Dudley and Bob with Matt — 93.7 KLBJ-FM, Austin — Monday, May 11, 2015
This Show
Part 1: Bridges and Blues
The Monday morning show opens with weather talk as rain approaches Austin, then quickly devolves into a long segment on mispronunciation (‘anonymous’ vs ‘unanimous’) and Carissa judging the Funniest Person in Austin contest. Dale discusses scary bridges around the world, his Periscope obsession, and his weekend at Topgolf with Kevin Nealon. The team also discusses a crying room hotel in Japan and Dale’s Clash of Clans clan welcoming him back with tribute bases.
Segments
- Show open and weather talk [00:00:00] — The show opens with discussion of rain and flooding across Texas, particularly north of Austin. Dale mentions Williamson County is in a ‘no man’s land’ between heavy storms.
- Creepy realtor text messages [00:02:43] — Dale’s wife and other realtors are receiving sexually explicit messages from a creep with a 203 area code. The hosts discuss whether it’s a scam or just harassment.
- Branson trip planning [00:08:12] — The hosts discuss a potential couples trip to Branson to see a Carpenters tribute show, though schedules may not align.
- Funniest Person in Austin judging controversy [00:09:01] — Carissa reveals she judged the Funniest Person in Austin semifinals. Bob is confused why top comics didn’t advance. Discussion of judging process and political correctness concerns.
- The ‘Anonymous’ mispronunciation [00:14:05] — Carissa repeatedly mispronounces ‘unanimous’ as ‘anonymous,’ leading to an extended segment on word confusion that makes her uncomfortable but becomes comedy gold.
- Waco siege education gap [00:19:28] — Carissa reveals she went to school in Waco during the Branch Davidian siege but was never taught about it, leading to discussion of what schools hide from students.
- Scary bridges around the world [00:21:35] — Dale discusses the Ishima Ohashi bridge in Japan and other terrifying bridges, triggered by memories of his father’s fear of the Beaumont-Port Arthur bridge. The segment includes discussion of the Tacoma Narrows Bridge collapse.
- Japanese crying room hotel [00:33:04] — Dale shares an article about a Tokyo hotel offering discounted ‘crying rooms’ for women, complete with tear-jerking films, soft tissues, and manga comics designed to help combat stress.
- Clash of Clans tribute bases [00:36:00] — Dale’s former Clash of Clans clanmates built tribute bases begging him to return, including one that says ‘come back Dale’ with suggestive imagery. Dale has rejoined the clan.
- Kevin Nealon at Topgolf [00:38:29] — Bob deflects questions about his celebrity weekend with Kevin Nealon and Pat Hazel at Topgolf. Dale attended with his family, emphasizing the difficulty of taking a three-year-old to Topgolf.
- Periscope complaint about cursing [00:40:00] — Dale received his first complaint on Periscope after cursing while calling out a left-lane driver. Someone from Wales criticized him for speaking that way in front of his children, which Dale defends.
- Show promos and upcoming events [00:45:14] — Dale promotes X Games passes, an upcoming toll road interview, the cruise, and a May 28th cruise cast at Cap City Comedy Club from 5-7pm.
Quotes
Never take a three-year-old to Topgolf.
Dale Dudley [00:08:16]
Anonymous. Third time. You got it.
Bob Fonseca [00:15:14]
My kids don’t live in a mythical world where nobody curses.
Dale Dudley [00:41:18]
Part 2: Bird Squawks
The show discusses Carissa’s disabled pet bird that constantly squawks, driving her mother to yelling at it. Audio is played of both the bird screeching and Carissa’s mom losing it, with the hosts joking about the chaos of the McAtee household, which also has chickens living inside. Dale rants about furniture shopping with his wife and the frustrations of salespeople, financing schemes, and his fear of spending money. The segment ends with discussion of Texas political news and a viral video of a graduation ceremony gone wrong.
Segments
- Periscope Discussion [00:00:00] — Dale discusses using the Periscope live streaming app and mentions Carissa posted a video over the weekend.
- The Bird Squawks [00:02:12] — Dale plays Carissa’s Periscope video of her disabled pet bird constantly screeching. The hosts react to the incessant noise and discuss the bird living with Carissa’s parents.
- Carissa’s Mom Loses It [00:04:43] — Audio is played of Carissa’s family discussing getting rid of the bird, with her mother completely losing her temper and yelling ‘shut up!’ repeatedly at the bird in the background.
- The McAtee Household Zoo [00:06:42] — The hosts discover Carissa’s parents also have chickens living in the den of their house. Dale and the others are baffled by the chaos, including previous pets like an iguana and sugar glider.
- Chupacabra vs Fox Debate [00:09:12] — Carissa tells the story of how something killed chickens at her father’s farm, insisting it couldn’t have been a fox. The hosts mock her for suggesting it might have been a chupacabra.
- Dale’s Furniture Shopping Anxiety [00:17:25] — Dale describes his stressful Mother’s Day weekend trying to shop for furniture with his wife, including visits to Sears outlet, Rooms To Go, and Macy’s, experiencing sales tactics and delivery fees that paralyzed him with fear.
- Five Miles App Confusion [00:21:30] — Dale reads messages from someone on the Five Miles app who didn’t understand his free ticket giveaway and called him names, then gave him a one-star review when corrected.
- Tyler Texas Politicians [00:41:13] — Dale discusses Texas Representative Kevin Eltife’s medical marijuana bill that only covers epilepsy, and Matt Schaefer’s amendment banning late-term abortions even for severe fetal abnormalities.
- Daylight Savings Time Bill Fails [00:48:15] — The hosts discuss how the Texas House defeated a bill to end daylight savings time because a lawmaker said he didn’t want to choose between church and watching the Dallas Cowboys.
- Viral Graduation Video [00:51:16] — The show plays and reacts to a viral video of a Georgia charter school principal who forgot the valedictorian speech, then made a racist comment when families started leaving the ceremony.
Quotes
You know what that bird’s saying don’t you? Kill me.
Dale Dudley [00:03:13]
Chickens is a barnyard animal. It’s food. They can’t be trained.
Dale Dudley [00:12:54]
Look who’s leaving all the black people
Principal (in video) [00:55:00]
Part 3: Mopac Man
Steve Pestelnik from the Central Texas Mobility Authority visits to discuss and defend the Mopac toll lane project. Dale, Bob, and Matt challenge him on toll road costs, the lack of sunset dates, and whether lower-income people really support tolls. The segment includes a full phone bank of listener questions and complaints. After Steve leaves, the hosts watch and mock a viral video of drunk women being ejected from a Leann Womack concert in Dallas.
Segments
- Show Maintenance and Cruise Promo [00:00:11] — Dale promotes the European cruise, the film festival coming June 24th, and X Games ticket giveaways before introducing the guest.
- Steve Pestelnik Introduction [00:02:41] — Steve Pestelnik from the Central Texas Regional Mobility Authority arrives wearing a hard hat and safety vest as a joke. He is the Mopac spokesperson.
- Why So Many Toll Roads? [00:03:51] — Steve explains the gas tax has not been raised in 20 years, fuel-efficient cars mean less revenue, and Texas growth demands new funding sources.
- Tolls and the Middle Class [00:05:43] — Dale challenges Steve on whether anyone has considered that salaries are stagnant and tolls are burdening the middle class and below.
- Will the Tolls Ever Come Down? [00:06:43] — Dale asks if there is a date when Mopac tolls will be removed, referencing old Dallas turnpikes. Steve says they won’t promise what they can’t guarantee.
- Mopac Capacity and Design [00:08:13] — Bob asks about Mopac traffic projections (180,000 to 320,000 cars) and what long-term solutions exist beyond one toll lane. Steve discusses the rail right-of-way and express buses.
- Mass Transit Future [00:10:51] — Bob suggests Central Texans will eventually have to accept mass transit. Steve agrees transit will play a greater role as congestion worsens.
- Variable Tolling Explained [00:12:00] — Matt asks how the sliding-scale toll will work. Steve says digital signs will show the price, and a person (eventually a computer) will monitor and adjust it.
- Lower-Income Support for Tolls [00:15:49] — Steve claims surveys show moderate and lower-income people support toll lanes because they offer reliability when needed. Dale is skeptical and asks to see the study.
- Listener Calls Begin [00:16:00] — Dale opens the phone lines. Callers ask about work-from-home incentives, enforcement, speed limits on frontage roads, lack of HOV lanes, billing issues, and more.
- Steve’s Radio Background [00:21:56] — Steve reveals he worked in radio at WDBO in Orlando before moving into his current role.
- The Spain Myth [00:26:00] — Steve debunks the urban myth that Spanish companies own Austin toll roads. Only SH 130 south has a Spanish concession agreement; the state owns the land.
- Steve Wraps Up [00:39:31] — Steve gives the Mopac Express website, hotline, and Twitter handle, estimates lanes will open later in 2015 or 2016, and asks for patience during the learning curve.
- Brazilian TV Twister [00:41:04] — Dale tries to show a Facebook video of a risqué Brazilian game show but the office internet is too slow to load it properly.
- Dale’s Kids Play Gardening [00:43:38] — Dale recounts how his kids and a neighbor took yard tools and ‘gardened’ the rental house, cutting hoses and raking mulch into the yard.
- Drunk Women Ejected from Leann Womack Show [00:46:55] — The hosts watch and mock a viral video of two intoxicated women arguing with staff after being kicked out of a Leann Womack concert at the Kessler Theater in Dallas for talking during the show.
Guests
- Steve Pestelnik (expert) [00:02:41] — Spokesperson for the Central Texas Regional Mobility Authority, specifically the Mopac project. Defended toll road policy and answered listener questions.
Callers
- Tommy [00:16:01] — Suggested companies incentivize employees to work from home or stagger shifts to reduce traffic Steve acknowledged the idea and noted the express lane pricing changes will incentivize off-peak travel
- Steve (caller) [00:18:04] — Asked about toll booth billing delays and whether text tags work on all toll roads Steve said pay-by-mail is not optimal but better than cash collection. Caller’s issue was outside Steve’s jurisdiction
- Terry [00:18:52] — Regular toll road user; asked how to reduce semi-truck congestion on I-35 Steve explained most I-35 traffic is local, not through-traffic, so beltways help the region more than downtown
- Tyler (on south Mopac (driving)) [00:22:23] — Asked where the exits are on the new toll lane and whether getting on/off will slow regular traffic Steve explained it is designed as an express lane with limited entry/exit points and an underpass to minimize disruption
- Lauren (formerly Leander) [00:24:49] — Challenged Steve’s claim that lower-income people support toll roads; mentioned the lottery was supposed to pay for roads Steve cited surveys of existing express lanes and said the option benefits people with inflexible schedules. Lauren remained skeptical
- Chip [00:30:25] — Asked why SH 130 does not allow permit loads (oversized vehicles) Steve said oversized vehicles damage the road, but admitted he is not up to speed on 130 policy since he only handles Mopac
- Jim [00:31:56] — Said speed limits were lowered on 183 frontage roads after 130 was built, contradicting Steve’s earlier statement Steve explained speed limits are set by the 85th percentile and commercial development can justify lower limits
- Clayton [00:34:22] — Asked why there are no frontage roads between 1431 and Cypress Creek on 183A, and why tolls never get paid off Steve explained they were unsure 183A would be financially feasible with free lanes alongside it; later projects added frontage roads
- Sean [00:37:07] — Asked why Mopac is not an HOV lane and why they are building on roads already paid for Steve said HOV is hard to enforce and wastes capacity; the $200 million expansion is new infrastructure being paid for by toll users
Quotes
How are y’all paying the TV stations to never ask the hard-hitting questions?
Dale Dudley [00:03:02]
If you’re gonna give me a toll road, let me drive whatever speed I want.
Dale Dudley [00:08:42]
There’s nothing great about it, Steve.
Dale Dudley [00:13:58]
People of lower income appreciate having that option available to them.
Steve Pestelnik [00:15:49]
There are no toll roads in Austin that were ever owned by any Spanish company.
Steve Pestelnik [00:28:40]