Dudley and Bob with Matt — 93.7 KLBJ-FM, Austin — Monday, April 17, 2017
This Show
- Black Widows & Shouting
- Obama Conspiracies & Christian Sex
- Planes, Bidets & David and Shelly from Weird Homes Tour
Part 1: Black Widows & Shouting
Dale Dudley starts the show tired after waking at 2:30 AM, discussing his Easter brunch at Lucy’s where the staff recognized him and comped his meal, which triggers jealousy from Bob. The segment derails into a lengthy, heated argument about spiders after Daniel mentions seeing a black widow at a campground, with Dale and Bob increasingly frustrated by spider tangents. Dale eventually forces a reset and runs an Animal Cavalcade featuring wedding puppies, a talking raven, bird-eating dogs, a giraffe birth, kangaroos on a golf course, goat yoga, and squirrel sex.
Segments
- Podcast Migration Announcement [00:00:00] — Bob reads an announcement about the show moving to a new iTunes feed, warning the old one will be gone by May 1st.
- Show Open and Dale’s Sleepless Night [00:01:00] — Bob introduces the cast. Dale reveals he woke at 2:30 AM and took a long bath instead of sleeping.
- Bob’s Jury Duty Confusion [00:03:00] — Dale thought Bob would be out for jury duty, but Bob must only call in at 10:30 AM. He hopes to get seated on a major case being tried that afternoon.
- Easter Weekend and Lucy’s Visit [00:06:00] — Dale recounts his Easter Sunday date with his wife, driving through Balcones area to Lucy’s fried chicken restaurant by Lake Travis.
- Black Widow Spider Derailment [00:09:00] — Daniel mentions seeing a black widow at Sandy Creek campground, completely derailing Dale’s story and triggering extended spider discussion.
- Lucy’s Meal and Bob’s Jealousy [00:12:00] — Dale finishes his story: Lucy’s staff comped his meal because they were fans. Bob is upset because someone was mean to him at the same location days earlier.
- Sandy Creek Campground Debate [00:16:00] — Discussion of whether Daniel can return to the campground after seeing a spider, plus debate about whether Sandy Creek is in Travis or Williamson County.
- Spider Education and Venom Debate [00:17:00] — Extended discussion of black widows vs brown recluse, daddy long legs, spider identification, with Daniel writing about spiders for LiveStrong.com.
- Cody the Perfect Camper [00:22:00] — Daniel and Daniel’s wife mention Cody, a fellow camper who caught a rattlesnake, had a beautiful fire, and gave them firewood.
- Dale Forces Show Reset [00:24:00] — Dale becomes increasingly frustrated with spider talk, yells at Daniel and Carissa to stop, apologizes but demands they do actual radio.
- Last Person from 1800s Dies [00:28:00] — Dale reports that Emma Morano, 117, the last person born in the 1800s, has died in Italy. Violet Brown, born in 1900, is now the oldest.
- Animal Cavalcade [00:33:00] — Dale runs through animal videos: wedding with adoptable puppies instead of bouquets, talking raven, family dog eating rescued bird, snake at Waller Creek.
- Animal Cavalcade Continues [00:39:00] — April the giraffe gives birth, kangaroos on golf course, goat yoga class, squirrels in threesome, necrophiliac squirrel.
Recurring Bits
- Animal Cavalcade [00:33:00] — Extended segment featuring wedding puppies, talking raven, bird-eating dog, snake footage, giraffe birth, kangaroos, goat yoga, and squirrel mating
Callers
- Donnie [00:28:00] — Called about imitation spiders that look like black widows for defense purposes, suggesting Daniel probably saw a fake Brief call, Dale agrees it’s probably true but dismisses it quickly
Quotes
I’m clean. I wouldn’t take a test now. Wouldn’t at all.
Dale Dudley [00:02:30]
If you see a black widow in the studio, you could never come back to work.
Bob Fonseca [00:16:00]
I was up at three o’clock in the morning planning this show!
Dale Dudley [00:24:00]
Stop being on his team all the time!
Dale Dudley [00:30:00]
Part 2: Obama Conspiracies & Christian Sex
The hosts discuss Alex Jones’ custody battle where his lawyer claims he is a ‘performance artist’, sparking debate about his authenticity. They also talk about Obama conspiracy theories, analyze fast food items, debate sexual education and abstinence, and review various food topics including hot dogs and barbecue. Matt has jury duty and hopes to get on the Alex Jones case.
Segments
- Podcast Migration Announcement [00:00:00] — Announcement about the show moving to a new iTunes feed, with the old feed ending May 1st.
- Promotion Rundown [00:00:32] — Dale reviews upcoming promotions including MotoGP tickets, Monster Jam tickets, and Moon Tower Comedy Fest.
- Fake News – Twins Story [00:02:41] — Dale reads a fake news story from Mississippi Herald about twins who married each other, gets called out by Matt for not checking sources.
- Alex Jones Custody Battle [00:11:17] — Discussion of Alex Jones’ custody case where his lawyer argues he is a ‘performance artist’, not actually believing what he says on air. Matt has jury duty and hopes to get seated on the case.
- Obama Conspiracy Theories [00:16:26] — The hosts play and mock InfoWars clips claiming Obama’s daughters aren’t really his, Michelle is a man, and other conspiracy theories. Discussion about racism underlying many Obama conspiracies.
- God Squad – Elderly Caller on Sex Education [00:28:59] — Dale plays audio from his AM show where an elderly caller named Joseph claims young women engage in anal sex to preserve virginity and avoid pregnancy. The hosts debate whether this is actually common.
- Fast Food Fanatic [00:38:18] — Discussion of various fast food items including Totino’s 4/20 commercial, Pizza Hut burgers in Cyprus, Carl’s Jr. baby back rib burger, and Dairy Queen birthday promotion.
- Best Hot Dogs by State [00:48:58] — Review of a map ranking best hot dogs in every state. Frank in Austin wins for Texas. Daniel doesn’t understand the assignment and keeps talking about grocery store hot dogs.
- Fruit Rankings and Barbecue Sauce [00:52:00] — Brief discussion of fruit rankings (pineapple #1) and debate about barbecue sauce, with Daniel sweating just thinking about it.
- GOP Candidate Bar Incident [00:56:54] — News clip about New Jersey GOP candidate Brian McDowell making vulgar proposition to woman in bar while drunk, losing party endorsement.
Recurring Bits
- Fast Food Fanatic [00:38:18] — Discussion of various fast food items including burgers with ribs, pizza buns, and Totino’s 4/20 commercial
- God Squad [00:28:59] — Discussion of sex education and abstinence, triggered by Dale’s AM show caller talking about anal sex to preserve virginity
Callers
- Joseph [00:30:05] — Sex education, claiming young women engage in anal sex to preserve virginity and avoid pregnancy Dale disagrees based on personal experience, hosts debate whether this is actually common among high schoolers
- unnamed (moved to Texas about a year ago) [00:35:24] — Abstinence-only sex education in Texas Brief discussion about Obama’s approach to sex ed, hosts can’t determine how caller found the show
- Devin [00:36:02] — Dated a Catholic girl who engaged in anal sex to preserve virginity Confirms the caller Joseph’s claim, leads to extended discussion about the practice and religious justifications
Quotes
He’s playing a character. He’s a performance artist.
Dale Dudley [00:12:41]
A good portion of Americans found anything to stake their racism in.
Dale Dudley [00:17:14]
I was single 18 years and I was a horrible womanizer. The worst of the worst.
Dale Dudley [00:31:01]
God goes, I want to thank you for taking it in that hole.
Dale Dudley [00:36:46]
Part 3: Planes, Bidets & David and Shelly from Weird Homes Tour
Part 3 features a wide-ranging discussion covering toilet travel destinations, airline controversies, North Korea speculation, and a main guest segment with David and Shelly promoting the Austin Weird Homes Tour (April 22-23, 2017). Hosts discuss scorpion stings on planes, airline seating complaints, psychics, ghosts, and religion. Technical issues with video playback and Dale’s computer continue to be a recurring frustration. The show wraps with banter about taxes, prescription drugs, and an upcoming Moon Tower Comedy Festival podcast.
Segments
- Podcast migration announcement [00:00:00] — Pre-show announcement about the podcast moving to a new iTunes feed, with the old one being discontinued by May 1st.
- Google Home hack discussion [00:01:02] — Caller explains how Burger King’s ad activated Google Home devices and was quickly patched by Google, then asks Matt for North Korea predictions.
- Fast Food Fanatic and pooping around the world [00:02:36] — Dale introduces a clickbait article about 12 destination toilets around the world for travelers who love scenic bathrooms.
- United Airlines scorpion sting [00:11:25] — Discussion of a passenger stung by a scorpion on a United flight from Houston to Calgary, with hosts sharing their own scorpion and wasp sting experiences.
- Airline seating controversy [00:17:12] — Dale plays news clip about a mother outraged that American Airlines separated her from her young daughter after a last-minute ticket purchase. Hosts debate whether her complaint is justified.
- Casino cruise ships return [00:20:33] — Discussion of gambling boats that sail out to international waters, including memories of doing a promotion on one in the early 1990s, possibly at South Padre Island.
- David and Shelly – Weird Homes Tour [00:23:53] — Main guest segment: David and Shelly from Austin Weird Homes Tour promote their April 22-23 event featuring five new homes, including houses with psychics, artists, and shipping containers.
- Psychics and supernatural beliefs [00:29:02] — Extended conversation about Shelly’s belief in psychics (including a pet psychic), ghosts vs. UFOs, Dale’s skepticism, and differing religious views among hosts and guests.
- Shelly’s salon and expanding businesses [00:39:43] — Matt reveals Shelly left the floor at her Urban Betty salon to manage multiple businesses. Discussion of their growing empire and plans for children.
- Delta bumping compensation [00:48:38] — Brief discussion of Delta offering up to $9,500 to passengers who volunteer to be bumped, with Bob worrying costs will be passed to consumers.
- Car crashes into West Austin condo [00:49:08] — Hosts review dramatic photos and news footage of a car crashing underneath a condo on Scenic Drive, causing balconies to collapse. Code enforcement on scene draws sarcastic commentary.
- Austin code enforcement trucks [00:52:58] — Dale criticizes code enforcement vehicle branding (‘Preserving Austin’s Quality of Life’) and compares to Williamson County Constable vehicles with giant crosses.
- Tax season and partnership money [00:53:27] — Dale working on taxes triggers argument with Bob about how they split appearance fees and whether Bob shorts him $50 on the tax burden.
Recurring Bits
- Fast Food Fanatic [00:02:36] — Mentioned by Dale when reviewing show rundown, noting Daniel did this segment earlier
Guests
- David (other) [00:23:53] — Co-organizer of Austin Weird Homes Tour, returning to promote the April 22-23, 2017 event with five new houses
- Shelly (other) [00:23:53] — Co-organizer of Weird Homes Tour and owner of Urban Betty salon, discussed psychics, ghosts, and expanding their businesses
Callers
- unnamed [00:01:02] — Google Home being activated by Burger King ad, then asked Matt for North Korea predictions Matt joked the caller should Google his Twitter handle instead of answering the North Korea question seriously
Text Line
- [00:22:35] Michael says Dale should be more concerned about the airline mother and child separation story — read by Dale Dudley Dale dismisses it as possibly a setup for a lawsuit, thanks Michael sarcastically and moves on
- [00:40:38] Bob’s wife texted that she wants to go to the Weird Homes Tour — read by Bob Fonseca Prompted discussion of who would attend the tour this weekend
Quotes
I will tell you the neighbors came out and I think a neighbor urinated on my foot
Matt Bearden [00:12:57]
They appeal to a misery index to get people to buy more comfort items
Dale Dudley [00:19:48]
You know what that guy said when he got out? Get off me homes!
Matt Bearden [00:50:22]