Dudley and Bob with Matt — 93.7 KLBJ-FM, Austin — Wednesday, January 4, 2017
This Show
Part 1: Get Well, Charlie Manson
The show opens with the cast discussing various topics including Bob finding unclaimed money from the state comptroller, Dale’s Christmas presents from his wife, and a lengthy debate about whether prisoners (specifically Charles Manson, who was just hospitalized) should receive medical care. The conversation spirals into discussions about prison reform, death row versus ‘life row,’ and Edison electrocuting an elephant. Dale also mentions his year-end charitable donations to organizations like the ACLU and Southern Poverty Law Center.
Segments
- Show Open [00:00:09] — Standard show introduction with cast credits and opening voice-over.
- Unclaimed Money Discussion [00:04:19] — Bob announces he received notification from the state comptroller about $1,100 in unclaimed money owed to him and encourages listeners to check claimittexas.org.
- Dale’s Brother and Cousin’s Money [00:05:47] — Dale discusses his deceased brother’s unclaimed money that his ex-wife won’t claim, and mentions his cousin who lost his wife during a colonoscopy.
- Musical Guests Discussion [00:08:38] — Dale mentions running into Dale Watson and Ray Benson who may come on the show to play music from their new album.
- Christmas Gift Recap [00:10:38] — Dale reflects on how his wife’s Christmas gifts to him were actually for her, referencing yesterday’s show discussion.
- Hate Mail Discussion [00:13:20] — Dale discusses a letter from a listener accusing him of not doing ‘critical thinking’ and pushing fake news, sourced from Breitbart.
- Robert E. Lee Ancestry Update [00:17:39] — Dale’s sister researched the family tree and found he’s likely NOT related to Robert E. Lee, but possibly descended from a Culpeper Minuteman instead.
- Charles Manson Hospitalized [00:21:31] — The cast discusses news that Charles Manson, age 82, has been hospitalized, leading to a debate about whether prisoners deserve medical care.
- Prisoner Medical Care Debate [00:22:34] — Extended discussion about whether prisoners, especially serial killers, should receive state-funded medical care. Daniel initially questions it, Bob and Matt explain the constitutional and practical reasons why they must.
- ‘Life Row’ Malapropism [00:29:00] — Carissa says Manson is on ‘life row’ instead of ‘death row,’ creating a running joke for the show.
- Year-End Charitable Donations [00:33:58] — Dale lists the charitable donations he made at year-end, including ACLU, Ronald McDonald House, and Southern Poverty Law Center.
- Edison and the Elephant [00:35:59] — Discussion about Thomas Edison electrocuting an elephant to demonstrate the dangers of AC versus DC electricity.
- Last Diet ATX Promo [00:43:16] — Dale promotes Last Diet ATX and mentions he started the diet again yesterday.
- Rain Man Reference [00:45:38] — Dale mentions his wife watched Rain Man for the first time, joking that now she understands Daniel better.
- Yellowstone Murder Zone [00:48:20] — Daniel discusses a legal loophole in Yellowstone National Park where a portion falls under conflicting jurisdictions, theoretically making prosecution impossible.
- Show Tease [00:50:47] — Dale teases upcoming segments about a $2,000 mistake he made and Matt’s travel story with dogs.
Quotes
Death really only takes the good people, doesn’t it?
Dale Dudley [00:21:54]
Thousands of people dying of death things like this.
Carissa Jade [00:27:21]
He’s on life row. Down on life row.
Carissa Jade [00:29:02]
Part 2: Dale and Ray
Dale and the crew tried to play Daniel’s prank phone calls but got sidetracked by production confusion and Dale’s ongoing communication frustrations with Daniel. Ray Benson and Dale Watson arrived early for an in-studio performance, playing songs from their new collaborative album ‘Dale and Ray’ and recording a version of the show’s ‘San Antonio’ bit. The segment also included discussion of 1970s chokers for men and the whitewashing of Black rock and roll artists.
Segments
- Production Confusion and Daniel Communication Issues [00:00:02] — Dale and Daniel argue about communication methods after Dale didn’t know Daniel had prepared prank phone calls. Dale insists Daniel should text or email him about content, not just put it on the prep sheet.
- Ray Benson and Dale Watson Arrive Early [00:08:19] — Ray Benson and Dale Watson show up in the studio earlier than expected. Dale mentions seeing them at the AM station and jokes about their visit.
- Daniel’s Pineapple Pen Prank Calls [00:08:48] — Daniel plays two prank phone calls to swap shop/tradio shows based on the viral ‘Pen Pineapple Apple Pen’ song. The second host gets increasingly frustrated and threatens to report the caller to police.
- Dale and Ray Album Discussion [00:18:59] — Ray and Dale discuss their new collaborative album with 10 original songs (plus one Willie Nelson cover). They explain they’ve been talking about doing this project for years before finally recording it.
- Live Performance: ‘Ballad of Dale and Ray’ [00:22:54] — Ray Benson and Dale Watson perform the title track from their album live in-studio, a humorous song about two country singers from ‘Bedsore, Texas’ who like beer and pot.
- Live Performance: ‘Feeling Haggard’ [00:26:32] — Ray and Dale perform their tribute song to Merle Haggard, written after his death. The emotional song references Haggard’s classics and his impact on country music.
- San Antonio Song Recording [00:31:26] — Dale asks Ray and Dale Watson to record their version of the show’s recurring ‘San Antonio’ bit (originally sung by a stripper). They perform it live with guitars.
- Post-Performance Delight [00:38:55] — After the guests leave, the crew discusses how great the segment was and how relaxed and professional Ray and Dale were compared to typical guests.
- 1970s Chokers for Men Discussion [00:41:44] — Dale sees an article about men’s chokers coming back and remembers wearing pleather chokers and fringe vests as a kid in the 1970s. The crew debates whether this was real or Dale’s false memory.
- The Osmonds as Cultural Appropriation [00:48:52] — Dale explains how the Osmonds were created as a white alternative to the Jackson 5, similar to how Pat Boone covered Little Richard songs. He plays clips comparing Little Richard’s ‘Tutti Frutti’ to Pat Boone’s sanitized version.
Guests
- Ray Benson (musician) [00:08:19] — Leader of Asleep at the Wheel, multi-Grammy winner, in to promote Dale and Ray album with live performance
- Dale Watson (musician) [00:08:19] — Country/rockabilly artist, in to promote Dale and Ray album with live performance and to discuss driving Ray’s tour bus
Callers
- unnamed (Florida (grew up there)) [00:50:13] — Remembered wearing Puka shell chokers in Florida in the 1970s, references seeing them on ‘That 70s Show’ Brief contribution to the choker fashion discussion
Text Line
- [00:48:32] Matt’s sister texted that Kris Kristofferson also wore chokers — read by Matt Bearden Added to the ongoing discussion about 1970s men’s fashion
Music
- Ray Benson and Dale Watson — Performed ‘Ballad of Dale and Ray’ live in-studio
- Ray Benson and Dale Watson — Performed ‘Feeling Haggard’ (Merle Haggard tribute) live in-studio
- Ray Benson and Dale Watson — Performed their version of the show’s ‘San Antonio’ song
- Little Richard — Archival clip of ‘Tutti Frutti’ played to demonstrate original version
- Pat Boone — Archival clip of sanitized ‘Tutti Frutti’ cover played to demonstrate whitewashing of Black music
- The Osmonds — Flip Wilson show performance discussed and video played showing them as white alternative to Jackson 5
Quotes
Communication. All you have to do is pick up the phone.
Dale Dudley [00:01:57]
I’m not angry. I’m just asking you to communicate on several platforms.
Dale Dudley [00:25:00]
That has to be one of my favorite segments we’ve ever done on the radio.
Dale Dudley [00:38:55]
White radio said do we have any white kids that can do the same thing?
Dale Dudley [00:52:02]
Part 2: Dudley & Bob + Matt
The segment opens with Pop Cop delivering celebrity news jokes, then Dale discusses needing a dental implant after his previous dentist (his ex-brother-in-law) retired, leading to extensive ‘bone in your mouth’ innuendo. The show spirals into caller discussions about millennials lacking survival skills, then Matt tells a long story about encountering poorly-behaved ‘service dogs’ during his holiday travel – one throwing up in a brewery, another being an 80-pound pit bull on a plane. The hosts debate the proliferation of fake service dogs and entitled dog owners bringing animals everywhere.
Segments
- Water Request and Dental Woes Setup [00:00:00] — Dale requests listeners bring water to the station in exchange for business mentions, then begins teasing a story about losing $2,000 due to laziness related to his dental work.
- Pop Cop [00:00:44] — Matt performs Pop Cop celebrity news segment covering Megyn Kelly’s move to NBC, Will & Grace revival, Hillary Clinton attending inauguration, congressional ethics vote, Queen Elizabeth’s cold, IBM robots for seniors, Ronda Rousey, Detroit mummy corpse, and Vatican McDonald’s.
- Inappropriate Harmonizer Guy Debut [00:05:00] — Someone debuts a harmonizer toy/effect that turns statements inappropriate or silly, leading to extended ‘bone’ double entendres when Dale tries to explain his dental implant situation.
- The Big Sweep – Dale’s Dental Saga [00:07:29] — Dale explains his multi-year dental problems: failed root canal, abscess, bone grafts, implant failure, trip to ex-brother-in-law oral surgeon in West Texas who has now retired, leaving Dale needing someone to complete the work for free.
- Corporate Healthcare Frustrations [00:15:03] — Dale vents about Cast Light healthcare search requirements and mandatory CBS copyright training, revealing station policy that second copyright violation results in immediate termination.
- Matt’s Blue Ceiling Home Reference [00:20:00] — Brief callback to Matt’s home that Dale visited unannounced, and discussion of ridiculous downtown Austin real estate prices.
- Millennial Survival Skills [00:21:21] — Dale reads UK study showing millennials lack basic survival skills like map-reading, knot-tying, and fire-starting. Discussion of whether these skills still matter in the smartphone era.
- Dog Attacks Owner Over Sweater [00:28:33] — Discussion of news story where pit bull named Scarface mauled owners when they tried to put a sweater on him. Daniel suggests snapping the dog’s back leg as proper response.
- Matt’s Service Dog Travel Story – Part 1 [00:32:58] — Matt begins elaborate story about holiday travel from Milwaukee through Chicago with flight delays and car service complications, setting up his encounter with questionable service dogs.
- 80-Pound Pit Bull on Plane [00:37:00] — Matt describes seeing woman with massive pit bull on her lap on flight to Austin. Flight attendants discuss it in panic but allow it. Dog and owner were well-behaved despite the shocking size.
- The Milwaukee Brewery Incident [00:38:14] — Matt’s main story: woman with ‘diabetes service dog’ (French bulldog) arrives at brewery. Dog begs for food, gets fed cheese curds, vomits on floor, owner doesn’t clean it up. Couple parks in loading zone claiming ‘it’s lunchtime,’ dog bothers other customers, then urinates on floor as supposed ‘diabetic alert.’
- Service Dog Culture Discussion [00:45:34] — Extended debate about proliferation of fake service dogs, entitled owners, inability of businesses to challenge them, and whether dog culture has gone too far. Bob reveals he’s returned two dogs to breeders.
- Phone Calls on Dog Culture [00:50:51] — Damien calls about ‘bring your dog to work Fridays’ at his office. Another caller reports Macy’s employees actively encouraging shoppers to bring dogs into the store.
- Nile Maxwell Promo [00:51:09] — Bob delivers Ram truck promotion for Nile Maxwell Supercenter’s ‘Start Something New’ sales event.
- Lost Dog Harmonizer Bit [00:56:56] — Caller suggests using harmonizer for lost dog announcements. Harmonizer person performs ‘Snakes on a Plane’ parody about ‘Monday to Friday’ plane.
Recurring Bits
- Pop Cop [00:00:44] — Matt performs celebrity news segment with political jokes, including Megyn Kelly/NBC, Will & Grace revival, Hillary at inauguration, Queen Elizabeth’s cold, and Vatican McDonald’s
- The Worst of Dudley and Bob [00:00:44] — Pop Cop jokingly references this as the new direction for radio
Callers
- unnamed (IT worker) [00:26:43] — Challenged Dale’s claim that people over 50 can back up their computers, saying the average person over 50 cannot Dale dismissed him after making a crude joke about ‘teeing balls in your mouth,’ caller hung up
- Damien [00:52:41] — His workplace has ‘bring your dog to work Fridays’ and he gets dogs’ noses in his crotch every week, notices entitled attitude of dog owners Given tickets to Chicago/Doobie Brothers concert for being the only caller to participate
- unnamed (female) [00:54:34] — Macy’s employee actively encouraged her to bring her dog into the store Brief call supporting the entitled dog owner discussion
- unnamed [00:57:11] — Suggested using harmonizer for lost dog announcements Dale shut him down, saying ‘you don’t tell a genius how to operate’
Quotes
He said the implant wasn’t long enough. It didn’t go deep enough in my mouth.
Dale Dudley [00:09:03]
There’s no such thing as Christmas. It’s really just a day.
Dale Dudley [00:12:32]
First copyright violation, stern warning. Second time, they fire you, no questions asked.
Dale Dudley [00:15:50]
He’s supposed to snap the hind leg, but whatever.
Daniel Gallo [00:28:02]
It’s like making a fake handicap placard to park closer to the mall.
Matt Bearden [00:42:05]
Part 3: City Improvements
The show continues with wide-ranging conversation including discussion of the Austin city seal and its ‘lamp of knowledge,’ debate over Waller Creek revitalization plans, and a Dallas HR director suing to find out who sent her gummy penises. Daniel obsesses over the Austin emblem and geographical questions about cities on state borders, while the hosts tease him relentlessly about not understanding ancient lamps and basic geography.
Segments
- Bob and Kendra Scott history [00:00:00] — Dale reveals Bob once dated Kendra Scott (now a billionaire jewelry designer) and sent her flowers weekly. Bob eventually ended up with his current wife, who also knew Kendra Scott.
- Slash My Payments sponsor read [00:18:00] — Dale does a live read for auto loan refinancing service, explaining interest rate reductions to listeners.
- Kids’ viral videos [00:19:15] — Dale shows the crew videos his kids love, including the ‘Speak Out’ game where someone’s dentures fly out, and the viral ‘Pen Pineapple Apple Pen’ song with 29 million views.
- Comedy cruise promotion [00:26:00] — Dale promotes the Dudley and Bob Comedy Cruise on Royal Caribbean, August 6-13, featuring Jimmy Roulette and Mike McRae.
- Waller Creek revitalization plans [00:33:00] — Dale plays KXAN news about Mayor Adler’s proposal to revitalize Waller Creek with $220 million in bonds and philanthropic funding. Dale is skeptical, noting similar promises over his 30 years in Austin.
- Antiques Roadshow mistake [00:43:00] — Dale discusses how PBS Antiques Roadshow valued a high school art project from 1970 at $50,000, thinking it was from the late 19th/early 20th century. The student who made it contacted the show.
- Dallas gummy penis lawsuit [00:44:00] — Dale covers a Dallas HR director suing to find out who sent her gummy penises, which may be connected to other harassment including her car being keyed.
- Nixon and Vietnam [00:45:00] — Dale discusses new revelations from Haldeman’s notes showing Nixon deliberately delayed Vietnam peace talks in 1968 to help his election chances against Humphrey, extending the war years longer.
- Daniel and the Austin city seal [00:49:00] — Daniel becomes obsessed with understanding the lamp on the Austin city seal. The crew explains it’s a ‘lamp of knowledge,’ but Daniel thinks it looks like a genie bottle. This leads to extended debate about ancient lamps, lanterns, and lighting.
- Geography questions [01:03:00] — Daniel has questions about whether St. Louis exists in both Missouri and Illinois like Kansas City exists in both Kansas and Missouri. The crew explains there’s St. Louis, Missouri and East St. Louis, Illinois.
Guests
- Peter Mullen (other) [00:36:00] — Waller Creek Conservancy representative featured in KXAN news clip supporting the revitalization plan
Callers
- unnamed [00:40:51] — BBVA Compass bank calling for ‘Eugene Dudley’ Dale told them he does a radio show and asked them to call back after 11am
- Chris [00:59:19] — Explained the lamp on the Austin seal is called the ‘lamp of knowledge’ in educational terms Helped explain the symbolism to Daniel
- Nick [01:00:11] — Explained about lamplighters who used to walk around at dusk lighting gas lamps Provided historical context about street lighting
- unnamed [00:51:28] — Offered to let Daniel work on his yard that needs help Teased Daniel about his suburban yard obsession
Quotes
I had the same issue when I used to date Estee Lauder
Dale Dudley [00:14:00]
For those 30 years, every couple years, I hear how great the Waller Creek makeover is gonna be
Dale Dudley [00:34:00]
Urine Creek, also known as Waller Creek… fresh homeless urine
Dale Dudley [00:35:00]
Why is there a genie bottle on the Austin Emblem?
Daniel Gallo [00:53:00]