Dudley and Bob with Matt — 93.7 KLBJ-FM, Austin — Tuesday, February 21, 2017
This Show
Part 1: Walmart Beer
The cast discusses Dale’s weekend movie viewing (Split), retirement planning anxiety, and various animal videos. Bob proposes that the mayor of Buda give Daniel a personal historical tour of the town. The segment includes discussions of tornadoes hitting San Antonio (affecting former show member Mikayla), craft beer definitions, PTSD research, and Wild West history. The show features an extended Animal Cavalcade with viral videos of a bird doing Rihanna, girls versus a rat, and an octopus-crab-seal interaction.
Segments
- Show Open and Split Movie Review [00:00:06] — Dale reviews M. Night Shyamalan’s ‘Split’, praising James McAvoy’s performance despite initial reluctance to see the film. He had to leave early and missed the ending.
- Retirement Planning Anxiety [00:06:41] — Dale discusses checking his 401k online and discovering he only has a 5% chance of reaching his retirement goal, expressing frustration about needing to work until 88.
- Buda Remote and Mayor’s Proposal [00:11:32] — Matt discusses his remote broadcast in Buda where the mayor offered to give Daniel a personal historical tour of the town, to be recorded for the show.
- Tornado Damage and Carissa’s Apology [00:18:42] — The cast discusses tornado damage in San Antonio that destroyed former show member Mikayla Floyd’s house while she’s seven months pregnant. Carissa apologizes for an old sound bite of her saying she hopes for tornadoes.
- Wild West History Deep Dive [00:31:50] — Dale discusses watching Robert Redford’s documentary about the Wild West, covering Sitting Bull, Crazy Horse, Custer’s Last Stand, and the decimation of buffalo to starve Native Americans.
- Animal Cavalcade [00:34:51] — The cast watches and reacts to viral animal videos: a bird doing Rihanna impressions, girls strategically removing a rat from their bathroom, a lizard waving back at its owner, and an octopus vs. crab fight ending with a seal eating the octopus.
- Walmart Fake Craft Beer Lawsuit [00:40:59] — Discussion of a class action lawsuit against Walmart for selling ‘Trouble Brewing’ beer marketed as craft beer when it doesn’t meet craft beer definitions. Touches on craft breweries being bought by major corporations.
- PTSD Prevention Drug Research [00:44:02] — Dale reads about research suggesting an affordable anti-inflammatory steroid could prevent PTSD from forming if taken immediately after traumatic events.
Recurring Bits
- Animal Cavalcade [00:34:51] — Extended segment featuring multiple viral animal videos including bird impressions, rat removal, waving lizard, and octopus-crab-seal encounter
Quotes
I hope that we get tornadoes.
Carissa Jade [00:20:08]
Both Sitting Bull and Crazy Horse had reservations about going to the reservation.
Dale Dudley [00:32:42]
Never vote against an octopus.
Matt Bearden [00:39:05]
Part 2: Thin Mints
This is part 2 of the show, featuring the hosts’ scattered morning conversation covering everything from retirement anxieties and pool installation to Girl Scout cookies and Sting concerts. Dale is stressed about his 401k forecasts showing he can’t retire until 78, while Bob recounts embarrassingly spilling a drink at a Sting concert. The segment ends with fast food news and disturbing ‘hoarder house’ stories. Throughout, the hosts bicker playfully, with Dale particularly cranky about various topics including Girl Scouts constantly ringing his doorbell.
Segments
- Show Opening and Giveaways [00:00:04] — Dale opens the show listing ticket giveaways including Psychedelic Furs, UT basketball vs. Baylor, and Texas Stars hockey tickets. Keywords to text for entry are ‘flow’ and ‘hack’.
- Texting at Home [00:01:11] — Dale discusses how 40% of people now text each other at home instead of yelling between rooms. The hosts reminisce about old intercom systems that nobody ever used.
- Misophonia and Eating Sounds [00:02:14] — Discussion of misophonia (Dale struggles to pronounce it) and loud eating at Alamo Drafthouse, with Dale immediately looking at Carissa as the culprit for crunching noises.
- Dale’s Daughter’s Injury [00:03:00] — Dale receives texts from his wife about their daughter’s hand injury from falling off a fence (not a swing as claimed). His wife wants to take her to the doctor, but Dale questions if it’s necessary.
- Alabama and Country Music [00:08:06] — The show plays ‘Kiss You All Over’ which Matt thinks sounds like an Alabama song. Dale reminisces about working at country stations and having to play Alabama constantly.
- Bob’s Tension Theory [00:12:01] — Bob feels like everyone is mad at him, creating an awkward dynamic in the studio. Dale is dealing with family texts and retirement anxiety.
- Retirement Panic [00:14:02] — Dale looked at his 401k forecast tool and learned he can’t retire until he’s 78 years old to maintain his current lifestyle. This revelation has put him in a bad mood.
- Springsteen Video Reaction [00:16:01] — Discussion of a viral video showing a 17-year-old getting pulled on stage to play guitar with Bruce Springsteen, which made Bob tear up – rare for him.
- The Third Car Regret [00:17:01] — Dale was feeling good about buying his Porsche until the retirement forecast ruined it. He and his wife went to the Domain/Rock Rose for date night.
- Rock Rose Endorsement [00:17:51] — Dale praises the new Rock Rose area at the Domain as a gorgeous entertainment district that’s better than downtown Austin for visitors. Matt confirms he took his family there too.
- Bob’s Sting Concert Story Setup [00:21:02] — Bob begins building up a story about spilling a drink at a Sting concert, dragging it out despite Dale’s impatience. The buildup becomes a running joke.
- Bob’s Sting History [00:24:14] — Bob defends going to the Sting concert by claiming he has ‘a history’ with Sting from interviewing him one-on-one years ago and filming his show.
- The Drink Spill Story Payoff [00:25:02] — Bob finally tells the story: he dropped a margarita at the ACL Live Sting show, and it exploded forward onto the woman in front of him. He offered to buy her drinks but she declined graciously.
- The Eggmen Camera Incident [00:27:41] — Bob recalls being chastised five years ago at an Eggmen (Beatles cover band) show for taking photos with a pocket camera. Now everyone films concerts constantly.
- Pool Installation Pressure [00:29:07] — Dale’s wife keeps inviting pool contractors over for bids despite Dale’s retirement concerns. The pool has become a symbol of his financial anxiety.
- What Constitutes a Deal [00:32:01] — Dale wants a simple rectangular pool without fountains or waterfalls, questioning what a ‘deal’ even means for something he can’t afford in retirement.
- Financial Planner Need [00:34:42] — Dale realizes he needs professional financial planning help but Bob’s constant negativity and talking him out of things frustrates him further.
- Three-Day Weekend Depression [00:36:01] — Matt identifies that Dale is always depressed after three-day weekends. Dale admits Sunday he thought he was going to die from feeling so bad.
- Fast Food Fanatic Begins [00:37:01] — The segment transitions to fast food news, with Dale eager to discuss something fun after the morning’s heavy topics.
- Escort Passport Radar Detector [00:38:42] — Dale brags that his new Escort Passport radar detector already paid for itself in the first week when he avoided getting a speeding ticket.
- Bumblebee Tuna Recall Story [00:39:34] — Dale tries to discuss a Bumblebee Tuna recall where a man got cooked into the tuna, but the story is from 2015 – two years old – causing embarrassment.
- Peeps Oreos [00:41:01] — Discussion of new Peeps-flavored Oreos coming out, which appear to be vanilla Oreos with purple peep-flavored filling. The hosts are skeptical but might try them.
- Alamo Drafthouse Burger Review [00:41:50] — Dale describes an incredibly thick burger he had at Alamo Drafthouse, leading to Daniel’s preference for thinner patties and discussion of a mac-and-cheese bun burger.
- Taco Bell Weddings in Las Vegas [00:43:41] — Taco Bell in Las Vegas now offers wedding packages for $600 including sauce packet bouquets, Cinnabon wedding cake, and just-married T-shirts.
- Starbucks Ice Cream Floats [00:44:26] — Starbucks is testing Frappuccino floats and affogatos in California stores only, frustrating the hosts who can’t get them locally despite constant food news about unavailable items.
- Carissa’s Flea Problem [00:45:01] — Carissa reveals her cat has ‘flea residue’ (flea poop) but no actual fleas found. She’s worried the leasing office might be listening to the show.
- Dinky Countdown [00:46:11] — Dale’s dog Dinky (inherited from his late mother) has three weeks left. They plan to sprinkle his ashes on Dale’s mother’s grave.
- McDonald’s Dual-Flavor Milkshake Straw [00:47:09] — McDonald’s invented a special U-shaped straw with two different holes for their dual-flavored shakes, but only made 2,000 of them in what appears to be a marketing stunt.
- Girl Scout Cookie Fatigue [00:48:14] — Dale has had enough of Girl Scout cookies and wants them to stop ringing his doorbell. Discussion of cookie prices rising and the competitive nature of Girl Scout cookie sales.
- Thin Mints Girl Scout Story [00:49:54] — Daniel recounts a CBS Sunday Morning story about a Girl Scout who rebelled against selling new cookies and only sold the popular ones (Thin Mints, Samoas), selling a record number.
- Caller Harrison on Cookie Prices [00:52:01] — A caller named Harrison reports Girl Scout cookies are now up to $4 per box and uses the word ‘gypped,’ prompting the hosts to tease him about the offensive term.
- World Record Finger Snapping Video [00:54:02] — The hosts watch a video of someone breaking the world record for finger snapping at 296 snaps, with Daniel unimpressed by the ‘talent’ involved.
- MMA Knockout Dance Video [00:56:19] — Video of an MMA fighter doing a taunting dance who gets knocked out by his opponent, demonstrating why you shouldn’t showboat in combat sports.
- Drunk Guy vs. Doorknob [00:57:12] — Matt’s featured video shows a very drunk man repeatedly running face-first into a doorknob with a sickening sound. The hosts are both horrified and fascinated.
- Hoarder House Horror Story [00:58:47] — Dale closes with a disturbing news story about a 550-pound woman who sat in the same chair for two years until her skin molded to it and her bones began snapping when rescuers tried to move her.
- Matt’s Comedy Show Promo [01:00:39] — Matt promotes tonight’s comedy show at Cap City Comedy Club featuring Martha Kelly and Chris Cubas, offering guest list spots to callers.
Recurring Bits
- Fast Food Fanatic [00:37:01] — Segment covering Pieology pizza, Peeps Oreos, Taco Bell weddings, Starbucks floats, McDonald’s dual-flavor shake straws, and Lucky Charms oatmeal
Callers
- Harrison [00:52:01] — Called to report Girl Scout cookies are now $4 per box instead of $3.50 The hosts teased him for using the word ‘gypped’ and made jokes about gypsies and other ethnic stereotypes
Quotes
To get where I wanted to be, I can’t retire until I’m 78 years old.
Dale Dudley [00:14:42]
If you are bringing people to town, don’t say anywhere downtown. They should go up to the Rock Rose.
Dale Dudley [00:17:51]
It’s the worst feeling in the world to be the guy. The a-hole.
Bob Fonseca [00:25:14]
Do you understand no one knows this radio show exists?
Dale Dudley [00:32:01]
Enough of the Girl Scout cookies. Stop ringing my doorbell.
Dale Dudley [00:48:58]
Part 3: Top of Texas
The show opens with Dale promoting a GoFundMe for listener Makayla whose San Antonio house was damaged by tornado. The hosts debate whether Psychedelic Furs were a one-hit wonder, with Bob claiming ‘Love My Way’ was their only hit and Dale insisting they had multiple hits. Later, Dale discusses Trump’s false claim about an incident in Sweden, Milo Yiannopoulos losing his book deal over pedophilia comments, and Texas Agriculture Commissioner Sid Miller being caught promoting a false story about hunters being shot by immigrants when they actually shot each other. The show ends with Daniel revealing he visited a town called Meridian that calls itself ‘Top of Texas,’ triggering an extended argument about what actually is the highest point in Texas (Guadalupe Peak).
Segments
- Makayla Tornado Damage [00:00:03] — Dale announces he’s posting a link to help listener Makayla and her husband whose San Antonio house was hit by a tornado, losing their roof.
- Psychedelic Furs Ticket Giveaway [00:01:11] — Dale gives away tickets to Psychedelic Furs at Emo’s on March 29th, triggering a lengthy debate about whether they were a one-hit wonder.
- Sweden Responds to Trump [00:09:36] — Dale plays a satirical Swedish video responding to Trump’s claim about ‘what happened in Sweden last night’ when nothing actually happened.
- Milo Yiannopoulos Pedophilia Comments [00:12:00] — Dale plays audio of Milo Yiannopoulos defending relationships between older men and underage boys, which led to him losing his book deal.
- Sid Miller False Immigrant Attack Story [00:17:32] — Dale reveals Texas Agriculture Commissioner Sid Miller promoted a false story about hunters being attacked by immigrants when they actually shot each other accidentally.
- Ted Nugent Senate Run Discussion [00:22:12] — The hosts discuss the possibility of Ted Nugent running for office in Michigan, with Dale hoping it happens so his history with underage girls becomes an issue.
- Top of Texas Road Trip [00:26:45] — Daniel tries to tell the hosts about visiting ‘Top of Texas’ over the weekend, but they refuse to let him explain, leading to an extended running joke and argument about what actually is the highest point in Texas.
- Porsche Club Invitation [00:36:01] — Dale receives an invitation from a caller to join the local Porsche Club of America for drives and events.
- CJ’s Hand Injury Revealed [00:39:00] — The hosts discuss that CJ’s hand injury requiring surgery was actually from punching something (possibly a TV or window) in anger at 3am, not from a planned surgery.
- Top of Texas Resolution [00:54:24] — Daniel finally reveals he visited Meridian, Texas, which calls itself ‘Top of Texas,’ but Dale proves Guadalupe Peak is actually the highest point in Texas at 8,749 feet.
Callers
- unnamed (Hampton, New Jersey (former location)) [00:07:33] — Called to agree with Bob that Psychedelic Furs only had one recognizable hit, mentioned working in radio for 7 years at WPNH Dale dismissed his opinion, pointing out his own 30 years of radio experience and that the station played multiple P Furs hits
- Brian [00:27:31] — Called about Ted Nugent avoiding the draft and the story of him defecating on himself to avoid service Dale pointed out Trump also got deferments for bone spurs, making the point that rich people got out of Vietnam
- Mike [00:29:08] — Asked Daniel about Top of Texas The hosts refused to engage and hung up on him
- Travis [00:34:19] — Called about being at Bob’s Sting show and getting into an altercation with a drunk Brazilian or European man who grabbed a woman’s butt Brief conversation about the incident at the adult contemporary concert
- unnamed [00:35:47] — Caller claimed to know where Top of Texas is The hosts told them not to say it and hung up
- Zack [00:35:56] — Social chair for Porsche Club of America, Hill Country region, inviting Dale to events and drives Dale agreed to be contacted via email. Revealed his girlfriend previously dated Daniel, leading to awkward banter about her ‘going from a Porsche to a Chevy Cavalier back to a Porsche’
- Brent [00:44:17] — Attempted a ‘deez nuts’ joke asking if they’d been to ‘Ladies Texas’ The joke completely bombed. The hosts mocked him mercilessly and hung up on him, then spent several minutes making fun of how badly he failed
Text Line
- [00:08:22] Text saying Sweden was attacked/something bad happened — read by Dale Dudley Led to Dale playing the satirical Swedish response video to Trump’s false claims
- [00:29:00] Multiple texts coming in about Top of Texas — read by Dale Dudley Dale refused to read them to prevent Daniel from getting to explain his road trip
Music
- Psychedelic Furs — Multiple songs played and discussed including ‘Love My Way,’ ‘Heartbreak Beat,’ ‘The Ghost in You,’ and ‘Pretty in Pink’ theme during debate about whether they were a one-hit wonder
Quotes
Nothing happened in Sweden. They’re Swedish. What do they know?
Dale Dudley [00:11:51]
So there’s your alt-right hero defending pedophilia.
Dale Dudley [00:16:27]
Please run, Ted. I know you live in Waco.
Dale Dudley [00:24:48]
He has autism. He’s got information we don’t have.
Bob Fonseca [00:32:02]
Have you guys ever been to your dad’s sweaty Texas?
Bob Fonseca [00:44:34]