Dudley and Bob with Matt — 93.7 KLBJ-FM, Austin — Friday, October 28, 2016
This Show
- Dale Snail Mail and Flying Frenchman
- Pop Cop and Crooked politicians
- Billy Dee Washington in the house!
Part 1: Dale Snail Mail and Flying Frenchman
Dale discusses ending his newspaper column, receives two letters from former editors offering support. The show plays a Five Finger Death Punch cover of ‘Bad Company’ that Dale enjoys. Fast Food Fanatic features scorpion pizza, Arby’s venison sandwich, and Burger King’s McDonald’s ghost costume. Dale discusses his family history with slavery and shares a wingsuit BASE jumping video. Carissa opens up about relationship stress.
Segments
- Opening and Dale’s Column News [00:00:00] — Show opens with standard intro. Dale discusses receiving supportive messages from former editors Karina Magyar and Aaron Quinn Kong about his writing after his newspaper column ended.
- Five Finger Death Punch Cover Discussion [00:02:54] — Dale plays and discusses Five Finger Death Punch’s cover of Bad Company. The group debates whether cover songs can improve on originals.
- Snail Mail Letter [00:09:19] — Dale receives a physical letter from Smithville, Texas. The hosts speculate about its contents before opening it live on air. It turns out to be praise for Dale’s 2-3pm show and his logical, non-political approach.
- Squatty Potty Research Study [00:18:12] — Daniel is encouraged to participate in a University of Texas study about squatty potty usage. The hosts joke about the $10 compensation and motion-capture markers.
- Italian Food Debate [00:21:29] — Discussion about authentic Italian food versus Italian-American food, including whether spaghetti and meatballs is truly Italian.
- Daring Daniel Concept [00:23:08] — Dale proposes ‘Daring Daniel’ bit using exposure therapy to work Daniel up from ziplines to eventually skydiving and BASE jumping. Shows wingsuit BASE jumping video of Eric DeSanto Shamano.
- Dale’s Family History [00:30:50] — Dale discusses researching his great-great-great-great grandfather’s Revolutionary War-era will, which documents the purchase of enslaved children named Polly and others. He expresses concern about what happened to them.
- Fast Food Fanatic [00:34:28] — Segment covers scorpion pizza at a state fair, Japanese ramen restaurant with no human interaction in Brooklyn, KFC’s ‘Chizza’ (chicken pizza) in Japan, Arby’s venison sandwich in select states, and Burger King dressing as a McDonald’s ghost for Halloween.
- Carissa’s Relationship Talk [00:43:21] — Carissa opens up about feeling stressed, having no free time, and relationship tension with her boyfriend. The hosts offer advice and jokes about marriage and moving in together.
Recurring Bits
- Fast Food Fanatic [00:34:28] — Daniel leads segment covering scorpion pizza, venison sandwiches at Arby’s, KFC Chizza in Japan, human-free ramen restaurant in Brooklyn, and Burger King’s ghost McDonald’s costume
Music
- Five Finger Death Punch — Cover of Bad Company’s ‘Bad Company’ discussed and played extensively
Quotes
I don’t need to know anyone’s opinion. Being off Twitter absolutely the best decision I’ve ever made.
Dale Dudley [00:09:56]
You have ruined my Friday. I started getting all excited for hate mail.
Matt Bearden [00:16:01]
I have wanted to know what happened to Polly from my great great great great grandfather’s will.
Dale Dudley [00:32:35]
Part 2: Pop Cop and Crooked politicians
This part opens with Pop Cop (Matt doing celebrity news), followed by discussion about Bob’s weight gain. Matt recounts a frustrating $150 haunted house experience with his wife and her ‘second husband’ (a male friend). Dale shares his equally disappointing $500 Sleep No More theater experience in NYC. The show pivots to politics: Dale plays a KXAN investigation revealing Attorney General Ken Paxton’s office collected almost zero restitution for Texas consumers despite settlements, then rants about Paxton being a corrupt official hiding behind Christianity. Pat Robertson’s predictions about the election are mocked, Dale denounces religious leaders supporting Trump, and audio plays of Senator Mark Kirk insulting war veteran Tammy Duckworth’s Thai heritage. The segment ends with Matt promoting his Cringetacular show and Dale asking for Habitat for Humanity donations.
Segments
- Pop Cop Opens [00:00:00] — Matt performs Pop Cop, rattling through celebrity birthdays and news with rapid-fire jokes, including Caitlyn Jenner turning 67, Coolio avoiding jail, and a Texas A&M student arrested for topless drunk driving Snapchat.
- Bob Refuses Sound Effects [00:04:06] — Bob complains about being Matt’s ‘bitch’ for sound effects during Pop Cop. Dale teases Bob about gaining 20 pounds, Bob insists half is muscle. Banter about Bob punching his side to ‘break up fat.’
- Matt’s Haunted House Disaster [00:08:25] — Matt reluctantly went to a haunted house with his wife and her male friend (former student teacher the kids adore). After waiting an hour with a $10 ‘fast pass’ upgrade, he endured drama students screaming, strobe lights, and claustrophobic birth canal obstacles. Total cost: $150 for three people (revealed incrementally as his wife kept hiding the real price).
- Dale’s Sleep No More Nightmare [00:23:00] — Dale counters with his $500 New York theater experience at Sleep No More—an immersive play where male actors only interacted with attractive women, he wore a creepy mask, couldn’t find the exit, and ended up drinking alone at the bar while naked actresses ran from him.
- War on Halloween [00:26:35] — Dale plays news clips: a man biting a hole in an inflatable Halloween cat decoration (caught on security camera falling while fleeing), and controversy over a Halloween display featuring a bloody decapitated Hillary Clinton mask.
- Ken Paxton Consumer Fraud Investigation [00:33:00] — Dale airs a KXAN investigation showing Attorney General Ken Paxton’s office collected only 16% of $650 million owed to consumers, and since 2013 has returned 0.0% to actual victims—money meant for people ripped off by fraud now goes nowhere. Dale calls Paxton a crook hiding behind Christianity.
- Dale’s Election Rant [00:44:00] — Dale unleashes on religious leaders supporting Trump despite him admitting to sexual assault, never quoting scripture, and praising abortion rights until recently. He condemns evangelical hypocrisy, family members supporting Trump, and Ken Paxton’s bathroom bills designed to distract from real child abuse cases.
- Pat Robertson Predicts Trump Win [00:47:19] — Dale plays Pat Robertson claiming polls are skewed, labor won’t support Hillary, and Trump rallies show ‘overwhelming enthusiasm.’ Dale mocks Robertson’s oversized suit and tax-exempt political preaching.
- Mark Kirk Insults War Veteran [00:54:22] — Audio plays of Senator Mark Kirk sarcastically telling double-amputee Iraq war veteran Tammy Duckworth ‘I forgot your parents came all the way from Thailand to serve George Washington’ after she mentioned her family’s Revolutionary War service. Duckworth refuses to respond.
- Matt Promotes Cringetacular Show [00:57:11] — Matt offers guest list spots for his NC-17 rated Cringetacular show at Cap City Tuesday November 1st, warning easily offended people to stay away. Dale asks for Habitat for Humanity donations so his wife can get a free W Hotel stay.
Recurring Bits
- Pop Cop [00:00:11] — Matt performs full Pop Cop segment with celebrity news and rapid jokes. Bob refuses to do sound effects, claiming complaints, leading to banter about his weight.
Text Line
- [00:45:50] Dale’s wife texted Matt saying ‘you’re so mean’ during the show — read by Matt Bearden Matt confused about what he said that was mean, Dale jokes about her having lunch with an attractive musician/realtor
Quotes
My wife has a second husband. He comes through the back door.
Matt Bearden [00:11:11]
I want to say, what’s the name of your improv troupe?
Matt Bearden [00:15:06]
No Maserati guy’s going to go into the general public.
Dale Dudley [00:24:00]
This guy is an absolute scumbag. And no one’s saying it.
Dale Dudley [00:39:01]
Go F yourself. From somebody who’s been sexually abused as a kid.
Dale Dudley [00:50:36]
I forgot your parents came all the way from Thailand to serve George Washington.
Mark Kirk [00:55:00]
Part 3: Billy Dee Washington in the house!
The final part of the October 28, 2016 show features comedian Billy D Washington in studio for an extended visit. The conversation moves from light topics (social media, Chewy’s dating life) to deeper discussions about race, politics, white privilege, family, faith, and Dale’s personal struggles with addiction and childhood trauma. Billy D promotes his weekend shows at Cap City Comedy Club.
Segments
- Dale’s Facebook Argument [00:00:00] — Dale discusses posting about his childhood sexual assault on Facebook in response to someone from Valente asking why he’s voting Democrat. The cast questions whether this was appropriate for social media.
- H Fest Promotion [00:02:56] — Discussion of H Fest, a Halloween bash at Delta Millworks benefiting the American Red Cross, put on by listeners who have participated in show events before.
- Chewy’s Love Life Dissection [00:04:10] — Daniel reveals details about Chewy’s recent date that went badly, making hand gestures about the woman and mentioning she acted strangely when smoking weed. The conversation spirals as Daniel keeps digging himself deeper.
- Topless Snapchat DWI Crash [00:14:04] — News story about an A&M student who crashed into a police car while taking a topless selfie for her boyfriend, with an open bottle of wine in the car.
- Billy D Washington Arrives [00:20:23] — Comedian Billy D Washington joins the show. Initial conversation about names, his appearance, and confusion about whether he was supposed to be on an earlier Hawaii trip.
- Hawaii Trip Revelation [00:24:02] — Billy D apologizes for not going on the show’s Hawaii trip years ago because another comedian who had wronged him was also scheduled. Turns out that comedian wasn’t actually on the trip.
- Marriage and Family [00:28:56] — Billy D discusses his 28-year marriage, his kids (son at UT, daughter recently married), and how to make a long relationship work. Dale discusses his relationship with Amanda.
- Chief Acevedo Friendship Competition [00:30:04] — Dale and Billy D compete over who is better friends with Austin Police Chief Art Acevedo, leading to discussion of the chief’s difficult position.
- White Privilege and Superiority Complex [00:35:05] — Billy D asks if white men have a superiority complex. Extended discussion about privilege, racism versus political correctness, and how Trump has emboldened bigotry disguised as anti-PC sentiment.
- Dale’s Ancestry DNA Results [00:42:22] — Dale discusses discovering through DNA testing that his ancestor was a Revolutionary War hero who also bought child slaves. He connects this to understanding his father’s anger.
- Faith, Moral Code, and Parenting [00:49:00] — Discussion of how the hosts teach morality to their children without organized religion. Billy D talks about giving his kids a biblical foundation. Dale emphasizes respect for women.
- Dale’s Recovery Story [00:51:00] — Dale shares how after his mother’s death in 2005, Amanda came into his life, got pregnant, and ultimately gave him an ultimatum that ended his cocaine addiction. He credits therapy and Amanda with his growth.
- Adoption and Acceptance [00:53:00] — Billy D reveals he was adopted at age four and discusses how this drives comedians’ need for acceptance and makes the stage therapeutic.
- Kids Growing Up [00:57:00] — Billy D talks about his daughter’s wedding, passing the metaphorical key, and how his son at UT won’t even see him when he’s in town. Discussion of empty nesting and aging.
Guests
- Billy D Washington (comedian) [00:20:23] — Stand-up comedian, founding member of the Dudley and Bob approved comedians list, in town performing at Cap City Comedy Club. Extended in-studio conversation covering personal topics including family, faith, race, and mental health.
Callers
- Rob [00:12:07] — Called to ask about the Maserati decision and joked about pleated jeans Got caught in the middle of the Chewy dating discussion and bailed out, telling them to have a good weekend
Quotes
I was raped at 7 and 11 by a sexual predator and I won’t vote for that effing scumbag.
Dale Dudley [00:00:39]
He’s not going against political correctness, he’s being an outright bigot. There’s a difference.
Dale Dudley [00:34:25]
If you ever do this again you’ll never see me and this baby again. That was it. Done.
Dale Dudley [00:51:46]
You constantly crave this acceptance and the more people the better. I am living my endgame.
Billy D Washington [00:53:27]