Dudley and Bob with Matt — 93.7 KLBJ-FM, Austin — Monday, February 23, 2015
This Show
Part 1: Daddy Longlegs
Matt oversleeps and Dale calls to wake him up. The hosts discuss the Oscars (Boyhood lost to Birdman despite Patricia Arquette’s win), freezing weather in Austin, and Dale’s experiences playing Call of Duty online where other players mock him as ‘Jug Phantom.’ The segment devolves into debates about whether daddy long legs are the most venomous spider (they’re not), whether an octopus or crab would win in a battle, and discussion of the upcoming Dudley and Bob Under Five Film Festival. Dale announces Tim League from Alamo Drafthouse may provide a venue.
Segments
- Show Open – Matt’s Absence [00:00:03] — Show opens with Matt missing. Dale and Bob discuss cars, weather, and eventually call Matt who overslept after going to bed at 7:30pm following a week of insomnia.
- Oscars Recap [00:06:02] — Discussion of Boyhood being snubbed at the Oscars, losing to Birdman. Dale argues Austin filmmakers got shut out because they work outside the Hollywood system.
- Weather and School Closures [00:08:32] — Hosts discuss freezing temperatures (31-32 degrees), ice warnings, and potential school closures in the hill country areas around Austin.
- Dale’s Childhood Memories [00:10:59] — Dale shares stories about living with his cousin Becky (now district attorney in Llano), Uncle Marion’s booming voice, and riding motorcycles as a kid.
- Rooster Teeth Event [00:13:00] — Bob describes attending a sold-out Rooster Teeth live gaming event where people paid up to $200 to watch guys play video games. The venue was packed and they sold out of merchandise.
- Dale’s Call of Duty Stories [00:14:00] — Dale describes playing Black Ops 2 as ‘Jug Phantom’ and being harassed by other players for his poor kill-death ratio and playing style. He recently turned on chat and discovered how much people hate him.
- Batman Yells at Dale [00:22:05] — Dale plays audio of ‘Batman,’ an 18-year-old Call of Duty player, aggressively criticizing his gameplay, calling him names, and asserting ‘I’m already a damn good player here.’
- Water Freezes – Local News Parody [00:30:03] — Dale plays clip of Alabama TV reporter Muriel Bailey doing a segment demonstrating that water freezes in cold temperatures, reminding pet owners to bring water bowls inside. The hosts mock the obviousness.
- Octopus vs. Crab Debate [00:33:00] — The cast debates whether an octopus in water or a crab on land would win in a battle. They watch video evidence; the octopus dominates.
- Daddy Long Legs Myth [00:36:00] — Carissa insists daddy long legs are the most venomous spiders but their jaws can’t bite humans. Dale debunks this as myth – they have no venom glands at all. Extended debate ensues.
- Under Five Film Festival Update [00:44:00] — Dale announces Tim League from Alamo Drafthouse has offered to help with the Under Five Film Festival, potentially providing a venue. Current prize money from sponsors: $3,750.
Quotes
You can’t work outside the system and expect the system to reward you
Bob Fonseca [00:08:49]
This British chick goes off on me. Jug Phantom, quit going long around!
Dale Dudley [00:15:01]
I’m already a damn good player here, more fame for me
Batman (Call of Duty player) [00:24:56]
The reporter is letting you know when temperature drops, water freezes
Dale Dudley [00:31:56]
Part 2: Carissa’s Life Revelation
This segment covers a wide range of topics including Dale’s spring break planning dilemma, discussion of Bill O’Reilly’s disputed war reporting claims, American Sniper Oscar snub tweets, and culminates in Carissa sharing a major personal revelation about wanting to address her eating disorder and emotional decision-making. The segment also includes discussion of Paul Williams documentary, Jim Stafford novelty songs, and a woman claiming dinosaur fossils are hoaxes.
Segments
- Show open and daddy longlegs correction [00:00:00] — Dale opens noting Matt’s late arrival, then corrects Carissa’s earlier claim that daddy longlegs are the most venomous spiders (they’re not even spiders and have no venom).
- Podcast format suggestions [00:01:15] — Matt suggests a live podcast format where they pull random words from a bowl and discuss them for ten minutes at a time.
- Jim Stafford’s ‘Spiders and Snakes’ [00:03:00] — Dale plays the 1970s novelty song and discusses Jim Stafford’s career, now performing in Branson, Missouri.
- Paul Williams documentary recommendation [00:06:00] — Dale enthusiastically recommends ‘Still Alive,’ a documentary about prolific songwriter Paul Williams who wrote hits for the Carpenters and others but disappeared from public view.
- Oscars discussion attempt [00:12:00] — Bob tries repeatedly to discuss the Oscars while Dale deflects with various tangents including Love Boat theme and ‘My Girl Bill’ by Jim Stafford.
- American Sniper Oscar loss tweets [00:15:30] — Dale reads inflammatory tweets from viewers upset that American Sniper didn’t win Best Picture, including accusations of liberal Hollywood bias and xenophobic comments.
- Dale’s spring break planning crisis [00:21:00] — Dale discusses his vacation dilemma – spring break is coming but he hasn’t booked anything and airfares are climbing. Various destinations are suggested and rejected.
- Bill O’Reilly war reporting controversy [00:28:00] — Discussion of Mother Jones article challenging Bill O’Reilly’s claims about covering the Falklands War and having a gun pointed at him in Argentina, including clips and fact-checking.
- Bill O’Reilly’s falafel scandal [00:33:00] — The hosts recall O’Reilly’s 2004 sexual harassment case where he allegedly referred to a loofah as a falafel during inappropriate phone calls.
- Batman uppercut obituary [00:35:00] — Dale shares a Florida obituary that lists cause of death as ‘an uppercut from Batman’ instead of cancer.
- Carissa’s dog peed in bed [00:37:00] — Carissa reveals her dog Stevie peed in the bed over the weekend, leading to discussion about dogs sleeping in beds.
- Carissa’s life revelation [00:39:00] — Carissa shares that she’s having a major breakthrough about her lack of self-awareness, emotional decision-making, and eating disorder. She outlines plans to be more mindful and make better choices.
- Christians Against Dinosaurs video [00:50:00] — Dale plays a video of a woman claiming dinosaur fossils are hoaxes created by paleontologists using spackle to keep their jobs, part of her Christian agenda.
Guests
- Woman from Christians Against Dinosaurs (video) (other) [00:50:00] — Video clip of conspiracy theorist claiming dinosaur fossils are fabricated hoaxes
Music
- Jim Stafford — Played ‘Spiders and Snakes’ and ‘My Girl Bill’ – 1970s novelty songs discussed
Quotes
I was taught that patriotism is questioning your country not being a jingoistic flag waving
Dale Dudley [00:20:00]
I’m the most unselfaware person in the world
Carissa Jade [00:40:00]
I have to just want it and to do it
Carissa Jade [00:45:00]
Part 3: Legalizing Marijuana
The show continues with discussions about marijuana legalization laws in Texas, featuring news clips from the Texas Sheriff’s Association opposing any loosening of marijuana laws and Pat Robertson discussing a florist case. Dale rants about the hypocrisy of enforcing marijuana laws while alcohol is legal. The conversation shifts to personal stories about grilling mishaps, relationships, and health anxieties, with extensive discussion of Daniel’s first grilling experience and Carissa’s ongoing relationship struggles and medical anxieties.
Segments
- Schlotzky’s and Chili Parlor Shoutouts [00:00:00] — Dale thanks local businesses for bringing food. Bob shares his story about the infamous ‘Hey man, chili parlor is supposed to be fun’ incident with his kids.
- Round Rock Teacher Arrested for Marijuana [00:06:43] — Dale criticizes police for arresting a middle school teacher for marijuana found in her car during a parking lot sweep, calling it hypocritical and career-ruining.
- Texas Sheriff’s Association Opposes Marijuana Legalization [00:09:18] — The hosts play and mock news clips of Texas sheriffs opposing marijuana law reform, highlighting the financial success of Colorado’s legalization and the medical marijuana debate.
- Pat Robertson on Gay Wedding Florist Case [00:16:45] — Robertson’s commentary on a florist refusing service for a gay wedding is played, with hosts mocking his slippery slope arguments comparing gay marriage to marrying dogs.
- Daniel’s First Grilling Experience [00:22:12] — Daniel reveals he was scared to use his new wedding gift grill, didn’t season it properly, overcooked steaks, and had to finish them in the microwave, leading to extensive grilling advice from the hosts.
- Girl’s Volcano Experiment Goes Wrong [00:29:00] — The hosts watch and react to a video of a young girl getting vinegar in her eyes during a baking soda volcano experiment, testing whether Matt is ‘truly evil’ for laughing.
- James Jameson Cannibal Story Debunked [00:36:38] — Dale brings up a story about Jameson whiskey heir buying a slave girl for cannibals, but Bob investigates and finds it’s based on questionable 1890 New York Times reporting.
- Carissa’s Relationship and Anxiety Issues [00:42:08] — Extended discussion of Carissa’s fight with her boyfriend over a cold sore announcement at dinner, her inability to let things go, and Dale’s theory about her timeline being off regarding her self-improvement claims.
- Foreskin Regeneration Technology [00:54:05] — Dale discusses a news story about technology that could allow circumcised men to regrow their foreskins, leading to discussion of circumcision, Jewish traditions, and sensitivity issues.
Quotes
Hey man, chili parlor is supposed to be fun.
Dale Dudley [00:00:36]
If you’re a cop and you arrest people for marijuana and you drink alcohol, you’re a hypocrite.
Dale Dudley [00:06:55]
You’re taking it for your cancer. Next thing you know, you’re going to be taking it just for fun.
Dale Dudley [00:13:27]
How about I name your emotion for you? Grow the F up.
Dale Dudley [00:45:49]