Dudley and Bob with Matt — 93.7 KLBJ-FM, Austin — Monday, September 14, 2015
This Show
Part 1: Victorian Couple
Dale discusses his new 2-to-3pm show on 590 AM and how he accidentally over-texted comedian Bill Burr about appearing as a guest, not realizing Bill’s show is next Monday, not today. The crew analyzes the Texas Longhorns’ win over Rice despite concerning stats, debates fantasy football losses, and mocks a Seattle couple who live a ‘Victorian lifestyle’ while maintaining blogs and media interviews. Carissa shares photos from her camping trip to Olympic National Park’s Quinault Rainforest.
Segments
- Show Open [00:00:02] — Daniel delivers the show intro. Traffic blockage on I-35 due to fatality near the station forces staff to negotiate with APD to access the building.
- Victorian Horse Meme [00:01:14] — Dale opens by sharing his favorite internet meme of the week: a Victorian painting with ‘now watch me whip, now watch me neigh neigh’ captions.
- I-35 Fatality Impacts Commute [00:02:20] — The crew discusses the fatal accident on the I-35 service road blocking access to the station. Matt hasn’t arrived yet due to road closures.
- Carissa’s Vacation and Bob’s Jealousy [00:03:29] — Dale compliments Carissa on her vacation photos from the Pacific Northwest. Bob denies being jealous but Matt jokes about Bob’s fun deficiency.
- Fantasy Football Disaster [00:04:44] — Daniel lost to Mike Clark by a fraction of a point. Dale’s keeper Dez Bryant broke his foot. Dallas Cowboys won on a last-second Romo-to-Witten touchdown.
- Dale’s New AM Show Jitters [00:08:53] — Dale announces his first show on 590 AM starts today at 2pm. He’s extremely nervous and thinks he’s already screwed up by not having a guest.
- Longhorns Beat Rice – Sort Of [00:09:33] — Matt and Dale argue over whether the 42-28 win over Rice was actually good. Rice dominated time of possession 44-15 and had 31 first downs to Texas’s 11.
- Carissa’s Quinault Rainforest Trip [00:19:28] — Carissa explains her backpacking trip to Lake Quinault and the Quinault Rainforest in Olympic National Park, Washington. The crew is baffled by how she planned it.
- The Bill Burr Text Disaster [00:24:32] — Dale reveals he invited Bill Burr to be his first guest on the AM show via text, not realizing Bill meant next Monday (game day), not today. Dale sent five frantic texts in a row offering tailgate access and front-row tickets – which Bill specifically said he didn’t want.
- Victorian Couple Segment [00:32:54] — Dale introduces Sarah and Gabriel Christman, a Seattle couple who have lived as Victorians for five years – dressing in period clothing, using no modern technology, and riding a penny-farthing bicycle – while maintaining a blog and doing media interviews.
Quotes
Now watch me whip, now watch me neigh neigh. That’s the funniest thing you’re going to hear all day.
Dale Dudley [00:01:51]
I don’t feel like radio is a real job.
Dale Dudley [00:12:36]
I wrote back my number and he wrote okay cool you want to go and I said starting a second show
Dale Dudley [00:24:50]
This reminds me of when my kid goes out on the playground and tries to ask other kids to play.
Matt Bearden [00:28:45]
I would love to take this young lady and stick them in a house downtown in July and August in Texas.
Dale Dudley [00:40:12]
Part 2: Nazi Soldiers Were High
This part opens with Dale discussing his Facebook friends and transitions into a segment about Nazi soldiers using methamphetamine during WWII, with Dale sharing stories about his father using ‘pep pills.’ The hosts debate Trump’s political rhetoric and parallels to Nazi Germany. They announce upcoming events including Dale’s afternoon AM show and a Halloween party. The latter portion devolves into the hosts teasing Daniel about his late grandmother, who took him to see Forrest Gump, owned pet cows named Winifred, Ophelia, and Colette, and was buried in her wedding dress. The conversation becomes increasingly absurd with ghost jokes and cow stories.
Segments
- Facebook Drama and Amazon Controversy [00:00:00] — Dale talks about his Facebook friends list being filled with listeners and their personal drama. Discussion moves to a listener boycotting Amazon over an anti-police shirt.
- Tequila Bat Race Video [00:03:37] — The crew watches a video of a Buffalo Bills fan doing a ‘yard of beer’ challenge followed by spinning with a bat, ending with him running into a bus and getting knocked out cold.
- Kim Davis Update [00:05:05] — Discussion of Kentucky clerk Kim Davis returning to work after being jailed for refusing to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples. She agrees not to block other clerks from issuing licenses but won’t endorse them herself.
- Nazi Soldiers Were High [00:09:22] — Dale discusses a new book revealing Hitler’s Nazi soldiers were addicted to Pervitin, a pill form of crystal meth. Dale shares stories about his father Earl Eugene Dudley taking ‘pep pills’ over the counter and allegedly walking the entire loop of Houston while high.
- Trump and Nazi Parallels [00:13:00] — Matt draws parallels between Trump’s rhetoric about deporting 11 million people and how the Nazi party rose to power in Germany. Dale discusses how Germany was decimated after WWI and how gangs blamed Jews for problems, similar to Trump’s scapegoating.
- Archduke Ferdinand Assassination [00:14:34] — Brief discussion of how WWI started with the assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand and how one moment changed all of history.
- Sarah Palin Returns [00:16:43] — Dale plays audio of Sarah Palin giving an incoherent speech about Russia and Obama. He notes Trump has mentioned giving her a cabinet position and suggests Trump is trying to bail out of the race.
- Show Promos [00:19:51] — Dale announces his afternoon show on KLBJ-AM at 2pm, upcoming Halloween party at Sherlock’s, ACL ticket giveaways, and the European cruise featuring Ricky Williams teaching yoga.
- Daniel’s Bear Sighting [00:23:46] — Carissa returns from vacation in the Pacific Northwest having seen a bear. Daniel is ‘jelly’ and brought back pictures of bear poop from his own vacation. Bizarre discussion about whether First Nations people hunted bears, with Daniel insisting they didn’t because he saw no evidence in museums.
- Totem Pole Construction [00:27:00] — Daniel questions how totem poles stay up if trees fall in windstorms. The crew explains modern totem poles are cemented with metal bars and aren’t just balanced on the ground.
- Leslie Cochran Statue [00:31:05] — Discussion of controversial statue of Austin cross-dresser Leslie Cochran placed at 6th and Congress. Dale reads Facebook comments from people outraged it honors a ‘homeless transvestite’ while Confederate statues are being removed.
- Sam Levine Guest Announcement [00:39:08] — Daniel announces actor Sam Levine is coming in Wednesday despite their Twitter feud about morning radio. Levine has been directed by Quentin Tarantino.
- Photos with Dead Bodies [00:40:17] — Discussion of an Ohio mother who posted a photo of herself and her children standing next to their deceased father in a casket to show the reality of drug addiction. Comparison to 1800s tradition of photographing the dead.
- California Death with Dignity [00:48:25] — Brief mention of California voting on assisted suicide legislation for terminally ill patients.
- Daniel’s Grandmother Stories [00:49:31] — Extended teasing of Daniel about his late grandmother who took him to see Forrest Gump and Natural Born Killers, owned pet cows named Winifred, Ophelia, and Colette for tax exemption purposes, and was buried in her wedding dress with her prized possessions. The hosts mock him relentlessly with ghost jokes while Daniel shares genuinely sweet memories.
Guests
- Sam Levine (comedian) [00:39:08] — Announced as upcoming guest for Wednesday, actor who has been directed by Quentin Tarantino and had Twitter argument with the show about morning radio
Quotes
Goodbye Amazon, love how they just set up a one-way ticket to bankruptcy
Dale Dudley [00:01:55]
She’s fighting for religious freedom with all the nutty white people on her side
Dale Dudley [00:05:45]
When you get caught speeding, just tell the cop you don’t believe in speeding
Dale Dudley [00:07:53]
I don’t know why you trash Sarah Palin, she’s wonderful – no one does that anymore
Dale Dudley [00:18:56]
Part 3: Pee-Proof Paint
Dale, Bob, and Matt mock a Lumberton, Texas high school cheerleading squad’s 9/11 tribute performance set to Lee Greenwood’s ‘I’m Proud to be an American.’ The show then interviews Mark Shaw, CEO of Ultra-Ever Dry (the pee-repellent paint company), but quickly discovers he didn’t invent the product—he just licenses and markets it—leading to a running joke about Daniel’s questionable booking. The segment ends with the crew mercilessly roasting Daniel and Carissa for agreeing to give a 50-minute talk on radio production to 2,500 college journalism students, despite neither doing most of the production tasks they’re supposed to teach.
Segments
- Show opening and Thinkery event [00:00:00] — Dale and Matt discuss an upcoming Thinkery fundraising event they’re hosting that appears to be sold out, and Matt mentions getting fitted for a tuxedo.
- Lumberton cheerleaders 9/11 tribute [00:03:05] — The crew watches and mocks a high school cheerleading squad’s 9/11 memorial performance set to ‘I’m Proud to be an American,’ criticizing the choreography while acknowledging the gymnastic skill.
- Lee Greenwood prank call flashback [00:10:09] — Dale recalls trolling Lee Greenwood in an interview where Chris Cubis asked about the ‘gay bridge’ (Golden Gate Bridge).
- Ken Paxton 9/11 social media controversy [00:12:04] — Bob discusses trolling Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton for branding 9/11 remembrance posts with his logo and creating meme-worthy content around tragedies.
- Mark Shaw pee-paint interview [00:15:51] — The crew interviews Mark Shaw from Ultra-Ever Dry about hydrophobic nanotechnology coating, only to discover he didn’t invent it but licenses and markets it, leading to embarrassment about Daniel’s booking.
- College journalism convention speaking gig [00:28:44] — Daniel and Carissa reveal they’re scheduled to give a 50-minute presentation on radio production to 2,500 college journalism students, despite doing minimal prep work themselves. The crew mercilessly roasts them for the next 20 minutes.
- TED Talk cult allegations [00:36:00] — A caller warns Carissa and Daniel about TED Talk’s allegedly cult-like treatment of speakers, citing chef Eddie Huang’s complaints on Joe Rogan’s podcast.
- Show wrap and Dale’s afternoon show preview [00:48:51] — Dale announces he won’t be on the Sideshow today and promotes his afternoon debut on 590 AM/99.7 FM.
Recurring Bits
- The Sideshow [00:48:51] — Dale announces he’s skipping the Sideshow due to his afternoon show schedule
Guests
- Mark Shaw (expert) [00:19:01] — CEO of Ultra-Ever Dry, the company that licenses and markets hydrophobic nanotechnology coatings including pee-repellent paint; did not actually invent the product
Callers
- Brandon [00:36:00] — Warning about TED Talk’s cult-like treatment of speakers Provided context about Eddie Huang and Graham Hancock’s negative experiences with TED Talk organization on Joe Rogan podcast
Quotes
This is like booking the CEO of Jif instead of George Washington Carver.
Bob Fonseca [00:12:04]
Daniel, you just booked a guy who sells it. You booked a guy who’s busy.
Dale Dudley [00:23:02]
We know now how Jesus really did it. Right on the bottom of his feet.
Mark Shaw [00:24:47]
I plan on being, I’m discriminating against people. That’s the first.
Dale Dudley [00:44:35]