Dudley and Bob with Matt — 93.7 KLBJ-FM, Austin — Thursday, April 30, 2015
This Show
Part 1: Traffic and Weird Sleep
Dale opens the show complaining about moving to Leander, losing his neighborhood bar (lakeside cafe), and dealing with home inspection repairs. The hosts discuss the breakdown of traffic etiquette and civility, including people not pulling over for funeral processions and ignoring school bus laws. The conversation veers into nostalgic territory with Dickey Goodman’s ‘break-in’ comedy records from the 60s and 70s, and Chicken Man radio serials. Carissa asks for advice about a bizarre sleep problem where she lifts her legs straight up in the air while sleeping.
Segments
- Show open and Dale’s moving stress [00:00:05] — Dale discusses becoming codependent with his wife at their neighborhood bar and his anxiety about moving to Leander, losing the lakeside cafe, and dealing with home inspection demands.
- Traffic civility breakdown [00:08:03] — Dale rants about the loss of traffic etiquette: no one pulled over for the Austin EMS helicopter crash funeral procession, school bus laws are ignored, drivers don’t wave when let in, and left-hand turn lane violations continue.
- Country highway etiquette gone [00:10:40] — Bob reminisces about drivers pulling over on the shoulder to let others pass on two-lane highways in South Texas, a courtesy that has disappeared.
- School zone violations [00:15:01] — Matt describes being honked at for going 20 mph in a school zone while everyone else sped past him.
- Carissa’s weight loss revelation [00:16:02] — Matt mentions an old photo showing Carissa was heavier when she started; she reveals she lost 20 pounds when she quit drinking wine.
- Grocery store etiquette debate [00:16:34] — Bob argues you shouldn’t eat food in the grocery store before paying; Dale and Matt defend drinking a soda while shopping and giving kids chocolate milk to stop screaming.
- Nathan’s Mobile Detailing plug [00:19:48] — Dale thanks Nathan from 512 Mobile Detailing for detailing his car, revealing he paid him five dollars more than the quoted price.
- House vandalism and move logistics [00:21:04] — Dale reveals his new Leander house was vandalized with sexual artwork by a texture crew worker, and discusses the costs of moving and security concerns leading him to put his property in a trust.
- Chernobyl fox makes a sandwich [00:23:09] — Dale shares a BBC video of a fox in the Chernobyl exclusion zone that appears to make a sandwich from bread and sausage, though the hosts are unimpressed by the fox’s sandwich-making skills.
- Stephen Hawking and parallel universes [00:29:52] — Dale discusses Stephen Hawking’s comment about Zayn Malik possibly being in One Direction in another universe, and proposes a theory that dreams are experiences of switching between parallel universes.
- Carissa’s bizarre sleep problem [00:31:34] — Carissa asks for advice about a month-long problem where she sleeps on her back with her legs straight up in the air, then tips over. Matt Dawson has to sleep on the couch because of it. Daniel suggests it might be genetic.
- Dickey Goodman break-in records [00:38:48] — The hosts discover and play Dickey Goodman’s 1960s-70s comedy ‘break-in’ records that used snippets of hit songs as interview answers, including ‘Flying Saucer’, ‘Energy Crisis’, and ‘Mr. Rocky’.
- Chicken Man radio serial [00:43:40] — Bob mentions Chicken Man, a 1960s radio serial about a shoe salesman who fights crime on weekends dressed as a chicken. They play clips and Dale admits Bob has accused all his character voices of sounding like Chicken Man.
Callers
- unnamed (from Oregon) [00:17:24] — Explaining that Oregon allows legally blind people to drive with bioptic telescopic lenses in certain zones Dale is confused, thanks her for calling from Oregon, and mentions Oregon’s assisted suicide law
- unnamed [00:18:43] — Wanted to share a traffic etiquette story about someone tailgating him in the middle lane on Mopac Dale cuts him off saying he can’t take calls about individual traffic incidents; the caller says it’s about society breaking down but Dale moves on
Quotes
We should have neighborhood pubs. The English are much more happy, much more settled than we are.
Dale Dudley [00:02:14]
No one cared, no one pulled over. You would have seen some people get out and take their hats off.
Dale Dudley [00:09:50]
Nobody waves when you let them in anymore. Zero civility.
Dale Dudley [00:12:51]
Change is always weird for me.
Dale Dudley [00:21:45]
Part 2: Work naps
This part opens with Dale promoting the show’s European cruise and discussing Baltimore riots, blasting Ted Cruz and Texas Rep. Bill Flores for blaming the unrest on Obama and gay marriage respectively. The crew discusses the ‘work nap’ topic, where listeners called in with stories of sleeping on the job. A significant amount of time is spent on CJ Morgan admitting he kicked a computer in frustration, leading to an email reprimand from management. The segment ends with discussion of Highland Mall closing and more Baltimore commentary.
Segments
- European cruise promotion [00:00:00] — Dale promotes the show’s European cruise, mentions Facebook group, upcoming happy hour at Cap City Comedy Club, and lists people who’ve signed up including listeners from Saudi Arabia and Canada.
- Ted Cruz blames Obama for Baltimore [00:02:01] — Dale plays audio of Ted Cruz blaming President Obama for inflaming racial tensions and not being a unifying figure. Dale mocks Cruz’s response.
- Bill Flores blames gay marriage [00:05:47] — Texas Rep. Bill Flores on Family Research Council’s radio show blames breakdown of traditional marriage and gay marriage for Baltimore violence. Matt challenges Flores to meet his wife who was raised in a gay household.
- Baltimore mother praised [00:11:00] — Discussion of Toya Graham, the Baltimore mother who was filmed hitting her son to get him away from the riots. Dale praises her actions despite concerns about violence.
- Geraldo confronted in Baltimore [00:15:56] — Audio played of young Baltimore man confronting Geraldo Rivera about Fox News only covering riots and not poverty. Man makes articulate points about media coverage.
- Work nap topic begins [00:20:42] — Dale introduces topic about where people have taken naps at work, triggered by story of baggage handler who fell asleep in plane cargo hold.
- Highland Mall closing [00:23:05] — Brief segment noting Highland Mall closes for good today after 44 years. Hosts share memories of shopping there, Warner Brothers store, food court.
- Work nap calls [00:27:00] — Multiple callers share stories of work naps: sleeping in trucks, on military vessels, in Iraq convoys, in empty apartments, on submarines, and while parachuting.
- Carissa’s sleep disorder [00:37:00] — Discussion of photo showing Carissa sleeping with her legs straight up in the air, a recurring issue that’s disrupting her boyfriend’s sleep.
- CJ kicked the computer [00:41:03] — Dale reads management email about damaged equipment. CJ confesses to kicking the VoxPro computer in frustration. Brian from IT comes in to explain the damage. Discussion of CJ’s temper issues.
- Racist Facebook post [00:53:02] — Dale reads Facebook post from Dave Southern showing him burning KFC and pouring out soda with AR-15, claiming he’s not racist while complaining about Baltimore protesters.
Guests
- Brian (IT staff) (other) [00:48:13] — Came in to discuss the damaged computer equipment that CJ kicked
Callers
- Rob [00:27:34] — Worked for unnamed car company, would nap in truck at North Star Mall parking garage in San Antonio after deliveries Shared story and asked where to find Spencer’s now that Highland Mall is closing
- unnamed [00:29:42] — Worked for Drew Green on Fort Hood, would cut paths in brush and sleep in truck with AC running Brief story shared, ended quickly
- unnamed (Iraq veteran) [00:32:00] — Slept during convoy runs in Iraq in soft-top Humvees with no doors, figured if IED hit he’d die anyway Dale asked about IED video, caller mentioned he was a bomb dog handler
- unnamed [00:35:49] — Navy submarine, slept on reactor plant freshwater heat exchanger Dale joked about watching Deadliest Catch
- unnamed [00:39:42] — Military, guided missile destroyer going through Suez Canal, slept next to gas turbine engine Brief thank you from Dale, topic ‘petering out’
- unnamed [00:46:07] — Called about Spencer’s Outlet in Round Rock Provided information about where to find Spencer’s
Quotes
Way to go, old rich white guy. Blame the president.
Dale Dudley [00:04:35]
To diminish what she’s tried to do and blame it on some fairytale is offensive.
Dale Dudley [00:14:21]
Desperate people do desperate things. Period.
Dale Dudley [00:18:23]
I need to say chicken shit. I have to say it.
Dale Dudley [00:07:56]
Part 3: Sahara Dreams
This final segment of the show featured a meandering discussion that began with the Sahara Desert after Daniel claimed it was man-made, leading to extensive debate about geography and climate. Dale grew increasingly tired and irritable as the show progressed, complaining about awards, the minibar industry dying, and various workplace frustrations. The segment ended with an awkward encounter with Lena, a young intern who admitted she didn’t know who Bruce Springsteen was, leaving the hosts deflated.
Segments
- Cruise and Blimp Invitations [00:00:00] — Dale promotes the upcoming cruise and announces that Hendricks gin has invited them to ride in a flying cucumber (blimp). They discuss scheduling conflicts with the show.
- Carissa’s Legs Photo [00:01:46] — Dale discusses posting a censored photo of Carissa’s legs-up sleeping position online, joking about CJ censoring it with a beef and cheddar sandwich.
- Daniel’s Sahara Claim [00:03:00] — Daniel reveals he told his wife the Sahara Desert was man-made due to deforestation and farming. The hosts investigate and discover climate change, not humans, created the desert 5,000 years ago.
- Rivers and Geography Debate [00:08:00] — Daniel claims the Nile is the only river that runs north. Matt quickly finds a list of 300 rivers that flow north, continuing the pattern of Daniel being wrong about geography.
- Phone Panic [00:10:00] — Daniel reveals Carissa was hanging up on callers because her receiver was on mute, making her think people were just breathing on the line.
- Orson Welles Outtakes [00:11:35] — The hosts play extended outtakes of Orson Welles drunkenly struggling through champagne and frozen peas commercials, berating directors and making strange noises.
- Turn TV Show Guest Announcement [00:23:00] — Dale announces they’ll interview Samuel Roukin from AMC’s ‘Turn’ on Monday. Bob discovers the show’s star played Billy Elliot as a child.
- Mystery Box in Florida [00:24:18] — Dale plays a news report about a Tampa man finding a box in his grandparents’ attic containing a human hand with a ring, treasure map, and coins. The story ends inconclusively.
- The Death of the Minibar [00:29:00] — Dale explains why hotels are phasing out minibars: revenues dropped 28% since 2007, guests steal items and replace them with inferior goods, and restocking is a nightmare.
- Building Relationships and Awards Rant [00:42:00] — Dale becomes increasingly bitter about not receiving awards despite charity work, complaining that he can’t even name the new salespeople yet supposedly got fives in ‘building relationships.’
- Charity Work Gone Wrong [00:48:00] — Dale explains why he stopped doing his monthly charity segment: recipients complained about free carpet selections, people just wanted things for themselves, and it became exhausting to coordinate.
- High Pockets Gets His Feelings Hurt [00:52:00] — Dale mentions that High Pockets, who never gets his feelings hurt, was upset after they criticized ticket scalping on The Sideshow podcast.
- Meeting Lena the Intern [00:53:00] — Lena, a marketing intern, comes into the studio. The hosts discover she doesn’t know who Billy Joel or Bruce Springsteen are, leading to a deflating end to the show.
Recurring Bits
- The Sideshow [00:52:00] — Dale mentions they nailed High Pockets on yesterday’s Sideshow podcast episode about ticket scalping
Guests
- Lena (other) [00:53:00] — Marketing and event planning intern who will work the anniversary party; revealed she doesn’t know Bruce Springsteen
Callers
- unnamed [00:15:40] — Explained that the Sahara was made by the Earth tilting on its axis every 30,000 years, making the Amazon a former desert Dale lost interest after the caller said ‘PC master race’ about gaming, leading to a tangent about video game consoles
Quotes
Do you know how big the Sahara is? It’s almost the size of the United States
Dale Dudley [00:03:25]
The Nile is the only river that runs north
Daniel Gallo [00:08:01]
I come home drunk from an event and you wake up the next morning, the Toblerone wrapper is on your chest
Dale Dudley [00:32:00]
We need money for our son’s eyeball that’s falling on the floor and we don’t know how to get it back in
Dale Dudley [00:50:00]