HEB, the popular Satsuma flavor, and the company’s expansion from a small Austin startup to nationwide distribution with 18 employees. The discussion also touched on environmental considerations, with Rambler using aluminum cans instead of plastic or glass.

A significant portion of the conversation with Mead diverted into his personal passion: a 1982 Porsche 928 he purchased during COVID with the iconic “phone dial” wheels from Risky Business. He detailed the custom checkerboard Pasha interior installed by octogenarian craftsman Leonard Harvey, and shared a memorable moment of listening to Van Halen’s “Hot for Teacher” at full volume with Matt in the restored vehicle. The hosts also discussed Rambler’s involvement with the “Texas Wild” album produced by Walker Lukens, featuring Texas artists covering classic songs to commemorate the state parks’ anniversary, including Fat Tony with Paul Wall covering “Hey Baby Que Paso” and Ryan Bingham covering The Toadies’ “Possum Kingdom.”

The show’s tone shifted dramatically when the hosts revealed that Video Oliver, a young employee who frequently appears on the show, had stolen a $200 Lincoln Park box set from their studio. What made the situation particularly egregious was Oliver’s complete lack of remorse when admitting to the theft. This sparked an extended listener call-in segment soliciting creative punishments, with suggestions ranging from eating a diaper off Matt (referencing an earlier story), wearing embarrassing signs at the skate park, working as a line monitor at Record Store Day in a shirt reading “I’m a vinyl thief,” and only being allowed one-word answers on air. The hosts expressed frustration that they had become too soft after past workplace trauma and needed to reassert boundaries.

The final segment revealed concerning patterns, with the hosts recalling that Oliver had previously taken Matt’s keys after the Christmas podcast without proper explanation, and noting that other valuable items seemed to have gone missing from their prize taboo box. This led to speculation about whether Oliver might be a kleptomaniac with a compulsion he cannot control, though the hosts ultimately decided this didn’t excuse the behavior. The show concluded with promotion for Bob Fonseca’s Rock and Roll Bar Trivia on July 23rd at Moon Tower Saloon, where they demanded Oliver appear, possibly dressed as the Hamburglar, to face public accountability for his actions.