🎙️ First Hour Analysis 🎙️

Analysis of Matt & Bob Show 08-10-2023

Food items/restaurants talked about:

• 16:45 – Sausage McMuffin with egg biscuit from McDonald’s
• 16:58 – McDonald’s jalapeño items mentioned (select locations)
• 17:02 – McDonald’s salsa
• 19:14 – Coca Cola or Sprite (Matt’s sick beverages)
• 19:39 – Sprite or Seven-Up as sick drinks
• 19:57 – Gatorade (orange juice mentioned for vitamins)
• 20:08 – Fanta mixed with aspirin
• 21:02 – Bubblegum flavored medicine
• 21:58 – Red or orange Gatorade specifically
• 23:01 – Saltines and Ritz crackers
• 23:18 – Campbell’s condensed chicken noodle soup, thick and chunky Campbell’s
• 34:41 – Thundercloud Subs
• 34:46 – HEB
• 37:52 – Apple slices with peanut butter and Fanta
• 42:34 – Turkey and dressing

What was the “Click Click Boom” segment about? Please list any clickbait news the hosts mention:

• 17:12-27:47 – Top things you want and need when you are sick
• Matt and Bob both have COVID
• Items discussed: soda (Sprite/Coke), Gatorade, comfort foods, blankets, streaming shows
• Matt mentions needing Golden Girls or Cheers to watch while sick
• Chuy mentions tiger blanket and comfort movies (Ninja Turtles, Hook)
• Taking multiple showers when feverish
• Lying on the bathroom floor
• Having a readily streamable show you don’t care about

Were there any funny moments or memorable quotes during this portion:

• 00:36 – “You got to make do. You got to turn things around.”
• 06:02 – Bob: “In any relationship I’ve been in, no matter what they’ve done, I’ve been the worst person in that relationship. Because I’m a horrible human being.”
• 06:47 – Chuy: “I Think I found a nipple hair once so that was it.”
• 08:06 – Story about ex who side-swiped a state trooper and kept driving
• 08:45 – “I forgot the ins and outs because we were doing drugs.”
• 11:17 – “If I thought I could get away, I’d do it.”
• 17:40 – Matt: “God damn it, Julie. The water. I’ve been getting a water, a water for 15 years in front of you.”
• 19:52 – Discussion about advertising: “I’m sure they probably ran an ad at some point and said seven up. We cure cancer.”
• 20:15 – “I had that gag reflex, just like your mom.”
• 21:28 – “I grew up when they sent all the kids out on the street to get molested”
• 21:45 – “My shampoo was no tears.”
• 22:13 – Chuy: “The red Gatorade is medicine.” Matt: “That’s a strong Latino statement right there.”
• 23:42 – Matt: “You like your soup like your lady.”
• 25:18 – Chuy: “I think to deal with all of our anxiety, kind of just go in and set something in the background.”
• 34:26 – “It has a red mohawk, red light-up eyes, a gravestone electric guitar…and has experience working at the checkout aisle at your local hobo food.”
• 41:06 – Matt to Chuy about his face improvement: “That’s what you settled on and you thought this is the face that won.”
• 43:22 – Matt: “You know who’s definitely gonna give you the negative affirmation? Any mirror you walk by.”

Were there any phone callers this portion? Who and what was the call about:

• 01:49 – Eric called about his ex-girlfriend’s previous boyfriend who was secretly a masseuse providing “happy endings” for men privately
• 04:27 – Duncan called about dating a girl from Brazil who liked to dress up as herself and act like a prick
• 13:07 – Manny called about his ex Melinda who was seeing multiple people (his buddy Richard, stepbrother Billon, and stepbrother Ralph) and was involved in witchcraft, went to Mexico to a witch doctor to put a curse on a married man

5 Paragraph Summary of Bob’s Rock and Roll News segment:

29:45 Bob’s Rock and Roll News opened with Matt Bearden filling in for Bob Fonseca who was out sick with COVID. The first story covered Corey Taylor from Slipknot discussing how people in their home state of Iowa are still mad about the band’s success. Taylor explained that Iowa has become increasingly conservative and shifted from a purple state to a very red state. He mentioned that there are people in Des Moines who have known him for 30 years and still give him dirty looks when they see him around town.

The second story announced that Guns N’ Roses just launched their North America tour and may be working on something else. The band teased in a press release that fans should stay tuned to their social media for news coming soon. Rumors have been swirling about a previously unreleased song called “Perhaps” which they rehearsed during a June show. Matt joked that it could be the song “Depend” dedicated to the underwear most of their fans are wearing these days.

In a humorous segment, Matt announced that the language learning app Duolingo is adding a new course called the Eddie Vedder Course. The class would teach members how to read, write, speak, and comprehend the linguistic eccentricities of Pearl Jam frontman Eddie Vedder. Matt demonstrated what this might sound like with an incomprehensible mumbling impression. He also mentioned Costco is selling a six-foot-tall punk rocker skeleton for Halloween that costs $160, has a red mohawk, light-up eyes, plays music, talks, is multilingual with a British accent, and comes with a gravestone electric guitar.

Matt reported that Glenn Danzig and members of his band Danzig postponed two upcoming shows in Las Vegas and Southern California because they don’t have a ride, blaming a tour bus shortage. Matt joked that generally they have a van available and “you know who drives that van? Momma!” The Rock and Roll News Senior segment noted that legendary guitarist Robbie Robertson of The Band passed away after a long illness at age 80.

Robertson provided backing instrumental tracks for Bob Dylan before forming The Band in the late 60s and early 70s. They scored big hits like “The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down” and “The Weight,” with their songs covered by Aretha Franklin, Joan Baez, the Staples Singers, and even the Beatles. The Band performed at Woodstock in 1969, earned a Time Magazine cover, and held a farewell show in San Francisco in 1976 featuring Dylan, Van Morrison, Neil Young, and others. This iconic show was chronicled by Martin Scorsese in the 1978 film “The Last Waltz.” Robertson later went on to score soundtracks for several Scorsese movies including The Irishman, The Departed, and The Color of Money. Matt gave a rock and roll shout out to Chuy El Dorado for being the only host who showed up to work.

Did anyone get a rock and roll shoutout/salute?

• 38:00 – Chuy El Dorado received a rock and roll shoutout for being “the hardest working man in show business” and the only host who showed up to work while Matt and Bob were out sick with COVID

Provide a list of bands talked about during Bob’s rock and roll news segment:

• Slipknot
• Guns N’ Roses
• Pearl Jam
• The Band
• Bob Dylan (mentioned as working with The Band)
• Aretha Franklin (covered The Band)
• Joan Baez (covered The Band)
• The Staples Singers (covered The Band)
• The Beatles (covered The Band)
• Van Morrison (performed at The Band’s farewell show)
• Neil Young (performed at The Band’s farewell show)

3 Paragraph Summary of this portion of the show – excluding Bob’s Rock and Roll news:

The show opened with a “Toxic Tuesday” segment replayed from a previous episode about embarrassing secrets people know about their exes. Several callers shared stories including Eric, whose ex-girlfriend had dated a man who secretly provided happy ending massages to other men. Duncan called about dating a Brazilian girl who liked to dress up as herself and act like a jerk. The most elaborate story came from Manny, who discovered his ex Melinda was seeing multiple people including his friend Richard and two stepbrothers, and had traveled to Mexico to visit a witch doctor in a cave to put a curse on a married man she wanted dead.

Matt called in remotely as he was sick with COVID, along with Bob who was also out sick. They discussed what items are essential when you’re sick, with Matt insisting on Coca Cola or Sprite, which he only drinks when ill. Chuy preferred red or orange Gatorade, while Matt couldn’t handle orange-flavored drinks because his mother used to grind up aspirin into Fanta when he was a kid. They discussed comfort foods like Campbell’s soup, saltines, and the importance of having a comfort blanket (Chuy has a tiger blanket) and easily streamable shows you don’t care about like Golden Girls or Cheers that you can doze in and out of. Chuy mentioned his comfort movies include Ninja Turtles and Hook.

Later in the show, Chuy revealed he’s starting a diet on September 1st and wants to try a bunch of different foods before then. Matt questioned starting a diet on Labor Day weekend and teased Chuy about his earlier resolution to work on himself “neck up” aesthetically, with Chuy admitting he focused too much on his face and neglected his body. Chuy explained he thrives on negativity and insults rather than positive affirmation, which led to Matt making jokes about mirrors providing negative affirmation. The hosts discussed how COVID might cause long-term lung scarring and how Chuy has felt extremely out of shape since having it in March, feeling like “an 80 year old man trying to do stuff.”

⏰ Second Hour Analysis ⏰

Analysis of Matt & Bob Show (08-10-2023) – Second Third

Food items/restaurants talked about:

• Louvy’s restaurant (58:06) – mentioned as a dinner location for Golden Bachelor filming
• Domino’s pizza (1:12:31) – caller mentioned ordering large pizza with 50% off online deal and making it last all weekend
• Home slice pizza (1:13:09) – mentioned as a nicer pizza option
• Valentino’s Pizza in San Marcos (1:04:52) – $4 pitcher night on Tuesdays
• Rotisserie chicken (1:18:18) – discussed in context of grocery store story
• Ice cream sandwiches (1:20:01) – story about eating them in airport bathroom
• HEB free donuts (1:18:38) – mentioned as something people take
• McDonald’s (1:21:20) – briefly mentioned
• Ribeye steaks (1:19:28) – discussed in grocery shopping context

News stories talked about during this portion:

• Golden Bachelor reality TV show announcement (48:12-1:02:06) – ABC announced first-ever Golden Bachelor, Gary Turner, age 71, from Indiana, featuring older contestants on The Bachelor franchise. Show premieres fall 2023
• Woman kicked off flight in Brazil (1:21:51-1:23:53) – Model/influencer/cosplayer dressed only in black bikini, turquoise wig, and sandals was removed from flight at Navegantes Airport
• Brazilian man with six wives seeking surrogate (1:24:47-1:27:27) – Man married to six women (ages 21-51) looking for seventh woman to serve as surrogate to avoid jealousy

Predictions made during this portion:

• Bob predicted Golden Bachelor Gary will choose the youngest contestant (51:43)
• Matt predicted youngest Golden Bachelorette contestant could be 40 years old (59:14)
• Matt predicted the show will attract older AM radio listeners to their show (1:00:50)
• Predicted Golden Bachelorette will come after Golden Bachelor (50:32)
• Predicted the show will premiere in October/November 2023 (1:01:03)

Interesting facts shared during this portion:

• Matt and Bob both have COVID – Matt got it after being close to Bob on Monday, symptoms started three days later (45:25-45:40)
• Gary Turner, the Golden Bachelor, is 71 years old, from Indiana, father of two, widower (52:21-53:54)
• Gary was married to his high school sweetheart in 1974 for 43 years before she died in 2017 (53:34)
• Gary lives in a dream house on a lake in Indiana and plays pickleball (55:12-56:00)
• Average age of network television viewers is 50+ (56:35-57:00)
• O negative is universal donor blood type (1:04:05)
• Plasma donation requires no caffeine or alcohol after donating (1:05:07)
• Old TV fall season used to start when school started, now pushed later (1:01:06-1:01:21)
• In Ireland, there’s a carrier airline with no seats where passengers stand (1:24:30-1:24:46)

Phone callers this portion:

• Ray (1:05:42) – discussed putting minimal gas in car
• Aaron (1:08:05) – funded Disney World vacation through plasma donation, made about $800
• Eric (1:09:02) – still wears pants from middle school that belonged to his brother
• Pest Control Chris (1:10:13) – smoked “blasted bud” (THC-extracted weed) for three weeks in high school
• Alejandro (1:12:13) – orders large Domino’s pizza and makes it last all weekend into the week
• Stephanie (1:13:27) – call dropped, mentioned tarantulas but connection failed
• Mark (1:14:21) – 70 years old, dad made him and siblings buy limit-3 items separately as kids, ending up with 20+ bags of Kotex
• East Side (1:16:23) – used to skip high school and get free refills at Highland 10 theater by grabbing used cups
• Red (1:18:10) – was homeless as a teen, would eat rotisserie chicken in grocery store then leave
• Anthony (1:19:40) – shoplifted bazooka gum as kid then returned it; broke into ice cream store in Martinique airport while hungover

Funny or memorable quotes this portion:

• “I’m a little run under the train. Got the vid.” – Matt (45:26)
• “Don’t call it a rerun track. That’s where management starts to get nervous.” – Matt (46:17)
• “If you don’t laugh in this track, we will give you all of your money back.” – Chuy (46:34)
• “In a leather bound album, his DMs have postage.” – Golden Bachelor promo (48:48)
• “Florida wants to retire and move to him.” – Golden Bachelor promo (49:03)
• “Do it for the gram, buddy.” – Bob on being on the show despite being married (49:27)
• “They’re gonna be on The Golden Corral Show.” – Matt (50:21)
• “Ask any young woman today who’s in her DMs and who’s the nastiest. It’s the older married man.” – Chuy (51:01)
• “They call me ol’ freak nasty.” – Matt referencing old USC coach scandal (51:08)
• “This is my dad.” [pointing at headstone] – Bob on meeting parents segment (52:38)
• “Brought to you by the California Raisins.” – Bob (55:37)
• “They better get it on air before Gary’s gone.” – Bob (56:04)
• “Gladys, you get the rose tonight.” – Matt (54:55)
• “That stupid bitch! She can walk upstairs, no problem!” – Chuy on younger contestants (59:53-1:00:00)
• “My nipples are above my navel!” – Bob (1:00:01)
• “We’re getting letters because they still send letters.” – Chuy (1:00:40)
• “I demand we all make this the show show.” – Chuy (1:00:56)
• “Anybody on the Golden Bachelor” [doesn’t have a hard out] – Chuy (1:02:17)
• “No one told me that [tiles] don’t work like stickers.” – Sawyer Stull on his tile job (1:02:44)
• “Modest means negative.” – Chuy on bank accounts (1:03:21)
• “I hate when the gas pump doesn’t end in perfect zeros.” – Sawyer (1:04:03)
• “I got that good blood, O negative.” – Sawyer (1:04:05)
• “I might even eat a whole pizza and just not remember it.” – Sawyer on blacking out (1:05:23)
• “Every pair of jeans in my life has at one day become a pair of jorts.” – Sawyer (1:07:00)
• “I too never bought pairs of pants.” – Eric (1:09:04)
• “Well, you’re gonna eventually use them.” – Mark’s dad about 20 bags of Kotex (1:15:44)
• “Look lady, if it’s 30.01, I’m gonna have a real problem here.” – Sawyer at gas pump (1:04:11)
• “That’s why they have pockets.” – Red on disposing chicken bones (1:18:57)
• “I haven’t paid for a ribeye in half a year.” – Sawyer’s friend using old receipt (1:19:28)
• “Paper towel, get the slime right off.” – Sawyer on slimy chicken (1:21:22)
• “Model and influencer and cosplayer, which means that she is of course an OnlyFans person.” – Matt (1:22:46)

Guests in the studio or special visitors:

• Sawyer Stull – in studio filling in while Matt and Bob were remote with COVID (1:02:18-end of portion)

Recurring jokes or gags:

• COVID vacation – Matt and Bob both out with COVID, calling in remotely (45:09-46:00)
• “Golden” jokes – Golden Bachelor, Golden Corral, etc. (50:21 and throughout)
• Age-related jokes about Golden Bachelor contestants – walkers, early bird specials, macular degeneration, raptime at 7pm (52:03-59:08)
• “Model/influencer/cosplayer = OnlyFans” running joke (1:22:46, 1:24:51)
• Frugal/broke lifestyle discussions as recurring theme throughout question of the day segment

Summary

This portion of the Matt & Bob show began with Matt calling in sick with COVID after Bob had it earlier in the week. Matt acknowledged feeling “run under the train” but appreciated Chuy (and later Sawyer Stull) for holding down the fort in studio. The hosts then replayed a “golden track” – a previously recorded segment – about ABC’s announcement of The Golden Bachelor, a new reality dating show featuring 71-year-old widower Gary Turner from Indiana seeking love among older women contestants.

The Golden Bachelor discussion dominated a significant portion of the show, with the hosts expressing both excitement and making numerous age-related jokes about the concept. They speculated about everything from the contestants’ ages to how the show would handle traditional Bachelor elements like overnight dates and meeting the parents. Bob noted he’d watch despite being married, while Chuy expressed particular enthusiasm for an eventual Golden Bachelorette series featuring older men with less politically correct standards. The hosts predicted the show would appeal to network television’s core 50+ demographic and joked about finally attracting AM radio listeners to their program.

After the pre-recorded segment, the show transitioned to Sawyer Stull joining Chuy in studio for a Question of the Day segment asking listeners about the “brokest” or most frugal things they’ve done. Sawyer shared his college routine of donating plasma before $4 pitcher nights at Valentino’s Pizza in San Marcos, creating a cheap drunk. Multiple callers shared stories ranging from putting minimal gas in their tanks to more elaborate schemes like using old grocery receipts to shoplift, eating rotisserie chickens in stores without paying, and sneaking into movies by checking empty seats online.

The final segment featured “Nod to the Odd” stories with Matt calling in from his COVID isolation. He shared three bizarre news items: a Brazilian cosplayer kicked off a flight for wearing only a bikini and wig, the same woman being part of the OnlyFans economy, and a Brazilian man with six wives (ranging in age from 21 to 51) seeking a surrogate to avoid jealousy among his spouses. The hosts found humor in all three stories while Matt continued to feel under the weather but maintained his comedic timing throughout.

Throughout this portion, the show balanced pre-recorded content with live segments, successfully maintaining energy despite both main hosts battling COVID. Sawyer Stull proved an able substitute, sharing his own frugal college stories and keeping the conversation flowing with Chuy. The Golden Bachelor discussion revealed the hosts’ genuine interest in reality television while providing ample opportunity for age-related humor, and the question of the day segment revealed the creative and sometimes questionable ways people stretch their dollars during tough financial times.

🕐 Third Hour Analysis 🕐

Analysis of Matt & Bob Show – Final Third (08-10-2023)

Food or restaurants talked about during this portion:

• Luby’s cafeteria – Bob attended a Luby’s lunch on Monday before getting sick (01:48:30.331)
• Bob discussed his poor food choices at Luby’s, mentioning boiled potatoes that made him ill
• Bob mentioned his usual order would be “fried fish, Luanne, with the crinkle cut French fries or maybe a cucumber salad” (01:30:50.152)
• Applebee’s – Discussed $1-2 jello shots; Sawyer mentioned running up a $500 tab with friends, 70 of which were jello shots (01:30:44.866)
• Philly cheesesteak from Uber Eats – Story about delivery driver walking to deliver food (01:32:00.872)
• McDonald’s fries mentioned in context of delivery drivers eating customer food (01:35:59.767)

News stories talked about during this portion:

• Man with five wives seeking sixth wife to bear children – Arthur has five wives and wants another woman specifically for childbearing; wives have implemented a sex schedule (01:27:13.393)
• Man bitten by cat develops unknown bacteria – In Brazil, man was bitten by cat, hand swelled, had to have fingers amputated; doctors found previously unknown genus of bacteria (01:28:19.772)
• Uber Eats driver walking deliveries – In downtown Baltimore, delivery driver named Nick was walking orders after his car was wrecked, resulting in 72-minute delivery times for a cheesesteak (01:32:05.618)
• Florida banning Shakespeare – Mentioned that a Florida district is banning Shakespeare from curriculum for being “too racy” (01:36:05.123)
• Maui fires – Bob mentioned Maui being “on fire” as reason not to vacation there (01:57:44.206)

Interesting facts shared during this portion:

• The term “Shylock” is racist, derived from a Jewish character in a Shakespeare play (01:36:08.038)
• COVID typically has a 5-day gestation period from contact to symptoms (01:50:20.086)
• In Austin, nearly everyone has a side hustle to afford living there, except for about nine tech workers and people supported by their parents (01:37:00.569)
• COVID is making a comeback, up 7-10% nationwide according to Bob (02:08:59.799)

Memorable moments during this portion:

• Bob’s COVID diagnosis ruins Seattle vacation – Bob tested positive for COVID two days before a planned four-day Seattle trip, costing the family “a few thousand dollars” (01:48:32.544)
• Bob’s “superpower” discussion – Bob claims he has future projection abilities and couldn’t visualize himself in Seattle, predicting the trip wouldn’t happen (01:56:53.610)
• Matt calling in with 104-degree fever – Despite having a 104-degree fever, Matt still called in to do a segment (01:54:21.250)
• Sawyer’s story about being “groomed” by science teacher – Teacher made him sandwiches, had him sit at her desk, and invited him to clean fish tanks after school when he was 17 (01:43:02.106)
• Bob’s guilt about missing work – Both Bob and Matt expressed feeling guilty about taking sick days despite being seriously ill (02:01:53.676)

Guests on the show:

• Sawyer Stull – Comedian, in studio filling in for Matt and Bob
• Bob Fonseca – Called in remotely while sick with COVID

Callers this portion:

• Connor – Called to share a story about possibly seeing his Spanish teacher in compromising photos online when he was 15; Bob cut him off to take Bob’s call (01:46:10.398)
• Bob Fonseca – Called in from home while recovering from COVID (01:47:00.523)

Predictions made during this portion:

• Bob predicts COVID cases will spike when kids return to school and people return from vacations (02:08:59.799)
• Bob referenced his “superpower” of predicting the Seattle trip wouldn’t happen and previously predicting Frank Ocean would cancel at Coachella (01:56:53.610 – 01:57:27.537)

Summary

This final third of the Matt & Bob show took an unexpected turn as both main hosts were absent due to COVID-19. Sawyer Stull stepped in to host alongside producer Chuy, bringing his comedic energy to fill the void. The show opened with bizarre news stories, including a man seeking a sixth wife purely for childbearing purposes and a disturbing tale from Brazil about a cat bite that led to the discovery of a previously unknown bacteria requiring finger amputation.

The conversation meandered through various topics, from delivery drivers walking food orders in Baltimore to teachers and students in questionable situations. Sawyer shared stories about “hot teachers” from his high school days, including one who may have been grooming him at 17 by making him sandwiches and inviting him to clean fish tanks. The hosts debated whether attractive teachers serve a purpose in keeping students engaged, while acknowledging the problematic nature of such situations.

Bob Fonseca called in from home, where he was recovering from COVID-19 that had derailed his family’s Seattle vacation just two days before departure. He described suffering through intense headaches, 102-degree fevers, and vivid fever dreams. Despite his illness, Bob displayed the same guilt about missing work that Matt had shown earlier when calling in with a 104-degree fever. This led to a broader discussion about the unhealthy work culture in radio, where even seriously ill hosts feel compelled to show up or call in.

The most intriguing segment involved Bob’s claim of having a “superpower” of future projection – the ability to predict when planned events won’t happen. He explained that he couldn’t visualize himself in Seattle before the trip and had urged his wife to cancel, only to contract COVID two days before departure. He also claimed to have predicted Frank Ocean’s Coachella cancellation, much to Chuy’s chagrin. Bob’s wife apparently tells him he “manifests” these negative outcomes, though Bob prefers to think of it as a gift rather than self-fulfilling prophecy.

Throughout the final segment, the show grappled with questions about work-life balance, the obligation to protect others from illness, and whether they should even broadcast the next day given that both hosts were sick. Bob urged people who have COVID to stay home and stop spreading it, noting that many people are now dismissing their symptoms as “just the flu” rather than testing. The show wrapped with Sawyer promoting his upcoming comedy shows and Bob offering public service advice about COVID precautions, a surprisingly earnest ending to an otherwise chaotic and meandering broadcast that somehow held together despite the absence of its regular hosts.