Dudley and Bob with Matt — 93.7 KLBJ-FM, Austin — Friday, January 13, 2017
This Show
Part 1: Travel Tips
The hosts spend the entire segment giving Daniel Gallo increasingly dire warnings about his upcoming Mexico vacation, ranging from genuine safety concerns to absurdist comedy. The conversation reveals Daniel is staying at a timeshare with his wife’s parents, will be renting a car to drive around, and in a shocking final reveal, may have to sleep in the same room as his in-laws with men and women separated. Dale admits his Mexico anxiety stems partly from his father’s racist warnings from childhood. The segment includes multiple callers with Mexico experiences and extensive discussion of vehicle inspections, bowling, and putt-putt.
Segments
- Show open and wine hangover [00:00:04] — Standard show open. Dale admits to drinking two bottles of wine the night before and feeling the effects. Discussion of car trouble for Matt.
- Registration and H-E-B bickering [00:02:32] — Dale and Bob have an old-married-couple argument about whether to renew vehicle registration online or at H-E-B customer service.
- Bowling memories and Bob’s two balls [00:04:45] — Conversation about bowling triggered by Dale’s thumb injury from the Christmas party. Bob reveals he owns two bowling balls. Dale recalls winning a trophy for most improved average as a child.
- Putt-putt for money [00:09:00] — Dale tells the story of playing putt-putt golf for money as a teenager, staying out until dawn, and his mother accusing him of doing drugs when he was actually just putting.
- Terry’s Burnet Road inspection plug [00:11:08] — Extended endorsement of Terry’s inspection service. Dale describes getting lost finding it despite going there for decades, mentions Dale Watson was just there, and praises Terry as a good local guy who helps musicians.
- Ricky Williams teaser [00:12:30] — Dale mentions Ricky Williams will be on the show next week to discuss something that happened in Tyler, Texas involving Earl Campbell.
- Best of shows on MLK Day [00:14:09] — Daniel discusses the Best Of shows airing on Monday, including Budapest 2013, bedclothes story, and Mr. Bandana Pants and Aunt Flo go to Mexico.
- Daniel’s Mexico trip revelation [00:16:17] — Daniel casually mentions he’s going to Mexico next week, staying at a timeshare, which launches the main segment. Dale immediately begins expressing concern.
- Dale’s international travel history and culture shock [00:17:00] — Dale recounts his first international trip to Amsterdam via Brussels, being so scared in Brussels he didn’t even get off the train, and admits Mexico is the only place where he still feels uncomfortable.
- The gauntlet at Cancun airport [00:18:20] — Dale describes the aggressive timeshare salespeople at Mexican airports and the importance of not making eye contact until you find your actual car service.
- Resort security and beach access [00:19:40] — Discussion of the multiple security perimeters with machine guns at Mexican resorts, and the fact that beaches can’t be private in Mexico so people could theoretically approach from the water.
- Daniel’s rental car plan [00:20:13] — Daniel reveals they’re renting cars and driving around, which escalates the hosts’ concerns dramatically.
- Matt’s travel advice vs. Dale’s fears [00:20:40] — Matt argues Americans get targeted because they look nervous and suggests Daniel will be fine. Dale and Bob continue warning him about police corruption and not leaving the compound.
- The ‘matarme’ joke [00:22:00] — Matt tells Daniel to practice saying ‘matarme’ (kill me) with his hands up, claiming it will keep him safe. This becomes a running joke.
- Government doesn’t negotiate with kidnappers [00:24:30] — Dale warns Daniel that the U.S. government doesn’t negotiate with kidnappers, so he’ll have to try to escape on his own.
- The UT student and Santeria [00:25:03] — Dale brings up the late-80s case of the UT student who was killed in Mexico for Santeria ritual, only his spine found in a bucket.
- Joe King Carrasco recommendation [00:26:00] — The hosts suggest Daniel contact Joe King Carrasco, who lives in Puerto Vallarta and owns a bar there, for protection and guidance.
- Dale’s racist father and Mexico memories [00:27:00] — Dale explains much of his Mexico fear comes from his father’s warnings about dog-meat tacos and teaching him to racially slur vendors to get better prices in Juarez.
- Caller Manny – matarme correction [00:29:00] — Manny calls to explain ‘matarme’ actually means ‘kill me,’ which everyone already knew. Dale asks if he understands humor.
- Caller Oscar – don’t go to Mexico [00:29:31] — Oscar from the Valley says their rule of thumb was to not go to Mexico, and suggests Daniel should ‘stop being a white guy.’
- Reading TripAdvisor reviews [00:32:45] — The hosts look up Daniel’s resort on TripAdvisor and find mostly positive reviews, with complaints mostly about timeshare sales pressure.
- Comparing Mexico to Chicago crime [00:33:20] — Matt points out Bob gets nervous about resort Mexico but wasn’t worried about Chicago, which has higher murder rates in certain areas.
- Caller Kathy – Acapulco doctor story [00:34:24] — Kathy shares a story from 30 years ago about getting sick in Acapulco, having a doctor come to the hotel who then asked her out.
- Caller Joe – wife’s mother from Durango [00:36:17] — Joe tells story of his wife almost being taken off a bus by the Army, saved only because her uncle paid them off.
- Reviewing Bob’s resort [00:37:00] — They look up Bob’s February resort, which has 4.5 stars from 9,500 reviews and looks spectacular.
- Sky Zoo Guadalajara [00:39:35] — Matt finds a zoo in Guadalajara where visitors ride in gondolas over the animal exhibits. Given Daniel’s fear of gondolas, this becomes another source of comedy.
- Caller Ronnie – Mexico is beautiful [00:41:00] — Ronnie calls to defend Mexico as beautiful, though Dale immediately identifies him as Hispanic by voice alone, which launches a brief sidebar.
- Caller Josh – drives rich people around Acapulco [00:42:36] — Josh reveals he goes to Acapulco twice monthly as a ‘glorified chauffeur’ for wealthy tech people who own houses there.
- Bob’s free all-inclusive resort reveal [00:44:20] — Bob reveals his wife’s company is paying for their entire all-inclusive resort trip, including airfare, which makes everyone jealous.
- Daniel’s sleeping arrangement bombshell [00:47:00] — In the final minutes, Daniel reveals he’s sharing a suite with his wife’s parents, and sometimes men have to sleep separately from women, meaning he may have to sleep in the same bed as his father-in-law.
- Dr. Wang and the Asian way [00:49:29] — Dale caps the segment by telling a story about his cardiologist Dr. Stanley Huang refusing to fly business class to Australia despite being wealthy, explaining ‘it’s not the Asian way,’ connecting to Daniel’s in-law situation.
Callers
- Manny [00:29:00] — Called to explain ‘matarme’ means ‘to kill me’ Dale sarcastically asked if he knows what humor is, as everyone already knew what it meant
- Oscar (The Valley (Rio Grande Valley)) [00:29:31] — Mexico safety – rule of thumb was not to go to Mexico Contributed to the overall warning chorus, suggested Daniel should ‘stop being a white guy’
- Gene [00:31:45] — Mexico safety concerns, sounded groggy or sick Dale thought he might be David Cole at first, Gene said he had a sinus thing
- Kathy [00:34:24] — Acapulco story from 30 years ago – got sick, doctor asked her out Shared a quick anecdote about machine guns on beach even then and mariachis playing Elvis songs
- Joe [00:36:17] — Wife’s experience in Durango – nearly taken off bus by Army Another cautionary tale about corruption and danger
- Ronnie [00:41:00] — Called to say Mexico is beautiful, provide counter-perspective Led to Dale discussing how he can identify ethnicities by voice on the phone, which he demonstrated by immediately knowing Ronnie was Hispanic
- Josh [00:42:36] — Goes to Acapulco twice monthly as chauffeur for wealthy people Revealed he drives rich tech people around when they get drunk at their Mexican houses, everyone envied his arrangement
Quotes
I’ve already hit a vein. That vein of gold is Daniel Gallo.
Dale Dudley [00:01:38]
Woman, why would I go to H-E-B if I could do it right here?
Dale Dudley [00:04:05]
I thought I’d won the Olympics. Most improved average.
Dale Dudley [00:08:10]
I was so scared I stayed on the train and went back to the airport.
Dale Dudley [00:18:06]
We’re in the compound. Thank God we’re here.
Dale Dudley [00:20:05]
The U.S. government does not negotiate with kidnappers.
Dale Dudley [00:24:02]
He goes, dude, it’s not the Asian way. We don’t spend money.
Dale Dudley [00:49:50]
Part 2: Don’t Call Us
Dale delivers an impassioned rant about press freedom after a Texas congressman calls for a CNN reporter to be fired for asking Trump tough questions. The segment becomes heated when caller Hunter defends Trump, leading to a tense back-and-forth. PopCop delivers his news comedy bit, and there’s discussion of a Leander home invasion scare, IKEA shopping age limits, and an extended animal cavalcade featuring dogs rescued from a South Korean meat farm.
Segments
- Comedy Cruise Promo and Opening [00:00:01] — Dale promotes the August comedy cruise with Paradise Vacation Travel, joking about Daniel sleeping in the same room as his in-laws during his Mexico trip.
- PopCop Friday the 13th Edition [00:01:15] — Matt performs PopCop, delivering news jokes about Friday the 13th, marijuana studies, Trump’s press conference, the Chargers moving to LA, Prince’s gold coins, and Taco Bell’s fried chicken taco shell.
- Leander Home Invasion Warning [00:07:53] — Dale issues a serious warning about aggressive door-to-door salespeople in Crystal Falls/Leander area. A teenager encountered a man trying to sell cleaner, later found him peering in windows, then four men returned in a white Dodge Ram (license DWD 7417) to harass him.
- Canadian Parliament Fart Controversy [00:13:50] — Dale plays audio of Michelle Rempel in Canadian Parliament saying Alberta is treated ‘like a fart in the room’ and being asked to withdraw the unparliamentary language.
- Bruce Springsteen Tribute Band Backlash [00:17:17] — Discussion of the B Street Band (Bruce Springsteen cover band) facing backlash for playing Trump’s inauguration party. The band defends it as ‘just a New Jersey party’ not a political statement.
- IKEA Age Limit Study [00:19:04] — Discussion of a study showing people stop shopping at IKEA around age 34. Cast debates whether this makes sense and shares IKEA shopping habits.
- Animal Cavalcade [00:21:58] — Extended segment featuring: dog chained to cage on I-95, puppy baby talk study, cats arguing over milk, dogs rescued from South Korean meat farm, camera-shy praying mantis, and horse with squeaky toy.
- Penny Discussion and 300,000 Pennies [00:36:07] — Callback to ongoing penny debate with Daniel. Story about man who brought 300,000 pennies to Virginia DMV. Carissa struggles with the math conversion.
- Texas Congressman Calls for CNN Reporter to Be Fired [00:40:39] — Dale’s passionate rant about Texas congressman Randy Weber saying CNN reporter Jim Acosta should be fired for asking Trump questions at press conference. Dale argues this threatens press freedom and the First Amendment.
- Heated Caller Argument with Hunter [00:49:05] — Caller Hunter defends Trump, leading to intense back-and-forth with Dale about press freedom, fake news vs. journalism, and Trump’s behavior. Hunter cannot provide specific examples when challenged.
- Caller Sean Supports Dale [00:58:04] — Caller Sean thanks Dale for the tirade, says he’s earned his respect. Dale explains he gets passionate but doesn’t mean malice, admits he and Trump share the flaw of responding emotionally to criticism.
- U2 Tickets Giveaway [00:59:53] — Dale gives away U2 tickets (with the Lumineers at NRG Stadium Houston, May 24) to caller 40. Wraps with final thoughts on importance of protecting media voices.
Recurring Bits
- Pop Cop [00:01:15] — Matt as PopCop delivers Friday the 13th news jokes, makes fun of Dale’s weight and drinking habits
- Animal Cavalcade [00:21:58] — Extended segment with multiple animal videos and news stories, including dogs on cage, puppy baby talk, cats with milk, rescued dogs from Korea, praying mantis, and horse with squeaky toy
Callers
- Hunter [00:49:05] — Defending Trump’s treatment of CNN reporter Jim Acosta, arguing CNN is fake news Heated argument with Dale where Hunter could not provide specific examples when challenged. Dale told him not to ‘bring a knife to a gunfight.’ Hunter hung up or was disconnected.
- Sean [00:58:04] — Called to support Dale’s rant about press freedom and thank him Praised Dale for confronting Trump supporters who can’t back up their arguments with facts. Said Dale earned his respect and called him his ‘new hero.’
Quotes
Be on the lookout. That’s frightening that the guy was peering into the window.
Dale Dudley [00:08:58]
You dare to ask a president a tough question? That’s called journalism.
Dale Dudley [00:42:03]
I say Randy Weber needs to resign because you’re an embarrassment telling the press to shut up.
Dale Dudley [00:45:17]
He’s the biggest pussy in this country. He’s exactly like me on Twitter.
Dale Dudley [00:51:17]
Getting something wrong is not fake news. It’s called journalism and it’s been around for hundreds of years.
Dale Dudley [00:55:33]
If you start to silence people in the media you think it can’t happen here, you’re wrong.
Dale Dudley [01:01:08]
Part 3: Comedian Josh Wolf
Comedian Josh Wolf visits the show for an in-studio interview. The conversation ranges widely from Josh’s recent boxing match with a female fighter arranged by Freddie Prinze Jr., to his stalker situation involving a mentally unstable woman, to stories about celebrity interviews and Chuck Norris. The hosts also discuss fight-or-flight responses, Bruce Willis phone call pranks, and the challenges of morning radio interviews with difficult celebrity publicists.
Segments
- Opening banter and boob job discussion [00:00:02] — Dale jokes about Amanda’s breast augmentation by Dr. Ned Snyder and reflects on potentially bullying a previous caller.
- Reflection on Russia bias [00:01:09] — Dale discusses his Cold War-era bias against Russia and his frustration with a caller who defended Trump’s relationship with Russia.
- Press freedom discussion continues [00:02:19] — The hosts debate the role of the press, political interference, and a Texas state representative calling for a reporter to be fired.
- Bill O’Reilly sexual harassment mention [00:04:00] — Dale mentions Bill O’Reilly being accused of sexual harassment for the second time.
- Franchise business discussion [00:04:14] — The hosts explore buying a franchise business online but get frustrated by data collection requirements.
- Charles caller on media consolidation [00:06:49] — Caller Charles discusses how media consolidation and the Telecommunications Act of 1996 have changed news coverage.
- Trump press conference aftermath [00:09:25] — Discussion of Trump staff cheering at the press conference and local news not challenging politicians.
- Network movie reference and franchise talk [00:10:18] — Caller Cue references the 1976 film ‘Network’ about profit motives in news, then discusses franchise opportunities.
- Girl Punch comedy show giveaway [00:11:10] — Matt promotes his upcoming Girl Punch show at Cap City Comedy Club for the following Tuesday.
- Food Fanatics segment [00:12:34] — The hosts discuss an Alchema device that turns fruit into cider, Jack Daniels whiskey-flavored coffee, Cadbury Oreo eggs, and the Taco Bell naked chicken chalupa.
- Ricky Williams story teaser [00:22:35] — Dale previews an upcoming interview with Ricky Williams about an incident in Tyler, Texas.
- Josh Wolf arrives [00:23:35] — Comedian Josh Wolf joins the show and begins telling stories.
- Boxing match with a woman [00:26:00] — Josh tells the story of sparring with a female fighter named Cara at Freddie Prinze Jr.’s gym and getting thoroughly beaten.
- Fight-or-flight discussion [00:39:00] — Dale shares his experience of a potential hostage situation at the radio station and discovering he’s not the hero he thought he’d be.
- Chuck Norris security story [00:44:01] — Dale tells how Chuck Norris sent a security detail days before appearing on the show and shares his failed Walker Texas Ranger audition story.
- Josh’s stalker story [00:49:00] — Josh Wolf shares his extensive story about a mentally unstable woman who has sent him thousands of emails and stalks him, Tom Cruise, and Sandra Oh.
- Bruce Willis phone call story [00:55:20] — Dale recounts hanging up on Bruce Willis three times thinking it was a prank call.
- Good vs. bad celebrity interviews [00:58:45] — The hosts discuss which celebrities give great interviews (Edward Norton) versus difficult ones (Jonah Hill with controlling publicists).
Recurring Bits
- Fast Food Fanatic [00:12:34] — Discussed Jack Daniels coffee, Cadbury Oreo eggs, Taco Bell naked chicken chalupa, and various food gadgets including the Slot Dog device
Guests
- Josh Wolf (comedian) [00:23:35] — In studio to promote his shows at Cap City Comedy Club, discussed his boxing match, stalker situation, and podcast with Freddie Prinze Jr.
Callers
- Charles [00:06:49] — Media consolidation and the Telecommunications Act of 1996 Led to discussion about how consolidated media has changed news coverage and created echo chambers
- Cue [00:10:18] — Referenced the 1976 film ‘Network’ and discussed starting a home inspection business Brief conversation about franchises and the film’s relevance to modern media
Quotes
We were told the ruskies were gonna nuke us until we glow
Dale Dudley [00:01:48]
I discovered you weren’t the hero. Were you disappointed? Yes.
Dale Dudley [00:40:01]
She’s insane but she’s not dangerous. How can you tell? She never mentioned God.
Josh Wolf [00:55:01]