Dudley and Bob with Matt — 93.7 KLBJ-FM, Austin — Monday, August 10, 2015
This Show
Part 1: Dale the Bed Eater
Dale, Bob, and Matt return from vacation, sharing travel stories and mishaps. Dale spent the week in Breckenridge, Colorado, Bob in Vail, and Matt drove to Florida with his family. Dale discovers sugar ants infesting his bed and reveals he’s been eating diet bars while lying down, leading to the segment title ‘Dale the Bed Eater.’ The crew also discusses airline delays, TSA experiences, and rental cars before diving into vacation adventures and various tangential debates about Star Trek, Woody Allen, and Mama Cass.
Segments
- Show open and return from vacation [00:00:00] — The show opens with introductions and the hosts discussing their return to the air after vacation. Dale mentions Simon Pegg will call in later.
- Star Trek debate [00:01:43] — The crew argues about whether Star Trek is science fiction, with Bob insisting the new J.J. Abrams films are great and Dale admitting he doesn’t know who Simon Pegg is.
- Airport and TSA experiences [00:05:00] — Dale recounts his three-hour flight delay and TSA pre-check experience. Bob shares being retweeted by TSA after they wished him happy birthday.
- Silver Car rental praise [00:09:40] — Dale enthusiastically recommends Silver Car rental service, detailing how every car is a silver Audi A4 with wifi and phone integration.
- Matt’s Florida road trip disaster [00:12:00] — Matt describes leaving at 3 a.m. for a 12.5-hour drive to Florida, only to turn around 90 minutes in because his wife forgot their daughter’s corrective glasses, making it a 19-hour journey total.
- Mobile tunnel detour [00:15:00] — Matt explains avoiding the notoriously bad tunnel in Mobile, Alabama by following local drivers to an old tunnel from the 1700s.
- Beach tent storm [00:16:00] — Matt recounts holding onto their air tent during a massive storm while yelling at his wife to deflate it as their kids cried.
- ER visits teased [00:17:30] — Matt mentions he’s been to the ER twice in 24 hours and saw the ‘beautiful city of Beaumont’ but saves details for later.
- Ornamental grass discussion [00:18:30] — Daniel mentions doing yard work during vacation, planting ornamental grass in 100+ degree heat at 5 p.m., which he thought was cooler but learned is actually the hottest time of day.
- Dale’s sugar ant infestation [00:20:00] — Dale reveals he woke up to sugar ants all over his bed, spending the night picking them off and killing them. His wife blames crumbs from diet bars he eats in bed.
- Couple’s massage in Breckenridge [00:26:00] — Dale and Bob discuss getting couple’s massages on vacation. Bob’s wife gave him a massage for his birthday.
- Morning show visit from Debbie [00:29:00] — Debbie from another show stops by, apparently still drunk or hungover from a pool party the night before, leading to awkward banter about ratings.
- Airplane fight video [00:32:00] — The crew watches news footage of Adam Keeling punching a passenger on a United flight after refusing to turn off his cell phone. Dale notes the guy looked like Matt.
- Tracheotomy lady on plane [00:36:00] — Dale tells the story of sitting next to an elderly woman with a tracheotomy on his flight home, with his wife trying unsuccessfully to communicate with her.
- Bed eating confession [00:39:00] — Dale’s wife texts that the ants are coming for crumbs on his side of the bed. The crew mocks Dale for eating diet bars in bed, comparing him to Elvis.
- Mama Cass death myth [00:42:00] — The crew discusses the myth that Mama Cass died from choking on a ham sandwich, clarifying she actually died of a heart attack. The conversation devolves into inappropriate jokes and tangents about John Phillips.
Guests
- Simon Pegg (other) [00:00:32] — Mentioned as scheduled to call in later in the show during ‘Morning Impossible’ segment
- Debbie (from another morning show) (other) [00:29:00] — Stopped by the studio, apparently hungover or still drunk from a pool party, made brief appearance
Text Line
- [00:39:00] Dale’s wife texted that the ants are going for the crumbs on his side of the bed, specifically from his diet food bars — read by Dale Dudley Sparked extended discussion about Dale eating in bed, with the crew mocking his habits and comparing him to Elvis
Quotes
Star Trek is not science fiction.
Dale Dudley [00:03:56]
No more prisoners, man. We’re gonna go back and do what we do.
Dale Dudley [00:22:43]
I pulled the covers back last night and there were sugar ants all over the bed.
Dale Dudley [00:23:00]
You can put a guy in a half million dollar house, but you can’t take the flop house out.
Matt Bearden [00:39:34]
When I eat lying down, it’s diet food.
Matt Bearden [00:41:31]
Part 2: Counting Your Potato Chips
Dale and Bob return from separate Colorado vacations and clash over Bob’s behavior at an expensive Vail restaurant, where he complained about a $22 rock shrimp sandwich and walked out, leaving Dale to apologize to the waiter. The show also discusses Donald Trump’s debate performance and rising poll numbers despite controversy over his Megyn Kelly comments, Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton’s indictment, and Dale’s comparison of Breckenridge (authentic mining town) versus Vail (modern, Disney-fied resort). The segment title ‘Counting Your Potato Chips’ refers to Bob literally counting the five potato chips that came with his underwhelming lunch.
Segments
- Return from vacation and weather talk [00:00:00] — Dale discusses the heat in Austin and promotes their upcoming podcast at Cap City Comedy Club on September 3rd, nearly sold out with only 50 pairs of tickets remaining.
- Whole Foods asparagus water controversy [00:09:00] — Discussion of Whole Foods trying to sell bottles of water with asparagus stalks for $5.99, which they called a ‘mistake’ after public backlash. Transitions to talk about the Motherload Restaurant in Breckenridge.
- Breckenridge vs Vail debate [00:13:00] — Dale defends Breckenridge as an authentic 1800s mining town versus Vail’s modern, Disney-like construction. Describes driving up to the Continental Divide on treacherous roads.
- Continental Divide explanation [00:16:00] — Dale tries to explain the Continental Divide to Carissa, who struggles with the concept, thinking it’s the opposite of the equator or related to tectonic plates.
- Sergeant Sam retirement party incident [00:22:00] — Dale and Bob describe awkwardly walking into Sergeant Sam’s retirement party during speeches, with Sam immediately saying ‘who else y’all going to hand to trash?’ They quickly left and Dale left a note on Sam’s truck.
- Mysterious employee departure [00:26:00] — Dale reads a company email stating an unnamed employee is ‘no longer an employee and not welcome in the building,’ much harsher than the usual departure notices.
- Ken Paxton indictment discussion [00:27:00] — Discussion of Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton being indicted on securities fraud charges, with one charge carrying a maximum sentence of life. Matt points out the investigation was done by Texas Rangers, not liberal Travis County.
- Donald Trump debate analysis [00:30:00] — Extended discussion of Trump’s debate performance, his ‘blood coming out of her wherever’ comment about Megyn Kelly, media attempts to bring him down, and his poll numbers actually increasing despite controversy.
- Rick Perry’s ‘Ronald Raven’ gaffe [00:39:00] — Playing audio of Rick Perry appearing to say ‘Ronald Raven’ instead of ‘Ronald Reagan’ at the kids’ table debate. Discussion of Perry’s glasses strategy not working.
- Stabilized Bigfoot footage [00:41:00] — Dale shows the famous Bigfoot video that has been digitally stabilized, making it more obviously look like a person in a gorilla suit, though Bob points out the person is still hunched over.
- The Vail restaurant incident [00:44:00] — The main story: Dale drove to Vail to meet Bob for lunch. After waiting 45 minutes at Sweet Basil restaurant, Bob ordered a $22 ‘rock and roll’ rock shrimp sandwich, complained it was ‘underwhelming,’ got caught by the waiter mid-complaint, then walked out leaving Dale to apologize.
- Defending the rock shrimp complaint [00:50:00] — Bob argues the dish was legitimately underwhelming—two small hotdog buns with only four tiny rock shrimp each and five potato chips. Matt and Dale argue Bob was in an expensive mountain resort town where seafood is expensive and not locally available.
- Bob’s birthday dinner disaster [00:59:00] — Bob reveals he also complained at his $58 wagyu steak birthday dinner that night, saying it had so much sinew he couldn’t cut through it. Ends with Dale giving away Def Leppard/Styx/Tesla tickets.
Quotes
I don’t have time for political correctness. I went right on.
Dale Dudley [00:30:00]
Only a sick person would even think about it. Only a deviant would say that.
Donald Trump [00:33:00]
Just don’t apologize. That’s what the world needs, man.
Dale Dudley [00:40:00]
Should you ever have to count your potato chips?
Bob Fonseca [00:57:00]
Part 3: Simon Pegg
The hosts return from vacation and share stories: Matt’s son had severe tonsil issues requiring an ER visit in Beaumont, Bob failed to complete a mountain hike in Vail, and Dale legally purchased marijuana in Colorado. The main event is a phone interview with actor Simon Pegg promoting Mission: Impossible – Rogue Nation. The show wraps with discussion of casual workplace dress codes and a mysterious employee dismissal.
Segments
- Pre-Fall Fun Podcast Promo [00:00:01] — Dale and Bob discuss their upcoming live podcast September 3rd, debating the title ‘Pre-Fall Fun’ versus ‘Fall Preview.’
- Matt’s Son’s Tonsil Crisis [00:01:36] — Matt describes his son’s severe tonsil infection that required an ER visit in Beaumont during their drive back from Florida. The child could barely breathe and needed a painful antibiotic injection.
- Bob’s Mountain Hike Failure [00:08:04] — Bob admits he quit halfway up a Vail mountain trail, citing exhaustion and altitude, while his family continued. A three-year-old passed him on the way down.
- Dale’s Legal Marijuana Purchase [00:12:01] — Dale describes visiting a dispensary in Colorado, buying a pre-rolled joint called ‘LA Confidential,’ and his experience with legal cannabis versus the paranoid high he usually gets.
- Movie Recommendations [00:24:54] — Dale recommends several films including Ex Machina, ’71, Headhunters (Norwegian), These Final Hours, and the documentary The Wrecking Crew about studio musicians who played on famous 60s/70s albums.
- Carissa’s Dog Crisis [00:31:57] — Carissa’s dog Stevie stopped eating and drinking after the death of Potter, requiring IV fluids at the vet.
- Pet Psychic Discussion [00:35:03] — The hosts mock the concept of pet psychics after Dale finds a Facebook post from an ‘animal communicator’ claiming to have spoken with Cecil the Lion.
- Simon Pegg Interview [00:40:47] — Phone interview with actor Simon Pegg about Mission: Impossible – Rogue Nation, discussing the stunts, Tom Cruise doing his own stunts, filming locations, and being in multiple franchises.
- Workplace Flip-Flop Ban [00:52:36] — Dale discusses a CEO who banned flip-flops on casual dress days, leading to debate about appropriate footwear in professional settings and Bob’s story about stinky feet at a movie theater.
Recurring Bits
- The Sideshow [00:29:36] — Dale suggests doing a ‘movie endings that make you cry’ segment on the sideshow that day
Guests
- Simon Pegg (other) [00:40:47] — Phone interview promoting Mission: Impossible – Rogue Nation, discussing stunts, Tom Cruise, franchises, and his love of Austin
Callers
- Corey (Charleston) (regular) [00:21:41] — Asked if marijuana will be the next ‘get rich’ investment opportunity like the dot-com boom Dale agrees there will be billionaires made when Texas legalizes, but timing is everything. Brief discussion before moving on.
- Rob (regular) [00:24:26] — Compared Donald Trump to the movie Bullworth – a politician who says whatever comes to mind Dale thanks him and moves on quickly. Called ‘mailman’ by Dale.
Quotes
It came in a single container like he bought one Bartles and James
Dale Dudley [00:12:34]
These guys played on Crosby Stills and Nash records – they didn’t play on their own records
Bob Fonseca [00:28:55]
Cinema should be about watching films with lots of people, not just gigantic films
Simon Pegg [00:45:32]