Dudley and Bob with Matt — 93.7 KLBJ-FM, Austin — Friday, February 10, 2017
This Show
Part 1: Dale’s New Car
Dale announces he bought a new sports car (which he’s hesitant to name, describing it as having the same body shape for 50 years). The cast jokes about his midlife crisis while he tells the story of hitting a rock on 183 the very first morning driving it. Dale reflects on guilt about the purchase, people’s reactions on social media, and his philosophy that ‘there’s no finish line’ in life. The show opens with technical difficulties as Daniel’s screen is down and the cast has to switch seats.
Segments
- Show Opening and Seating Chaos [00:00:10] — The show opens with Bob’s recorded intro. Daniel’s sound effects screen is down, causing the cast to shuffle seats. Dale and Matt argue about mic placement and chair positions while trying to start the show.
- Dale’s New Car Story Begins [00:03:38] — Dale announces he’s in a jovial mood despite having a ‘typical Dale Dudley story’ coming. He mentions he’s in full midlife crisis mode, even dressing the part with leather and boots.
- The Rock Incident [00:08:52] — Dale explains that while driving his brand new car this morning and trying to figure out the radio controls, he looked up and hit the only rock on 183 – a grapefruit-sized caliche rock that went ‘toonk’ under his right wheel.
- Elite Motorsports and SW [00:11:59] — Dale discusses his relationship with SW at Elite Motorsports, explaining how he was talked into the purchase. SW told him he’s too tall for Corvettes and most Italian cars, sold him on the idea of a special weekend car, and even said he’d buy it back at purchase price minus taxes.
- Defending Your Life and Social Media [00:18:00] — Dale references the movie ‘Defending Your Life’ where the character hits a rock while futzing with a new BMW’s CD player. He reflects on posting a video last night that got negative comments from people projecting their financial struggles onto him.
- Life Philosophy – No Finish Line [00:21:15] — Dale has an epiphany about there being no finish line in life, just fleeting moments. He discusses Clayton Christopher as an example of someone who earned luxury through entrepreneurship versus his own career making ‘dumb jokes.’ Carissa gets emotional during this segment.
- Insurance Savings [00:24:01] — Dale mentions switching insurance to Matt’s guys at Brown Insurance, saving $1,500 per year. He reflects on how hard it was to write a letter ending his relationship with his previous insurer after being with them for so long.
- Vancouver Island Tangent [00:25:59] — Dale brings up a news story about someone driving a Zamboni in Vancouver Island snow. This launches Daniel into an educational tangent about Vancouver Island geography, with Dale and Matt mocking him while sharing stories about visiting Victoria in the 1990s.
Recurring Bits
- Friday Morning House Party [00:03:56] — Matt declares ‘it’s a house party’ when defending the chaotic seating arrangement changes
Callers
- Clark [00:24:01] — Called to congratulate Dale on his car purchase and suggest he race Corvettes ‘from a dig or a little roll’ to feel better about himself Dale dismisses the idea, saying he’s afraid of tickets and doesn’t know where you could do that except at a track
- Rich [00:29:13] — Called with a joke about Porsches (‘where’s the Porsche – the prick is on the inside’) Dale initially rejects it saying they don’t do call-in jokes, but Matt wants to hear it. Matt then says ‘that’s two’ keeping score of insults
Quotes
There’s no finish line, there’s just little moments
Dale Dudley [00:18:05]
Clayton Christopher, successful entrepreneur, cool car. Disc jockey, douche bag.
Dale Dudley [00:12:23]
You spent two years waffling. You’ve had it less than 24 hours. You hit a rock.
Matt Bearden [00:18:35]
Part 2: The Sweater Challenge
The show continues with Dale discussing personal epiphanies about his life and new Corvette purchase, while also reading bizarre news stories including a woman dying in a clothing donation bin and a viral taser training video. The conversation devolves into an extended discussion about Carissa’s irrational fear of dying while stuck in a sweater, which prompts calls from listeners. The segment wraps with Fast Food Fanatic and a debate over Austin’s best pizzas.
Segments
- Dale’s Reflections and Canadian Stories [00:00:00] — Dale shares that he had an epiphany while driving and wishes he had more secrets in his life. The show attempts to get through Canadian news stories while Daniel repeatedly interrupts with trivia about Vancouver.
- Zamboni Snow Clearing Story [00:01:00] — A Canadian man used his Zamboni to clear snow from neighborhood streets until police stopped him. Daniel struggles to stay quiet during the story.
- Quebec Funeral Selfie Problem [00:03:00] — Funeral directors in Quebec are asking people to stop taking selfies with corpses at funerals. The hosts debate the weirdness of funeral photos.
- Dale’s Epiphany with ‘The Boys of Summer’ [00:17:00] — Dale shares an emotional story about hearing a Don Henley song that reminded him of a devastating college breakup, and how he realized he had survived that dark period and now has a family waiting for him.
- The Corvette Experience [00:19:00] — Dale describes test-driving the Corvette and accidentally discovering a parking lot gathering of Corvette owners standing around with their hoods up, which he found awkward.
- Luke’s VW Bug Comparison Call [00:26:00] — The first caller trolls Dale by pointing out that the Corvette designer also designed the VW Bug. Bob had predicted this would happen.
- Woman Dies in Donation Bin [00:33:00] — Dale reads a news story about a woman who died after her arm got stuck in a clothing donation bin overnight. Carissa laughs inappropriately, leading to an awkward discussion. It’s later revealed the woman was actually stealing from the bin.
- The Sweater Challenge Begins [00:43:00] — Carissa reveals her irrational fear of dying while stuck in a sweater, particularly when changing clothes in a sleeping bag while camping. This launches an extended segment with multiple callers sharing similar fears.
- Sweater Death Hotline Calls [00:51:00] — Multiple listeners call in about experiences being stuck in sweaters, including issues with big boobs, tight necks, and forgetting to remove eyeglasses. The phones light up unexpectedly.
- The Sweater Challenge Details [01:01:00] — Carissa explains in detail her camping scenario involving a small tent, sleeping bag, and multiple layers of clothing that create the fear of getting stuck. The hosts mock her extensively.
- Fast Food Fanatic [01:05:00] — Dale runs through fast food news including Domino’s wedding registry, Popeyes chicken waffle tenders return, Subway meatball warnings, and McDonald’s crab sandwich test. Daniel criticizes most items.
- Austin’s Best Pizzas Ranking [01:16:00] — Dale reads Matthew Odom’s Austin American-Statesman ranking of Austin’s best pizzas. Home Slice is number one, which Daniel approves because they helped him with a delivery issue.
Recurring Bits
- Fast Food Fanatic [01:05:00] — Dale covers multiple fast food news items including Domino’s wedding registry, Subway employee warnings, and McDonald’s test items. Daniel is particularly critical throughout.
Callers
- unnamed [00:27:00] — Called to threaten suicide while laughing about the show Dale hung up quickly, noting this was inappropriate
- Luke (regular) [00:26:00] — Called to point out the Corvette designer also designed the VW Bug First troll call about Dale’s car, exactly as Bob predicted would happen
- Mark [00:07:00] — Asked about the color bet between Matt and Daniel Dale dismissed it and said they need to stop taking phone calls
- unnamed deaf listener [00:52:00] — Called about slipping on pee while peeing Brief call dismissed quickly
- Stephanie (regular) [00:53:00] — Called about getting stuck in sweaters due to large breasts Bob jokingly asked for photo proof, Dale defended her from sexualization
- Jessica [00:55:00] — Called about her four-year-old son who refuses to wear tight-necked clothing Brief supportive call about claustrophobia
- Stacey (regular) [00:58:00] — Called about getting stuck in sweaters with eyeglasses still on Bob mocked her for sounding like she was calling from 1965, but Dale was supportive
- Paul [01:01:00] — Suggested filming the sweater challenge in a tent on the station lawn Dale noted how far they’ve fallen from the ‘baby making challenge’ days
- Jimmy [00:57:00] — Called about bathroom stall design Explained that stalls are designed so people cannot kill themselves
- Martin [01:03:00] — Called with a ‘smoking hot girl’ sweater story from 1991 Made an inappropriate sexual joke that the hosts mocked
- Damien [01:22:00] — On hold through break Asked to stay on hold
Text Line
- [00:42:00] Someone Dale doesn’t regularly talk to texted ‘Jesus Christ’ in all caps about the woman dying story — read by Dale Dudley Dale noted even people who don’t normally contact him were reacting to the story
- [01:00:00] People on the internet agree with Carissa about the sweater fear — read by Carissa Jade Dale disputed that this meant ‘everyone’ agrees with her
Quotes
I wish I had some secrets. Have something in your life that doesn’t get on the air.
Dale Dudley [00:00:00]
There was a message. I was suicidal at that time and I went oh, there was a plane.
Dale Dudley [00:17:00]
This is a car that will kill me.
Dale Dudley [00:20:00]
I can’t listen to women talking anymore. I just can’t.
Dale Dudley [00:58:00]
Part 3: KVUE Anchor Quita Culpepper
KVUE anchor Quita Culpepper visits the show for an extended interview covering her promotion to lead anchor at 6 and 10, her new co-anchor Mike Rush, the state of local journalism, and her personal life including a rekindled long-distance romance. Dale teases her about an attempted kiss in the 90s while discussing news coverage and hiring a barbershop quartet (Acapella Texas) for Valentine’s Day. The show ends with a segment about an Oklahoma town’s anti-dancing ordinance near churches, complete with Footloose clips and Carissa attempting Kevin Bacon’s dance moves.
Segments
- Fast Food Fanatic Defense [00:00:00] — Caller Damien begs the show not to get rid of Fast Food Fanatic segment despite Daniel’s growing anger with it. Dale transitions to introducing Quita Culpepper.
- Quita Culpepper Interview Begins [00:01:00] — Dale introduces KVUE anchor Quita Culpepper, joking about their 1990s romantic history. News director Mike Redding was supposed to come but backed out after hearing Dale’s planned questions.
- Capitol Journalism Discussion [00:04:19] — Dale challenges Quita about why reporters aren’t confronting politicians like Dan Patrick more aggressively, comparing current coverage to Charlie LaDuff’s investigative style in Detroit.
- Makeup Pencil Outrage Story [00:07:09] — Dale critiques KVUE for covering a viral story about a woman offended by a makeup pencil name, questioning why that qualifies as broadcast news instead of stories about people doing actual community service.
- Quita’s Personal Life [00:12:03] — Dale asks about Quita’s love life, discovering she’s reconnected with someone from the past in a long-distance relationship. Speculation and teasing about her fertility and potential marriage ensue.
- Ashton Woods Advertisement [00:14:00] — Dale reads advertisement for Ashton Woods home builders.
- JJ’s Terrible Tattoo Call [00:16:00] — JJ, a FedEx delivery driver, calls in after delivering a package to Quita. Discussion turns to his terrible KLBJ tattoo that lost a contest years ago, including a backwards ampersand.
- The Kiss Story Debate [00:19:00] — The group debates whether Dale was crying when he tried to kiss Quita in the rain years ago. Dale insists he wasn’t crying, Quita says he was weeping.
- Mike Rush Introduction [00:21:27] — Discussion of Quita’s new co-anchor Mike Rush coming from St. Louis with family ties to Central Texas. Dale makes jokes about the name and demands Mike treat Quita well.
- What Do You Got Contest [00:23:08] — Dale runs the ‘What Do You Got’ contest for Deftones tickets and Texas Stars hockey tickets. Winners include a caller who found mini pretzels at their doctor’s office and Uvaldo/Waldo who does a perfect Daniel impression.
- Uvaldo’s Daniel Impression [00:30:00] — Caller Uvaldo wins Deftones tickets with a spot-on impression of Daniel listing free items and gimmes. Dale suggests he could do a podcast impersonating Daniel.
- Acapella Texas Quartet Arrives [00:34:00] — The barbershop quartet Acapella Texas arrives to promote Valentine’s Day singing telegrams. Dale pitches them as ‘The Barbecue Quartet’ as a business idea.
- Heart of My Heart Performance [00:37:58] — Acapella Texas performs ‘Heart of My Heart’ live in studio, demonstrating their Valentine’s Day service.
- CJ’s Hand Surgery Reveal [00:42:00] — Bob notices CJ Morgan has been hiding his hand all morning. CJ reveals he had tendon surgery, though the hosts suspect he punched a wall.
- Oklahoma Dancing Ban Story [00:44:49] — News story about Henrietta, Oklahoma canceling a Valentine’s dance due to an old ordinance banning dancing within 500 feet of a church (Henrietta Church of Christ).
- Footloose Video Viewing [00:53:00] — The show watches the iconic Footloose warehouse dance scene with Kenny Loggins. Discussion of Kevin Bacon’s body doubles and the film’s impact.
- Carissa Attempts Footloose Moves [00:56:00] — Carissa successfully replicates one of Kevin Bacon’s kicks from Footloose after watching it once, impressing the crew with her dance ability despite teasing about her singing.
Recurring Bits
- Fast Food Fanatic [00:00:00] — Caller Damien begs them not to cancel it despite Daniel’s growing anger with the segment
- God Squad [00:11:12] — Dale references past God Squad segments where they brought in preachers, including one that got heated
- Journalistic Integrity Bracket [00:06:43] — Dale mentions Ashley Godot was left off last year’s bracket and files an official protest, suggesting she’ll be included if they do it again
Guests
- Quita Culpepper (expert) [00:01:00] — KVUE news anchor discussing her promotion to lead anchor at 6 and 10, journalism practices, and personal life. Has known Dale for over 20 years.
- Chuck Loesch (other) [00:34:00] — Member of Acapella Texas barbershop quartet promoting Valentine’s Day singing telegrams for $60 starting price
- Jordan (other) [00:34:00] — Member of Acapella Texas, does voiceover work including Treviso neighborhood and infomercials
- Acapella Texas quartet members (musician) [00:34:00] — Two additional unnamed members of the barbershop quartet who performed live in studio
- Toby (other) [00:28:10] — Audience of One member, Iraq war veteran with two Purple Hearts who had his stomach removed due to injuries, cannot drink beer
Callers
- Damien [00:00:22] — Begging the show not to cancel Fast Food Fanatic segment Dale thanks him but says Daniel now just gets angry instead of hungry during the bit
- JJ (regular) [00:16:17] — Called about delivering a package to Quita Culpepper and his terrible KLBJ tattoo Became a running joke about his backwards ampersand and losing the ‘Show Us Your KLBJ’ contest for $5000 despite permanently tattooing the logo
- unnamed [00:24:48] — Found mini pretzel bags at doctor’s office for Daniel Won Texas Stars hockey tickets
- Uvaldo (goes by Waldo) [00:29:26] — Called with a spot-on Daniel Gallo impression listing free prizes and gimmes Won Deftones tickets, Dale suggested he could do a podcast impersonating Daniel
Music
- Acapella Texas — Performed ‘Heart of My Heart’ live in studio
- Kenny Loggins — Played and discussed ‘Footloose’ from the 1984 movie, watched the iconic warehouse dance scene
Quotes
Nobody’s getting in the face of these bigots down there at the Capitol
Dale Dudley [00:04:56]
Why didn’t she go volunteer at Meals on Wheels instead of whining about a makeup pencil?
Dale Dudley [00:08:45]
The ampersand is even backwards. It’s actually a backwards bass symbol.
JJ (caller) [00:18:32]
If this dude comes in from St. Louis acting like the big dog, I’ll be waiting outside
Dale Dudley [00:21:03]