Dudley and Bob with Matt — 93.7 KLBJ-FM, Austin — Thursday, October 27, 2016
This Show
Part 1: No More Austin Monthly For Dale
Dale opens the show exhausted after a chaotic night: his son Jacob sleepwalked into his bedroom three times, his wife thought the doorbell rang at 3:45 a.m. (it didn’t), and he got zero sleep. He also announces his resignation from Austin Monthly, explaining it was more about the column feeling ‘old hat’ than any conflict, though he admits he may have burned a bridge. The show features Animal Cavalcade with stories including a woman in New York killed and eaten by her dogs, a spider carrying a mouse, and anticipation for a therapy horse visit later in the show. Political banter about Trump vs. Clinton continues, and the cast listens to isolated vocal tracks from Rod Stewart and Freddie Mercury.
Segments
- Show Open [00:00:09] — Standard show introduction featuring the cast and station information.
- Dale’s Sleepless Night [00:01:21] — Dale recounts a terrible night: son Jacob sleepwalked into the bedroom three times, wife Amanda thought the doorbell rang at 3:45 a.m. (it was a dream), and no one got any rest.
- Austin Monthly Resignation [00:08:04] — Dale announces he resigned from Austin Monthly yesterday. He explains it wasn’t about rejection or mistreatment, but that the column had become ‘old hat’ and no longer fit his life. He admits the resignation was accepted quickly and he may have burned a bridge.
- Election Talk / Matt Massillo [00:20:58] — Dale discusses busting balls with Bob’s friend Matt Massillo on Facebook over election polls. The race is tightening slightly, but Dale maintains Hillary will win. Political banter ensues.
- Alex Jones Fish People Clip [00:24:47] — Dale plays a clip of Alex Jones claiming a genetic engineer told him about human-fish hybrids with gills in tanks in England. The crew mocks the absurdity.
- Vocal Track Mashups [00:28:12] — The show plays isolated vocal tracks: a mashup of Bastille and Smash Mouth, Ronnie Van Zant’s ‘Simple Man,’ Rod Stewart’s a cappella ‘Gasoline Alley,’ and Freddie Mercury and David Bowie’s ‘Under Pressure.’
- Harry’s Razors Spot [00:35:31] — Dale and Bob deliver a sponsored read for Harry’s razors using the code ‘Dudley.’
- Animal Cavalcade [00:36:54] — The recurring segment features: a dog howling at taps, porch hands (raccoons under a deck), dogs dreaming about their owners, Chicago Zoo naming a baby camel Alexander Camelton, a spider carrying a mouse, and a New York woman killed and eaten by her dogs.
- Chapman Motors / Kimmery Lens Nostalgia [00:43:52] — Matt recalls Chapman Motors commercials featuring Kimmery Lens, lamenting the loss as worse than the Armadillo or Liberty Lunch closing.
Recurring Bits
- Animal Cavalcade [00:36:54] — Multiple animal news stories including patriotic dog, raccoons under a deck, dogs dreaming about owners, spider with mouse, and woman killed by her dogs in New York.
Quotes
Jacob, what are you doing? I had a bad dream. He’s just standing there.
Dale Dudley [00:03:02]
I resigned yesterday from Austin monthly. It was old hat. It wasn’t working in my life anymore.
Dale Dudley [00:08:10]
I got humanoids crossed with fish in tanks, gulping and clawing. We are screwed people.
Alex Jones (clip) [00:24:24]
A woman in New York City passed away and was eaten by her dogs.
Dale Dudley [00:46:00]
Part 2: Bernard, The Therapy Mini-Horse!
Dale delivers a heartfelt on-air apology about resigning from his Austin Monthly column, realizing the decision was about creative burnout rather than editorial conflicts. The show touches on DNA ancestry revealing uncomfortable family history of slave ownership, debates about sexual assault allegations in the presidential race, and features a spirited Megyn Kelly/Newt Gingrich interview. A therapy mini-horse named Bernard is scheduled to visit the studio later in the show.
Segments
- Dale’s Grown-Up Moment [00:00:01] — Dale apologizes for yesterday’s rant about Austin Monthly, explaining he realized the problem was his own creative burnout, not the magazine. He sent a respectful resignation email.
- DNA and Slavery [00:08:38] — Dale shares discovering through DNA testing that his Revolutionary War ancestor William Glover owned slaves, tracing his family’s racism back generations. He reflects on inherited bias and the responsibility to change it.
- Quita Culpepper Name Tag Mishap [00:14:05] — Dale shows how Blackshear Elementary misspelled news anchor Quita Culpepper’s name as ‘Squida’ on her visitor badge.
- Gordon Ramsay at Franklin Barbecue [00:15:30] — Discussion of Gordon Ramsay visiting Austin and cutting the line at Franklin Barbecue. Dale expresses frustration at missing the celebrity chef he admires.
- Jim Baker’s Doomsday Sales Pitch [00:19:30] — The show plays clips of televangelist Jim Baker selling survival gear and predicting nuclear war, comparing it to comic book ads that disappoint.
- UT Affirmative Action Bake Sale [00:25:26] — Coverage of Young Conservatives of Texas holding a controversial bake sale charging different prices by race, which Dale criticizes as misunderstanding affirmative action.
- 19-Year-Old Plays Youth Football [00:40:57] — News story about a 19-year-old man caught playing on a 13-14 year old football team. Dale jokes about how fun it would be to dominate kids.
- Most American Video Ever [00:44:03] — Dale shows video of man chugging beer, firing gun, and receiving oral sex while yelling ‘America’ – deemed the most American video ever recorded.
- The League Kitchen Sponsor Read [00:50:09] — Bob delivers sponsor read for The League Kitchen and Tavern, mentioning their locations and menu items.
- Bernard the Horse Preview [00:51:20] — Carissa mentions seeing a picture of Bernard the therapy mini-horse who is scheduled to visit at 8:31. Dale asks staff to notify front desk about incoming horse.
- Cubs World Series Prediction [00:51:49] — Story about Mike Lee who predicted in his 1993 yearbook that the Cubs would win the 2016 World Series.
- Megyn Kelly vs. Newt Gingrich [00:54:03] — Extended play and discussion of heated Fox News interview where Megyn Kelly challenges Newt Gingrich about Trump sexual assault allegations and he accuses her of being fascinated with sex.
Guests
- Bernard (therapy mini-horse) (other) [00:51:27] — Scheduled to appear at 8:31 with owner Tanya, has purple hair according to Carissa
Callers
- Damian [00:28:52] — Called to compliment Dale’s Alex Jones impression Brief positive call, Dale joked back in Alex Jones voice about vitamins
- Lance [00:30:50] — Unknown – call dropped or disconnected immediately Never got through or was immediately disconnected
Quotes
I’ve never been able to break up with somebody. Change is really hard for me.
Dale Dudley [00:04:03]
There it is – where we learned to be horrific human beings.
Dale Dudley [00:36:06]
Sounds like William Glover’s blood still flows freely.
Matt Bearden [00:44:13]
You can take your anger issues and spend some time working on them, Mr. Speaker.
Megyn Kelly [01:01:41]
Part 3: Maserati swooning
The show featured two in-studio guests: Martha, who brings her miniature therapy horse Bernard to visit her North Austin neighborhood and has been repeatedly reported to code enforcement despite being in compliance, and Tanya Billasoli from Maserati of Austin, following up on Dale’s visit to the dealership. Dale swooned over Tanya throughout the interview, asking about her weight loss transformation, bodybuilding, and whether wealthy customers hit on her. The show wrapped with leftover videos including a rapper throwing cash at homeless people and bike ramp failures.
Segments
- Martha and Bernard the miniature horse arrive [00:00:00] — Martha brings her therapy miniature horse Bernard into the studio. She’s been dealing with anonymous code enforcement complaints from a neighbor despite being in compliance with city codes allowing a gelded miniature horse.
- Tanya from Maserati arrives [00:13:03] — Tanya Billasoli, the Maserati saleswoman Dale met earlier in the week, comes to the studio. Dale gushes over her appearance and asks increasingly personal questions about her weight loss, relationships, and dealing with wealthy customers.
- Post-interview discussion and plugs [00:34:00] — After Tanya leaves, the hosts discuss the interview and plug upcoming events including the Christmas live podcast at Cap City Comedy Club on December 14th.
- Leftover viral videos [00:47:03] — Dale shares videos from the previous day including a rapper throwing $30k at homeless people, a man biting a lighter in half, double bicycle ramp failure, and Yoko Ono trolling The Simpsons with an art installation.
Recurring Bits
- The Sideshow [00:45:00] — Dale announces the annual Christmas live podcast recording at Cap City Comedy Club, December 14th, tickets selling fast
Guests
- Martha (other) [00:00:00] — North Austin resident dealing with code enforcement complaints about her miniature therapy horse Bernard who visits special needs children
- Bernard (other) [00:00:00] — 12-year-old miniature therapy horse brought into studio, works with special needs children through Hearts and Hooves organization
- Tanya Billasoli (other) [00:13:03] — Maserati saleswoman following up after Dale visited the dealership; discussed her weight loss journey, bodybuilding competitions, and dealing with wealthy customers
- Amanda (Dale’s wife) (other) [00:13:00] — Dale’s wife sat in studio to monitor his behavior during Tanya interview
Quotes
I think you should have to answer when you have a problem with somebody, be a man or be a woman, step up
Dale Dudley [00:03:30]
As a nation, we’ve become really terrible losers
Daniel Gallo [00:04:46]
Somebody is actually eating a heart sandwich this morning somewhere in Central Texas
Dale Dudley [00:19:49]
I’m just not impressed by that (money)
Tanya Billasoli [00:22:18]