Dudley and Bob with Matt — 93.7 KLBJ-FM, Austin — Thursday, October 6, 2016
This Show
Part 1: TACO STEALER
Dale arrives tired from taking painkillers the previous day but is energized, creating a trivia contest about show history for Daniel and Carissa to win ACL tickets. Bob shares a story about a homeless man stealing his taco at Taco Cabana, which he interprets as a sign that his life is good. The show devolves into an extended, hilarious argument when Dale tries to give Daniel a buy-one-get-one-free pizza coupon, but Daniel insists he would only accept half-off coupons, not understanding they are mathematically identical.
Segments
- Show Open – Dale Sets Up Trivia Contest [00:00:01] — Dale announces he is creating a ‘Who Will Know It, Man’ contest about show history for Daniel and Carissa to compete for the last ACL tickets. He mentions having an interesting day he cannot discuss on air.
- Bob’s Taco Cabana Story [00:03:00] — Bob tells a story about stopping at Taco Cabana where a tweaking homeless man stole one of his tacos, then ate it on a curb in the parking lot. Bob interprets this, along with meeting a fan immediately after, as signs that his life is actually pretty good.
- iPhone Settings Help [00:20:00] — A caller walks the hosts through changing iPhone settings to fix the iOS 10 home button issue. Discussion about accessibility settings and technology frustrations.
- Carissa’s Food Issues [00:22:00] — Carissa discusses being stressed and falling back into eating disorder patterns, alternating between not eating and binging. The hosts try to put things in perspective after Bob’s homeless man story.
- Elderly Couple Separated Story [00:32:00] — Discussion of news story about elderly couple married 65 years being separated into different assisted living facilities due to Medicaid rules. Matt explains it is a misleading headline about levels of care, not government forcing separation.
- Patty Hearst Photoshop [00:36:00] — Dale shows a Photoshop of Carissa as Patty Hearst. Explanation of Stockholm Syndrome and why they call Carissa ‘Patty Hearst’ when she defends Daniel.
- The Great Coupon Debate [00:39:00] — Dale tries to give Daniel a buy-one-get-one-free pizza coupon from Blaze Pizza. Daniel refuses it but says he would accept a half-off coupon, not understanding they are mathematically the same thing. Extended argument ensues with callers chiming in.
Recurring Bits
- Who Will Know It, Man [00:01:26] — Dale creates special edition about Dudley and Bob show history for Daniel and Carissa to compete for ACL tickets
- Fast Food Fanatic [00:39:00] — Segment about Taco Bell Airbnb promotion derails into the coupon debate
Callers
- unnamed [00:20:00] — iPhone settings help for iOS 10 home button issue Successfully walked hosts through accessibility settings to fix the problem
- Billy (regular) [00:23:48] — Called in with obsessive repetitive speech pattern Dale identifies it as a form of OCD, Billy repeats phrases multiple times
- unnamed [00:48:20] — Referenced the pizza slices video about girlfriend wanting 12 slices instead of 8 Quick comment comparing to Daniel’s coupon logic
- Rita [00:49:00] — Identified the pizza place as Blaze Pizza, said she got the same coupon Provided the answer Dale was looking for, joked about dropping off coupon
- unnamed [00:49:15] — Called to say they were ‘absolutely dead’ over the BOGO vs half-off math debate Referenced Daniel taking a steak dinner home previously, highlighting the contradiction in his logic
Quotes
I had contempt for him, but if I’d had a 20 in my pocket, I probably would have thrown it at him.
Bob Fonseca [00:03:51]
I could try to squeeze into an XL from Mighty Swell.
Dale Dudley [00:10:00]
I realized yesterday when you didn’t know what Aleppo was that you’re not smart.
Dale Dudley [00:22:00]
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, make it jiggle, jiggle, jiggle. It’s your left boob.
Dale Dudley [00:26:00]
I don’t like BOGOs, I like free money. End of story.
Daniel Gallo [00:45:03]
Part 2: Clown Clown Clowns
The crew spends much of this segment debating a BOGO pizza coupon vs. a gift card with Daniel (displaying his ‘literal man’ logic struggles), then shifts to ranting about hospital billing practices and short-term rental regulations in Austin. The final third is dominated by mocking local news coverage of ‘creepy clown sightings’ across Central Texas, which Dale calls media hysteria. Jim Bakker’s apocalypse food buckets also get ridiculed.
Segments
- Pizza Coupon Logic with Daniel [00:00:00] — Dale offers Daniel a BOGO pizza coupon; Daniel struggles to decide if he’d prefer it or a $5 gift card on a $10 pizza, leading to extended comedic confusion.
- Post Office Theft Suspicions [00:04:18] — Dale describes catching people breaking into the post office’s spam bins and pulling mail out, suspects a scam.
- Hospital Billing Rant [00:12:34] — Dale tells the story of his wife’s $14,000 emergency room bill for a stomach virus, his on-air war with the hospital, and how he refused to pay.
- Short-Term Rental Debate [00:17:20] — Dale agrees with Ken Paxton’s lawsuit against Austin’s short-term rental regulations, argues the city council is overreaching and harming small investors.
- Jim Bakker’s Apocalypse Food Pitch [00:31:00] — The crew mocks Jim Bakker’s TV segments tying Hillary Clinton’s 9/11 collapse to the apocalypse and pushing emergency food buckets and generators.
- Dale Gets a Call from His Doctor [00:46:40] — Dale’s doctor’s office calls on-air to schedule a follow-up; Dale jokes about dying and elevated estrogen.
- Clown Sightings Hysteria Begins [00:48:06] — Dale introduces the ‘creepy clown’ sightings sweeping Central Texas and blasts local TV news for treating it as top news.
- Fox 7 Clown Coverage [00:50:51] — The crew plays and mocks Fox 7’s breathless coverage of a clown spotted near a bus stop in Manor, calling it media hysteria.
- Caller: Clown Invasion Prep at School [00:56:56] — A caller reports that Farley Middle School in Hutto is patrolling for clowns and students are ‘prepping for a clown invasion’ on Friday.
Recurring Bits
- Fast Food Fanatic [00:00:18] — Dale mentions they were in the middle of Fast Food Fanatic when the pizza coupon debate derailed the segment.
Callers
- unnamed [00:30:33] — Mockingly asked when ‘Amanda’s Rub and Tug’ would open Hung up after leaving the joke; Dale and crew dismiss it as an unfunny callback.
- unnamed [00:43:33] — Asked for info on the comedy cruise Dale gives contact number; smooth interaction.
- unnamed [00:43:50] — Defends Jim Bakker with jokes about thermite in Hillary’s lungs Dale laughs, appreciates the long setup, thanks caller.
- unnamed (Hutto) [00:56:56] — Reports Farley Middle School is patrolling for clowns and students are prepping for ‘clown invasion’ Dale uses it to further mock the clown panic; caller taken seriously.
Quotes
I’m not paying you anything. I’m going to hammer you on the air every single day.
Dale Dudley [00:12:34]
It’s called Vagrant Masturbation Hut. That’s where vagrants go to see their porn.
Dale Dudley [00:30:03]
If I snap, I promise not to kill innocents. I will hunt down charlatan preachers.
Dale Dudley [00:39:15]
Topping our local news tonight… we have murders, a corrupt attorney general, and Rebecca Thomas’s boobs.
Dale Dudley [00:51:02]
I urge everyone who owns a costume to go stand in the woods and keep the news people going.
Dale Dudley [00:55:34]
Part 3: KNOW YOUR MORNING SHOW
The show wraps up with the ‘Who Will Know It, Man’ contest, testing Daniel and Carissa’s knowledge of show history for ACL tickets. Dale expresses frustration with the pace and flow of the show. A listener named Greg brings cookies and a projector for Bob, triggering a long segment of cookie discussion and Dale eating multiple packages. The show ends with Dale and Bob talking about their diets (or lack thereof) heading into ACL.
Segments
- Show Flow Frustrations [00:00:10] — Dale expresses frustration about the show’s pacing and having to deal with behind-the-scenes issues while trying to maintain the show’s rhythm.
- Who Will Know It, Man Contest Setup [00:05:46] — Dale introduces the trivia contest testing Daniel and Carissa’s knowledge of Dudley and Bob show history, with ACL tickets as prizes.
- Contest: Producer Names [00:07:04] — First question asks contestants to name the three producers before Daniel and Carissa. Daniel correctly names Angela, Yeti, and Brother Haz.
- Contest: Dale’s Parents [00:09:47] — Both Daniel and Carissa correctly answer that Dale’s parents were named Gene (G-E-N-E) and Jean (J-E-A-N).
- Contest: Z Rock Wheelchair Story [00:10:53] — Question about a false rumor Z Rock spread about Dale’s brother. Both contestants get variations of the correct answer.
- Contest: Bob’s Taco Thief [00:12:00] — Both Daniel and Carissa correctly identify a grackle as the animal that stole Bob’s taco.
- Contest: Audience of One Gone Bad [00:12:57] — Question about times the Audience of One promotion went wrong. Daniel gets it right with examples including the teddy bear incident and ‘Bob’s tired.’
- Contest: Pre-Bob Show Name [00:14:51] — Neither contestant correctly identifies ‘The Morning Show with Dale Clark’ as the name before Bob joined.
- Contest Winner and Additional Questions [00:16:20] — Mark wins the contest. The hosts play out the remaining questions about Cecil the first heckler and Ted Smith’s ‘bloody hot coffee’ quote.
- Daniel’s Prank Call – Tradeo [00:19:44] — Daniel plays his prank phone call recording featuring fake Tradeo callers listing pornographic movie titles and dealing with prank callers.
- Quarry Discussion and Parallel Parking [00:22:01] — Bob and Matt discuss the show Quarry and Bob’s son taking his driving test, including Bob’s parallel parking skills.
- Francisco Santos Update [00:24:13] — Dale announces that Francisco Santos, whom they were trying to help, has passed away, urging continued support for his family through GoFundMe.
- Breaking and Entering Promotion Planning [00:24:39] — Dale discusses the upcoming Breaking and Entering holiday promotion, criticizing the exploitative nature of traditional radio charity promotions.
- Rush Limbaugh Criticism [00:25:46] — Dale criticizes Rush Limbaugh for talking politics with children on his show and giving them gifts, creating tension with his KLBJ AM bosses.
- Bill O’Reilly Chinatown Segment [00:30:02] — The hosts watch and discuss a controversial Jesse Watters segment from Fox News featuring him in Chinatown, debating whether it’s racist or just mean-spirited.
- Aurora Indiana Trump/Clinton Float [00:35:08] — News story about a controversial parade float in Aurora, Indiana depicting Hillary Clinton in an electric chair with a blackface Obama head.
- Greg’s Gifts Arrive [00:37:34] — Listener Greg brings cookies and a 16mm projector for Bob, though Bob doesn’t need that type of projector for his super-8 films.
- Trump Terminally Ill Voter Plea [00:40:11] — The hosts play audio of Trump asking terminally ill people to hang on until November 8th to vote for him.
- Cookie Feast Begins [00:43:52] — Dale begins eating extensively from the cookie packages Greg brought, despite protests from Bob and the crew about saving them for the podcast.
- Vibe Device Commercial [00:46:15] — Discussion and commercial for a vibrator that syncs with romantic novels, activating during sexy passages.
- Cookie Consumption Escalates [00:48:42] — Dale continues eating cookies at an alarming rate, finishing entire packages while the crew tries unsuccessfully to stop him.
- Show Wrap-Up [00:52:56] — Dale and Bob discuss their lack of diet discipline heading into ACL, with Dale admitting he’s blowing off health goals until after the festival.
Recurring Bits
- Who Will Know It, Man [00:05:46] — Trivia contest testing Daniel and Carissa’s knowledge of show history for ACL tickets. Mark wins by correctly predicting which producer knew which answers.
- Audience of One [00:12:57] — Referenced in contest question about times the promotion went bad, including the teddy bear incident, ‘Bob’s tired’ comment, and accusation about Bob and an ex-wife.
- The Sideshow [00:43:52] — Mentioned multiple times as Bob and crew try to save cookies for the podcast, with Bob saying he won’t do the Sideshow if they eat all the cookies.
Callers
- unnamed [00:00:44] — Called for contest tickets but cursed on air Dale refused to let them win because they cursed on the air
- Eric [00:07:04] — Who Will Know It, Man contest Lost to Mark but received a Mighty Swell ACL survival package as consolation
- Mark [00:07:44] — Who Will Know It, Man contest Won ACL tickets by correctly predicting which answers Daniel and Carissa would know
Quotes
The situation is what the situation’s going to be.
Dale Dudley [00:18:37]
You need a cursing screaming Dale Dudley on that station.
Dale Dudley [00:25:02]
I don’t care if the doctor gave you the worst prognosis. Hang out till November 8th.
Donald Trump (audio) [00:41:17]